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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-new-address</guid>
						<title>A new address</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Well this is it, my transfer is complete and I have all my cherished posts on my new blog, as well as on my hard drive, to be bound someday, perhaps. 

I feel a little strange to leave the safety of this tiny blog and to put myself and our family out there. All I can say about this is there is safety in numbers and so many mamas are blogging and sharing in the same way that I am...

If you want to see what is new with our family, you can find us here...

www.misspbabyem.blogspot.com

Good bye little baby blog, goodbye!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-new-address</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 15 Nov 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=lessons</guid>
						<title>Lessons</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Poor miss P, we made a devastating discovery this evening after dinner. Sometime this week (we're not sure when) miss p's scooter went missing from our front porch. STOLEN FROM OUR FRONT PORCH. Now I know what you are thinking.....why was it left on the front porch? It was me, my fault. I have never left it there before. I just can't believe that someone would come and take it off of our porch! Paige was so sad, then angry...she so loved that second hand not fancy at all blue, three wheeled scooter. 
In the midst of her despair, a  beautiful sight graced our evening, breaking up our moment of disbelief and the humble sadness of our little dolly. Above us,infront of us and all around us, was a huge, beautiful, vivid and complete rainbow (meaning you could see the complete arc to arc cutting through the sky) faintly above it was its twin. And so we  alternated between tears and smiles of disbelief. 
Later, we made signs about our missing scooter and posted them on the mailboxes on our street..while taking in the full moon, the fullest of the year . 
In some way, this moment, this experience, with the rainbow and the moon it felt like a bit of perspective, for me anyway, miss p is still far too young to grasp it yet, but as heartbreaking a loss as it is for her, there is so much more in this world. Everywhere we turn, God has blessings for us, and lessons and beautiful gifts....full moons and rainbows, for example, and in this case tonight, even a peaceful, little dove, sitting on our stroller inside our garage as we rolled up the driveway, which, I saw almost instantly, gasping as it startled me. As I did, it flew out of the garage, past me and into the air. if that is not symbolism, I don't know what is. 
Feeling a little superstitious and thrown, I continued inside with the girls, made a call, and pleasantly, was able to get a release from my pairing tomorrow, which had me in and out of town for three nights. 
Not to be missed in all of this, of course, were  the teaching moments, that two wrongs don't make a right and mommies make mistakes too, that they say sorry and ask to be forgiven, and sadly, that there are people in the world who don't do what is right and it hurts other people. That we can pray for them, and hope and have faith that these same people will choose differently next time, or that they will, when and if possible,  make right what they have done wrong. Instead of rushing out to buy a new scooter tomorrow, we are going to make more signs, say a few more prayers and hope that the power of positive thinking brings our beloved blue scooter home. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=lessons</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 03 Oct 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=guilt-and-pride</guid>
						<title>Guilt and pride</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I returned to work yesterday and all the while I kept thinking about a decision I need to make. There are layoffs coming and as a way to mitigate job loss, leaves of absences and work share programs have been released, awarded based on seniority, with preference given to leaves. 

All day, I kept thinking about my options, about what holds me back As far as I can figure, the first thing that is holding me back, is guilt. I feel guilty when I work, I feel guilty when I stay home, I feel guilty for feeling like I don't want to work, as if I am spoiled or selfish or a bit princess - ish. Guilt in this case, is a useless self imposed emotion. It serves no purpose.
Next on the list is Pride. That's right I said pride, one of the seven deadly sins. Too proud to cut back our lifestyle  to accomodate my desire to be home, too proud to accept a deal I can't refuse.  Pride is such a wasted emotion because the main person who suffers from pride, is the foolish person who decides to be proud in the first place.
But what if my life doesn't follow the natural order of things? What if I had a limited time here on earth with my family, raising my girls (not to be all fatalistic). How could I ever get over the regret of lost time? How could I ever explain, that guilt and pride kept me from making a choice that my heart knew  to be right, not only for myself but for my family. 
Girls, I will tell you this and then I will do my best to follow my own advice. When you  know in your heart, what it is you are meant to do (in my case, it is to be with you every single moment that I can be!) you really cannot do anything else, because even if you do, you'll be thinking about, when and how you can do what it is you long to do.  Obstacles, doubt, fear, pride and maybe even guilt will get in the way. Know that if you feel it in your heart, then it is right for you and if you don't follow your heart, you won't get over it because you won't have been true to yourself.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=guilt-and-pride</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 03 Oct 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=funny-girl</guid>
						<title>Funny girl</title>
						<description><![CDATA[What a day we had yesterday, the girls and I! Church, lunch at Nanny and Gran Gran's, a visit at a favorite park to meet friends at their school picnic. We marched and ate and played and scavenger hunted! Miss P, astonished me with her recall on different types of trees, which, we have been talking a lot about lately!
To top things off, instead of the rubber snake she was carrying around with her, miss p got to hold a real snake...fearless. It slithered right into her tiny hands, and looked at her as if it knew it was in good hands! 
Upon our return home, we skipped down to the stream with the neighbours and scooped up frogs and leeches to examine in our pink nets! 
We talked about the day before P fell asleep - and especially about holding that snake! 
"It liked you, miss p, I could tell, it looked like no feet from little bear..." I said
" why do you think it looked like no feet mommy, it wasn't green" asked miss p....
"well," I said, "it just seemed to have a bright little personality like no feet, I could see it in his black eyes!" I replied
" Mommy," said miss p, "a snake is not a person..." she stated, questioningly.
"that's right miss p", said I.
"well, then", she said with a smile, " you should have said snake-ality".
I laughed out loud! Miss P, you are a funny and interesting little girl. I love our chats and the ways you suprise me, and make me laugh!
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=funny-girl</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 21 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=interesting</guid>
						<title>Interesting</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Tonight we went for dinner with Grandma and Papa...the girls were excited so they got dressed up, with tights and party shoes and necklaces, and hair clips. 
They behaved themselves (it was a fancier restaurant) and we were so pleased SO as a little treat and a big thank you, they got to have some ice cream when we got home. 
As emmie sat at her chair, ice cream all over her face, she did something I have never seen before.....she grabbed her foot, bent her leg, and promptly wiped the mess off of her face with the foot of her tights (toes right along with it!) Stinky, but resourceful.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=interesting</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 19 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-change-of-venue</guid>
						<title>A change of venue</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's been nearly two years since I have started writing this blog. It has been a great joy, and oftentimes, a version of therapy, a labour of love, a devotion of sorts, to my life, the girls, the many things I have learned so far in my journey as their Mommy. 
I have decided to change venues, and am slowly working on setting my new blog up. Stay tuned for the details. 
The sad part, is that I cannot transfer this work, two years of it, to my new blog. (if anyone out there knows a way, please do let me know!!!) And once I cancel my subscription (that's right I pay for this mediocre site), it is gone from cyberspace and you and I will no longer be able to access this page.
In the meantime, I am planning on saving all of my work and self publishing it to a book for the girls and our family, and I suppose for anyone else who might want it. 
I will post more details as I have them! ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-change-of-venue</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 17 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-ice-cream-truck</guid>
						<title>The ice cream truck</title>
						<description><![CDATA[So we have this ice cream truck in our area. It belongs to a family that lives in the country and we pass their home frequently on the roads that connect us to my parent's town. All winter long, I patiently point out its home, as miss P dreams of summer days buying ice cream cones. 
I should say that for her first two years, she called it the "singing schoooool bus" and we were ok with that. Then one fateful night, she learned its real purpose and tasted its yummy frozen treats.

Fast forward a few summers and the singing school bus haunts our neighbourhood nearly every other night at 5:00 - that's right!!!! 5:00 - and everytime I'd say, "if that little truck comes around some time after we've eaten dinner, I promise, you can have some ice cream!!!!" WELL - one night last week, it finally did! We ran, frantically from our home, barefooted, and emmie wearing nothing but her underwear. We got the cones and I mentionned smiling to the lady, that finally she had come after dinner and the girls were able to enjoy some ice cream. Big mistake. You guessed it, she now comes every night at 6:10...and patiently, I explain to the girls that it is not a treat if you get to have it EVERY DAY!!!! 
So each night this week as I clean up from dinner, I whistle along to the dee dee dee of the ice cream truck. The girls think its so funny, and Miss P even made up a song, 
which goes like this...
Hey I am the ice cream truck, do you want some ice cream? If you have some money, you can have some, if you don't have money, you can't have some. 
I laughed with my mouth open and my head back as I listened, with the sun shining in on the dishes in the sink! ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-ice-cream-truck</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 17 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=oats-and-beans-and-barley-grow</guid>
						<title>Oats and beans and barley grow</title>
						<description><![CDATA[This morning was crisp but it has turned into a beautiful extended summer day. Miss Em is off today as after fighting her few days with fever and she has finally submitted to the cold that took Miss P out all at once. To cheer up a lost grouchy two year old, I thought I'd bake a little comfort food for our morning snack....Apple oatmeal muffins....we already went through a batch last week! While I baked (usually she wants to help, but not today, TOO GROUCHY and POUTY!) miss em, played with oats and beans and barley, spooning them into jars and trays...she loved it, I think she sat and focused for what seemed like 10 minutes at least! 
Anyway, I thought I would include this recipe for the future, in case I can't find this worn recipe this time next year...its a crowd pleaser and SO EASY!

Apple Oatmeal Muffins
1 1/2 cups oats, toasted on low broil in the oven on a pan
1/2 cup flour (your choice, white, whole wheat or half and half)
1/2 tsp (or so) of cinnamon
1.4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp soda
1/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup butter or margarine
1 apple peeled, cored and grated
1 egg
 
pour into greased or lined muffin tin and bake at 350 for 10 to12 minutes!

Serve warm and enjoy! 
Hope you feel better soon, Emmie and Daddy!
xo mommy
p.s. it must have worked, we enjoyed them on the front porch while playing and sharing some with our neighbours too!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=oats-and-beans-and-barley-grow</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 13 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=great-nanny</guid>
						<title>Great Nanny</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We call her that because she is the girls Great Nanny. They love her so (she gives them candy, buys them cute outfits and squeezes them too tightly when she hugs, just like she did me) 
She is my Mom's Mom, my dear sweet Nanny and I love her, oh, so very much. She is 96 years old! 96!!!! She is with it and independant (she lives on her own) With the exception of a little hearing difficulties, and  a short and successful fight against some early cancer in the bladder, she is in great health....except, it has been a week since she fell and broke her hip. 
(big exhale, chest tight, eyes watering).
Oh, I know that nothing gold can stay (as Robert Frost so eloquently said), but my golden beloved Nanny is such a part of my heart. I can't quite explain the calm yet panicked reaction I felt last weekend upon hearing the news of her fall. For her part, I feel that she is OK, nomatter what. She will be OK, as she has lived such a full and happy and healthy life! For me, I am not ok so much with the prospect of numbered days, or a more sober knowing of that, with her in hospital. I, don't know the world without her in it. She is a part of me and I love her so very much. So, all this crodile teariness, I think, is mostly fear and sadness of my own reality changing, should her health deteriorate from its present condition. In the meantime, we are praying for a healthy recovery and just for as much comfort for her and time for us, to cherish and be grateful for!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=great-nanny</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 12 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-deeper-shade-of-soule</guid>
						<title>A deeper shade of soul(e)</title>
						<description><![CDATA[This blog is my gift to you, my girls, so that someday, when you want to know what things were like whenyou were young, it will be here for you, unchanged by times effects on the memory. It is also a way, I suppose for me to come to know my own heart as a mother, your  mother and again someday for you to fully know mine, as it is in real time.  

I am not sure that I could ever describe to you, the joy,  change and self discovery I have experienced since becoming your mother. In raising you I have raised myself too, out of a non committal way of living, a way of skimming the surface and just being, to a way of examining and seeking to learn more about how I want to live. In two short years, my level of consciousness in all aspects of my daily life has changed. I pray more, have a deeper faith and think actively about what and how I can authentically teach you about life and ultimately about yourselves.  Oddly, I have this sense that it is you, and your presence that teaches me.
From the time spent at Grace Mom and tots, to cloth diapering  baby em, to babywearing',  nursing beyond one,  starting on homeopathic remedies to complement more traditional ones, buying natural products whenever possible, to a decision to teach myself to sew, hence opening up our home to my own creative energy.  (perhaps it is the opposite, that your youthful creative energy awakened my own)

Whatever the catalyst, I know more now about the choices I want to make , the products I want to use (and don't want to use!) and the way I want to spend time with my family whenever possible.  

Tonight and many times recently, this feeling of things falling into place came to me as I sat and read through a book I had waited for more than a month to borrow from the library. It is called The Creative Family by Amanda Blake Soule. I understood it to be a book guiding the desire to bring simplicity to one's life.  But there are so many lovely things to learn and take away from this book.  Unexpectedly and of equal value, is the way that the author's words echoed those of my own in recent blog entries and  in my heart. She speaks to being mindful, in parenting (by no means am I perfect at this I DEFINATELY HAVE MY MOMENTS, but I TRY) and of the treasures in nature that children love to collect and how they can be viewed as messes or as natural toys. (my thoughts exactly as I used to see them as a bothersome mess and now I love to have them everywhere on display!!!!) It was just so amazing to see in print the same level of consciousness that has been waking in me, without ever having known of or read her work! It felt like a nod in my direction, a little wink,  that whatever this path is leading me to, its an evolution that is enriching me (and hopefully my family!)  mind, body and soul. How good it feels to know that in this journey, I am not alone, there are other people (some moms some not) out there just like me, some to lead and some to follow and some to take steps by my side.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-deeper-shade-of-soule</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 07 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=talking-to-miss-p</guid>
						<title>Talking to miss p</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Mama", she asked, as her feverish body lay beside mine, just minutes ago.
"Do you think God makes Fairies?".
"I don't know," I reply, unwilling to guide or deter this part of her imagination that is alive and thriving, in favour of some realist answer.
"Can you ask him, Mama?" 
"Ok," I say, " God, Miss P would like to know if you make fairies..."
"what did he say?" she asked
"I don't know," I answered.
Silence
"Mama, why can't we hear God?" 
She asked.
"I don't know," I answered, then elaborated, " I think we can hear God everywhere...." 
"How?" asked Miss P.
"Well, each time a bird sings, or we hear the sound of an ocean in a seashell, or a cricket singing, or a baby cry, I think those are times when we hear God."
"Why, Mama" she asked again, "because", I answered, "do you remember that God made everything?"
Silence.
I guess that was enough for her.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=talking-to-miss-p</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 07 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=tiny-offerings</guid>
						<title>Tiny offerings</title>
						<description><![CDATA[This is going to be a long one...

I have been thinking about this for a while.... wondering if I should abandon the simple, safe and limited world of this baby blog for somewhere else....

I am writing this to see if anyone  has any thouhts to share on the issue.

Here at baby blogs, the inability to properly form paragraphs drives me insane! It is stream of consciousness writing to the extreme. 
It also lacks any other basic features commonly used in most blogs, like the ability to personalize, or categorize entries, for example.

To be fair, this blog site is intended to be an online scrapbook of sorts, lots of photos with little commentary

I pay a little each month to keep this going and that, in as far as my limited understanding goes, protects our privacy as well as my ownership of what I write. 

The problem with switching to another (free) blog spot, is that it opens this up to the world wide web. 

In part I am ok with this as I have profited so much from reading other peoples blogs and tutorials ....some inspire me, educate and teach me, reassure and  validate me in my own journey and in my inclinations and life choices as a mother, wife, woman, christian and all around crafty girl!

Right now, my heart and mind are growing and changing rapidly.....my consciousness about all things is heightened....
 I  am reading and thinking about the world around us and our place in it. 

As a result, the scope of my writing has changed....I have the desire to write more and and to write differently than I have in the past.. 

I still love and need to write about those special moments and conversations with my girls. The things they say do and teach me, and about the challenges and beauty of being their mom, but I also want to. write about the path I am mindfully trying to navigate for us.....

I want to write of the desire to be better informed about the products we consume, apply and discard. About the clothes we wear, the toys we play with and the overwhleming desire I have to simplify all aspects of our life. 

I want to bring us down to a basic level where things of beauty, purity, and uniqueness can truly be appreciated, where two beautiful daughters, two tiny offerings from God are not thoughtlessly moved from one modern distraction to the next, effectively numbed and detached from  their own spirits and the wonder and beauty of the world around them. 

I want to write about how I regard simple pieces of beauty left around the house by loving little girls.....painted rocks, snail shells, leaves and pine branches baskets of pine cones and acorns. Vases and empty glasses of cut flowers, more rocks and dried bunches of lavender. 

These tiny offerings, lovingly  collected by the girls have come and gone from our home where at once they were tolerated and  then discarded...they are now kept and admired as valuable pieces in our own museum;...

And so each story, each lesson and each challenge recorded here, becomes my own tiny offering to this life, our life......growing and ever changing....coloured by tiny offerings to help us along the way.
 (if you made it to the end of this lengthy unparagraphed stream of consciousness, I commend you :) )
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=tiny-offerings</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 06 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-week-at-home</guid>
						<title>A week at home</title>
						<description><![CDATA[What a week....my first week off this month, great weather and I was feeling great too ! The girls were a handful but we had lots of fun despite their ups and downs and reluctance to listen to mommy.....
I could tell something was up and as is typical of us Moms, I blamed my long stretch of flights at months end.
And the full moon.....but it all made sense on Friday as the onset of a cold became apparent in poor miss p....
If only I had clued in sooner, we could have enjoyed a much less busy week and perhaps have conserved some energy.....regardless, here was our week in pictures.....grabbing all that we could from summer's end......

We talked about it for months collected elastics from newspaper rolls and stuffed them into my pockets at work when I otherwise would have tossed them in the trash (so wasteful!). Finally we strolled to the store Tuesday morning to buy more vinegar as I had run out. With all the ingredients in place and emmie napping, miss p and I grabbed all the stained white items we had been saving and got to mixing up the brightest koolaid colours around. She sat wearing  one of my tshirts and a pair of rubber gloves and began dipping the items as quickly as I could wrap and bunch and roll them up. It became apparent that we needed WAY more koolaid, but it was fun while it lasted. We will have to try it again - it was lots of fun.
On weds we met with five Moms and their kiddies aged 8 days to 5 years less two months.
The location was an applefarm called froot to go and we had such a nice time. They played in sand and hay and swung and climbed and ran through a mini corn maze, then picked and snacked and visited with the animals! It was organized chaos at its best!
Finally friday came and daddy took the day off do a little cross border shopping (so bad of me, but when you pay 40$ less for one single item than you would at home, who could argue?) To reward the girls for their part in our little shop fest (95% for them I might add), we stopped at the Butterfly Conservatory on the way home! It is a favorite of ours and never disappoints! Miss P is simply in awe of it (and of her favorties, Blue Morpho's) and em kept letting out whoops of glee as she tried to catch the butterflies (yikes!). We swung through Niagara on the Lake on the way home and mused at what a lovely spot it is, how peaceful, how much simpler than our own place of residence. 
What a week - it was great - busy but fun. Now that I am done writing about it - I have a very sick little dolly to check on...poor p.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-week-at-home</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 06 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-treehouse</guid>
						<title>A treehouse</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I am catching up on more than two weeks of stuff in a few short days. After crossing the country four times east to west in less than a week, I have lots to share. 
Mostly because the way my schedule work, even though I was away for five days, working, I was also home, for breakfast, lunch and naptime 3 of five days, then home for dinner, bath and bedtime,  and through the night for two! By my children's behaviour, you would not know that in this time we had a couple of walks in the forest, went to the farmer's market, and hung out together and played in the backyard...but to me, that time, those stolen moments in a working day, they mean everything. Last weekend, after Daddy was finished with some pruning and trimming of branches in back, the girls set about the task of building themselves a treeshouse...they ate lunch there and played, cooperating and working together. I enjoyed it while it lasted, and then, it was wheels up for me again! The reward for these groupings of work days, it must be said, was the vacation we were able to take as a family, and the end of the month, which has brought me to a month's leave for September! 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-treehouse</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 03 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-morning-request</guid>
						<title>A morning request</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Can we go for a walk in the fowest"...came Emmie's request the last few mornings, upon waking.

The deep dark forest, as named by Paige when she was Emmie's age, is a stone's throw from our home. (See nature walks, October 2007)
It gives the impression that we are in  a lovely wooded area, with much nature to discover. Pinecones, toadstools, logs and leaves, branches and bugs and flowers. 
Squirrels (nutty's), chipmunks, woodpeckers and every so often we spot muscrat, and some weird bird which I must identify, like a crane or a heron or something. Not to mention the ducks, geese and toads. Em just loves to pass through there, to run ahead, or to stoop and pick up a treasure. We have little baskets on our front porch for diplaying all of our finds. These times remind me of the nature walks miss p and I took religiously before em was born....with the intense heat of summer behind us, I am so happy to be back in the forest on a regular basis (without all the buzzy bugs!) , exploring and enjoying what nature has to offer us. 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-morning-request</link>
						<category></category>
						<pubDate>Thu, 03 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-date-with-daddy</guid>
						<title>A date with Daddy</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Hoo, Hoo, Hoo", came the sound, muffled and repetetive. I slowly opened my eyes, to bright light, removing my earplugs (to better identify the sound) and look around, disoriented, to say the least. It doesn't happen like that very often, but after getting to bed around 3:45, following a late Vancouver turn around, only a day after returning from our trip out west! 

I snuck into the guest room, plugged my ears and prayed for 4 hours of uninterupted sleep. My prayer was answered and around 8:30, my wake up call came via Miss P, with her new souvenir from the Airplane museum, a great horned own stuffy. 

I peered at miss p through blurry eyes, my mind straining to keep up to the information she had to share with me, she'd had a date with daddy, there was an f-5 starfighter, fighterjets and old planes, some yellow, some gray, she had her picture taken in front of one....an overall amazing day for a little girl who LOVES fighter jets (see entries this time last year, august, sept 2008)
To explain the owl, hooting my wake up call, she informed me that on the way, she and daddy saw an owl...
As tired as I was, HOOO could start my day of better than that?]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-date-with-daddy</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 02 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-summer-vacation</guid>
						<title>A summer vacation</title>
						<description><![CDATA[After almost two years since our last great family airplane adventure, we packed ourselves up and head west for a visit with Auntie and Uncle...what an adventure!

The flights were a breeze (what a relief for mommy, such pressure as a flight attendant to have well behaved children on board, even though I know the reality after 10 years of flying!) 

Our hotel was amazing, a suite with kitchenette, bedroom and sitting area - perfect for us and all of our stuff! What stuff we bring with us, its amazing, but whatever can make life as similiar to life at home, we bring! Music, favorite stuffies and snacks, toys and all!

To make things even more exciting, was the hotel ambassador in the lobby, named Ben. A 16 month old chocolate lab with a fancy and roomy bed, equipped with stuffy namesakes to give to all the kiddies at the hotel (my girls cuddled these each night, Miss p and little em, naming them sparkle and starboard, respectively!) 
To top it all off, the pool was well kept, clean and equipped with an amazing waterslide for the girls! Woohoo  - with the time change, we were there each morning by 7 at latest, after playing, and eating and getting ready for the day in our room! With Auntie and Uncle being childless, our real adventures started a little closer to lunch time! :)

The farmer's market, with face painting and bouncy castle, a yummy lunch, mommy running into colleagues (hey, it can happen anywhere) and an amazing children's store called Nature Baby, full of repurposed, organic and eco friendly finds....ahhhh, I fell in Love!

Later, as em napped lazily in the grass under a shady tree, and I read (such a rare treat), miss p and the boys went for a dip in the river and to climb trees (too bad I forgot to take pictures on these days!)

One day, we made a trip to the mountains, and how wonderful it was! Such beauty and peacefulness are there....
The girls played in canmore and by a quarry lake, as Daddy drove Auntie and Uncle to the trail for their ride into Banff! 

On our last day, we enjoyed the splash pad nearby (while Daddy took inventory of all the Canada Olympic Hockey superstars checking into our hotel for camp!)

And then headed for the zoo, such fun! An amazing trip, a smooth flight home and a vacation to remember.....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-summer-vacation</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 02 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-moment-in-time</guid>
						<title>A moment in time...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[A few days ago, I found disc two, to a lovely collection of lullaby's given to us for Miss P's Christening. 

I have been purging and cleaning and organizing and many things that have crossed my path have taken me back, old outfits, outgrown shoes and coats and boots, discarded toys, but nothing quite like this sweet lullaby. I would play it to get my busy 2 1/2 year old to fall asleep, while my newborn would cry and wait for me....or sometimes, she would already be asleep, and desperate for a little time to myself, I would play this lullaby for my reluctant little napper...

hearing it again after such a long time, brought tears to my eyes, taking me back to a moment in time, when my dear sweet miss p, was just a little older than her baby sister is now.

It is sung by Michael Card...

Busy Hands, Busy feet.

Busy hands, busy feet
Busy mind go to sleep
Now let go, of your fight ,
Say hello to the night

Close your eyes, go to bed, 
Give it up sleepy head Teary eyes, shaky chin, It's a fight you can't win.

Busy hands, busy feet
Busy mind go to sleep
Now let go of your fight
Say hello to the night.
Don't you worry don't you fret, 
In your sleep you'll forget.
That the work of the day 
Is the business of play.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-moment-in-time</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 02 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=nature-lover</guid>
						<title>Nature lover</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P is our resident nature lover. It is natural to her. She picks up frogs, toads, bugs of all kinds, leaves and acorns, branches, pinecones, flowers, dirt, sand, and more. Whatever she can get her hands on, truly. She needs to touch and feel and care for, to examine and study and ask. Why does the moon come up, why does the sun go down? How do crickets sing, grasshoppers hop, butterflys eat nector? What kind of rocks are the mountains made of and how does the ice melt and run down? How does lightening knock over trees and thunder boom and rumble? 
She is happiest in the garden, catching bugs, cutting flowers or building a tree fort with discarded branches. She is our nature lover and in her way, my teacher, because she looks to me for answers, I must seek them on my own. Learning is life long, and I look forward to learning and growing with my need to know girl. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=nature-lover</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 28 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=i-love-this</guid>
						<title>I love this...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[After five long days of flying, earlier this month, Emmie lu professed the sweetest truth....
Hands cupped around my cheeks, eyes so close to mine, so as to see me clearly, even in the dark. It was the middle of the night, I had arrived home while she slept and this is what she said...."mamaaas? I love you home, yes, mamaaass, I love you home." 
Emmie, believe me when I say it, I love me home too.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=i-love-this</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 27 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=answers</guid>
						<title>Answers</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Not so recently now, I spent a day with a friend, who is an amazing, intelligent and inspiring mother of two. Our children are close in age and play well together. A veterinarian and soon to be home schooler, she inspires me as a mother who is completely mindful in her role as teacher, and nurturer.
 On this day, we packed up and headed for African lion safari. We  had a fun time with our little ones and we talked about learning, life choices, careers, motherhood, and the balance or desire not to balance between the two. 

In our case, we share a desire to tip the scales in favour of spending time at home just being Moms.
Nevermind the work worlds we still partially belong to! 
Unlike many mother's I know, we are both 'in betweens', fortunate enough not to be in the daily grind, but still with our feet in the door at jobs we enjoy but keep us from being 100% full time stay at home Moms.

The question at hand was this; if we are not passionate about what we 'do' (interms of what our job title is) does that mean we are missing our calling, or not using our skills in a meaningful way at work.? Does the fact that we would wallk away from or jobs easily in favour of being home with our children imply that we have incorrectly chosen our life's calling? An answer only occured to me weeks later....... 

To be fair, there is a deeper level to this question for my friend, who's education is specialized, difficult and well respected. I understand this aspect in part because I began this process when I chose a job that traditionally does not imply or require a great deal of education, regardless of my degree from one of the most highly respected universities in Canada.  
I took a lot of grief for it and people, maybe even me, thought I was selling myself short and  not living up to my potential.....they (I) didn't know....there is a plan for each of us.....this was the plan.

There are very few jobs with benefits, flexibility, time off (lots of it!) and good pay...to be blessed with such a job (in my case) or career (in my friend's case) is to be given a blessing to answer our heart's inclination to make mothering our top priority. 

Surely this fits the definition of 'life's calling, to be able to give our hearts fully to the joyful and difficult task of raising our children, actively, mindfully and with as little distraction as possible, without having to choose between or give up our work outside the home. Work that no longer defines us, yet is still are a part of who we are.
SO on the contrary, I do not believe that we are missing our calling but rather it is our destiny to balance between these two worlds......because we can, and because generally 5 or 6 days a week, we do not have to choose. How lucky are we!?
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=answers</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 14 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=for-grace</guid>
						<title>For Grace</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Parenting two is so different. There is nothing that can prepare you really. It was truly a shock, and for me, so completely overwhelming. Even now. 
It changed me, changed "us",  but blew my heart open even more than I thought it ever could...all said, I'd have two more! (if my husband and my anxiety could take it!) :) 

I think the most important thing, is to let go of everything that truly does not matter. The only thing that matters is sleep, food, health and happiness. As difficult as it is to believe, folding laundry while it is warm, steam cleaning the floors, making food from scratch, or organizing closets, and making goody bags for your 2 year old's preschool class, do not fall on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Take care of the most basic things and everything else falls into place. Bite off more than you can chew and anarchy and chaos ensue. With this comes strife. Strife brings more strife ( I can attest to that)...so why get upset that the house isn't right, your husband isn't helping (the way you want him to, need him to, wish he would/could) which is not to say he isn't doing the best he knows how...your 2 year old won't; nap, listen, cooperate, sleep through the night, etc. etc. 

Know that if you are stressed, the whole house is stressed ( I can attest to that, still can, so anxious even now...:). I couldn't see it then. I absolutely could not. There are many things that I still cannot see. I am trying to slow down, breathe more, let go and trust (in God ) that all will be ok. I should have done more of this early on.

As mothers, we put so many expectations on ourselves to have things just so, and when we cannot meet these expectations (who can on no sleep, less help than we hoped for and no clue as to how to operate this new family dynamic!!) we are disappointed...when people don't help us as we need them to, wished for them to, expected and hoped for them to, we are disappointed. When we can"t cope like we want to, wish to, need to, you guessed it, Disappointed. Disappointment is such a heartbreaking emotion. Its a quiet one that eats away at us and prevents us from letting go!

Transitioning from three to four is difficult in a way that is equally difficult to explain. The joy that unfolds as a family of four grows, changes and interacts with one another is a joy that should not be overlooked. More surprising is watching and learning as this fourth little personality slots his or herself into the daily rhythm, asserts themselves, and brings about unexpected moments....things we would surely not trade for the world.

So, do I have any survival tips for parenting two under two....

1. SLEEP (every single chance you get. Think of it as building up a savings account for rainy days, or should I say nights)?)
2.PAY someone else to clean your house. (this sounds a certain way, and I thought that too, but if you can, find someone,sooner not later like I foolishly did, and be thankful for every extra SANE moment this affords you in your home with your babes)
3. KEEP eating simple, a girls gotta eat, but does she need to be sweating it out on the bbq, with a nursing infant in one arm and the tongs in another, while spazzing out about wasps, the heat and her toddler invariably doing something she should not be doing at that moment...
4.STOP trying to do everything! this means, playdates, shopping, errands, gymboree, kindermusik, baby this and baby that, baking, visits, etc. etc. etc. 
5. sell some cloth diapers on kijiji and cross paths with an amazing mother who looks to you for parenting advice and in return helps you to believe that there are people out there who are meant to cross your path, who can understand you without knowing you all that well, and who share your passion for mothering and wanting to do it in the best way you can!

Grace, I hope this helped!(and did not scare you too much!!...remember, I still said my heart wished for more, four, to be exact.)]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=for-grace</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 11 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=funny-funny-emmie-lu</guid>
						<title>Funny Funny Emmie Lu</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Tonight, I lay beside my little "monkey george" (as she calls it! She is, afterall,  curious george in the form of a little girl.)
I stroked her hair and kissed her forehead, her cheek, the side of her face..... 
"God Bless you, sweetheart", I whispered quietly, to my sleepy little fairy....

"I didn't sneeze", she murmured.
"I DIDN'T SNEEZE!!!" she exclaimed, with an enthusiasm that announced the arrival of her second wind, AND provided just another clue as to how that clever little mind works.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=funny-funny-emmie-lu</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 09 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=understanding-a-childs-literal-mind</guid>
						<title>Understanding a child's literal mind...</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Why did Daddy fall down?"...asked Emmie for the one hundredth time....
Earlier this week, Daddy called from the train station, stranded. The tracks were flooded and he could not return to us.
After the girls were in bed, my mother in law came to stay in our house, while I drove downtown to pick Daddy up.
As I told this to the girls, the next day, and even that night as I put them to bed, Emmie asked with concern and not quite understanding, "why did Daddy fall down?" Each time, I explained, "its ok sweetie, Daddy is ok, the train is broken, so Daddy cannot come home, Mommy has to get him!"
Another day passed and out of no where, "why did Daddy fall down?" so worried!!!! "Its ok Love," I told her,"its all done now, Daddy is ok, the train was not working but Daddy was not in any Danger, he just didn't have a way home, so Mommy had to go pick him up!" 
As you read this, you must be wondering how I could be so daft...it seems so obvious now, since Daddy finally pointed it out to me last night.....
Little Emmie thought, since Mommy had to go "pick him up", that Daddy had fallen, and what a serious fall it must have been, if he had to call Mommy in to save him!
Children's minds are so literal. Being around two little ones all the time I would think I would be more tuned in to this, but it is true, they take our words, 100% as they hear and understand them. And be sure, they understand them much differently, much more literally than we do, with our expressions and double meanings.  Their little hearts and minds are so open, so vulnerable for what we have to say and how we say it, for better or worse. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=understanding-a-childs-literal-mind</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 09 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=blue-shirts</guid>
						<title>Blue shirts...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[poor little emmie, I have been back to work, (sort of...don't ask) for a little over a month but its been sporadic at best...mostly weekends...no layovers....hardly a dent in the operation of our home....until last week. 
Ma-maaasss (as em likes to call me)
ended up working three days back to back, up down, back around, in and out like a ship passing in the night...by day three emmie was beyond done with it, the whole thing. Each day, she asked, as I got into my stylish blue uniform, "you go to work? my come to the hairport? no room for me?"
By day four, she pounded on doors to get to me and cried each time I was not in her sight...saddest of all, as I walked out of my room pulling on a light blue hoody, she began crying and in a panic pleaded, "no mamaaaasss no go to work!!!!". She saw the blue shirt, poor thing...she thought I was leaving again! ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=blue-shirts</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 04 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-positive-affirmation</guid>
						<title>A positive affirmation...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I am so very thankful to my friend Johanna who, sent a little book my way by the name of .positive discipline.....just when I needed it nost......correction.' Just when we needed it most. After four months at home through the ills of winter, a long spring and continuing sleepless or interupted nights, finally a breath of fresh air for me, and for the girls . I devoured it on a long flight and on a layover in Calgary...I took notes. What is interesting to me is the positivity it brought into my heart and mind in dealing with the girls, it was empowering, and gave me a confidence in my ability to speak to and deal with them, even when I am tired and they are suffering from a case of the naughties.....it offered simple ways to lay the ground work for a higher degree of respect and cooperation in our home! At first its easy to dismiss some of this wordy approach with its constant demand for endless patience, something that is in short supply, relative to the hours of sleep I am without ongoing in a deficit of more than two years. I try my best always but I don't always succeed....I try to be gentle and loving but when i am really cross I shout, I plead, I have hissy fits.  I am not proud of that but it only serves to remind me that every day is a chance to be better, to learn and to grow and to understand, knowing that the benefits of this attitude teach two important lessons to my girls and to me; one, that mommy is in no way perfect, nor does she have all the answers and secondly, that learning and change is lifelong. I look forward to the many opportunities to learn and grow with them, patiently, lovingly, and respectfully, doing my best, and expecting them to do their best as well. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-positive-affirmation</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 01 Aug 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=we-are-simply-having</guid>
						<title>We are simply having...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Playing and crafting and shopping and eating and swimming and cottaging and day camping and playing going to the gym, and to african lion safari,  and playing and playing...in the back yard in the front yard, upstairs, downstairs, in the basement. Dress up, music, puzzles, reading, dancing. 
We are having such an amazing summer. I will include some photos, and today was one of the best days, we made the cutest tent in thebackyard (much more fun than the three storebought playhouse tents, tunnels and big hunk of plastic playhouses we already own). The girls even ate dinner in there...then we crafted and bathed and cuddled and read. Ahhhh. What more can I say about times like these? They are the best times, the hardest times, the stretch your heart and melt it times, the hit your short sleep deprived temper times, the pray for patience times, the unforgettable, ever changing, heartbreakingly fast times, of raising two under five. I would not trade it for anything, not even sleep.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=we-are-simply-having</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 15 Jul 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=summers-here</guid>
						<title>Summer's here.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[grrrrr.... i just wrote endless thoughts and updates on the girls and how they are right now. 
heartbreaking. somehow it disappeared when i hit publish....

that is the problem with stream of consciousness writing, it really is hard to restate what the heart has spewed, randomly about its contents at any moment in time.

another night, i shall try to share all that has occupied our minds, hearts, days and nights in the last two weeks.
but not tonight. 


]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=summers-here</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 24 Jun 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=this-is-911-is-there-a-problem</guid>
						<title>This is 911, is there a problem?</title>
						<description><![CDATA["oh my gosh, no"

click.

this happened this morning as i lay on our bed about 7:25 all showered and ready for the day, with miss p having a rare sleep in, emmie and i were just hanging out. i was flipping through an nyc guidebook and em was playing happily,,,,rare that i would ever have my nose in a book in her company, but whatever....

she picked up the phone by the other beside, i heard a few buttons, but instead of sitting up to snatch it out of our hand, i accepted it from her as she put it to my ear, but then it started to sing....usually i figure its just another button pushed, but i looked anyway, as i always do, to see if someone was actually calling. 

someone actually was, and i answered and the above, is the interchange that followed. 

following the click, emmie grabbed the phone away, hitting end to the conversation, THE CONVERSATION, the one I have always dreaded whenever either of my girls picks up the phone.

I calmly (resigned to the fact that the police and all that goes with might be showing up at MY DOOR, racking my brain for the 878-5551 that might put me in touch with someone that might be able to stop the process put in place my by naughtier than naughty 2 year old little but capable fingers...) tried to retrieve the call.

 i heard dead air, and hesitantly but relieved, i said, "hello?"

"is there a problem..." was the response, 

compeletly in shock, I replied, "no, my toddler just picked up the phone, took a couple of steps toward me and this is what happened...I am so sorry.."

"but you said, oh my god, no,and hung up..." she said. 

"I am sorry, It was in disbelief, she took the phone back from me, hitting the end button....I am so sorry."

"don't let your toddler play with the phone..." 

wrists suffieciently slapped, "ok" I responded, meekly.

Now here is the part where irony comes in (without my webster's in front of me, I am pretty sure this qualifies as irony or perhaps just a reminder that we should always trust our intuitive senses...)

Just days ago, and my mom can attest to this, this same menacing 2 year old of mine, held my mother's phone in hand, pushing buttons with reckless abandon. She screamed as I tried to take it from her. "It's fine said my mother..."
"No, Mom," I replied, in not a very nice tone, "she could call 911 by mistake...I just want to look at the numbers..." then I took the phone to my ear to make sure the voice I was hearing was from a recording and not emergency response. 

I am quite sure I noticed my mom make a little face, or sigh a little sigh, as if to say, you worry about everything, the chances of that happening are SO SLIM.

And not two days later...."this is 911 is there a problem?" 

The capacity for Emilie and all toddlers for trouble is endless, but Emilie takes it to new levels, everyday, all day. 

Jules]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=this-is-911-is-there-a-problem</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 12 Jun 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mine-maaaad</guid>
						<title>Mine MAAAAD</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Well, its true. Life around here for the better part of six weeks has been like life in the fastlane, but lately its been more like life at the zoo. 
Little emmie lu has come fully into her hitting, kicking, and now hair pulling stage, and my poor heart aches for her big sis! Just the other day she sat sobbing, "mommy, why am I always the one getting hurt??"
Nothing seems to get through to miss emmie lu...Until today....we got the big girl buy in. She finally seemed to understand that she has a choice....if she wants someone's attention, she can USE HER WORDS (or primitive mad sounds), instead of her hands. What a concept. Today she chose on more than one occasion to scream instead of hit, kick, bite, pull hair. A small victory, but a victory.  
Today, there was a distinct drop in aggression in our home, I in turn, felt slightly more in control and  slightly less on edge than I have in recent weeks. 

So, tonight, when Emmie lu took a handful of miss p's hair in the tub and pulled till miss p screamed (she pulled her across the family room floor the other day...), I couldn't help myself, instead of removing her hand and getting angry, I placed my hand on her head and gave it a little pull, without any emotion from me....she let go in horror, cried and turned red, and out it came....."MINE MAAAAAD", "MINE MAD MOMMY!!". And to that I replied, "that's fine", and we locked eyes, hers hurt and betrayed, mine steady but calm, maybe even tenderly..."Emmie, you feel mad, and so does miss p when you hurt her, and so does mommy!". We don't use our hands on people, it makes them mad, it hurts them!!!"
For the moment, it seemed to be a breakthrough but in the meantime, we'll  pray for patience, words and gentle hands in our home!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mine-maaaad</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 11 Jun 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=glad-someone-around-here-knows</guid>
						<title>glad someone around here knows!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[....as I wrote a cheque at the kitchen table, I wondered aloud, "what day is it today?"
as I pondered my own question, a little voice from the kitchen table answered, " 26th...", suprised, I asked, "Miss P, how did you know?"
She smiled and said, "well yesterday it was the 25th!"
Fair enough! Glad someone around here knows what day it is!
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=glad-someone-around-here-knows</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 27 May 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-stuff-they-say</guid>
						<title>The stuff they say</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Emmie lu has this tiny little freckle just below one of her knees, it is so small, and cute, I think. 

One day, she awkwardly perched herself on one foot, while turning her leg out and pointing at this little beauty mark, and this is what she said, "that's mine sparkle..".

Her sparkle! Doesn't that sound nicer than freckle, or beauty mark or whatever? Her sparkle. 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-stuff-they-say</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 25 May 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=in-the-moment</guid>
						<title>In the moment</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Wow! Three weeks of this month have flown by. I don't know where they went...running around and visiting and visiting and visiting somemore. Greats and Grandparents, Uncles and Aunts, Dr's and Dentists....the list go on.
The length of each day at times can exhaust me...6 am to 8pm sometimes later if we are out of routine due to unusual circumstances (visitors, appointments, illnesses, ahem, in summary, the last three weeks). The range of emotions (both my own and of the girls) in even 15 minutes can leave my head spinning.  Proud, tender, frustrated, enfuriated, saturated, happy, sad, disappointed, angry, joyful, woeful, tired, overwhelmed, good humoured, peaceful (rarely this!) fulfilled, purpose driven, patient, again, the list goes on. 
The point of this entry serves nothing more than to reveal a glimpse of the disorganized thoughts, emotions and daily rhythms we seem to be experiencing at this time. In it are welcome breaks from the norm, cherished time with family, and the opportunity to ride the waves a bit, rather than trying to plot, chart, and navigate our own vessel.  Time tends to disappear at times like these and though I have another month off of work before returning to the skies (vacation time), I find myself wondering about this surfing we have been doing, is that how it is when you are home indefinately with your children...when you don't have to interupt your days and nights with sleep needs for job performance, and departures to worlds away? ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=in-the-moment</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 16 May 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=speak-softly-carry-a-big-stick</guid>
						<title>Speak softly, carry a big stick...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[The backyard cleared out quickly. I wonder  if it occured to Baby em, that the child sized golf club in her hand, was responsible for all the fuss. I couldn't help but note the look of fear on the face of an all too knowing five year old, as he ran in the other direction.

She might speak softly, (as softly as a two year old with lots of words and the cutest little baby accent can speak) but she carries a big stick.

Sometimes that stick is her feet, as in get away from me, keep your distance. Just this morning, I saw that same look of fear on the face of the owner of the little shoe store we have been going to for a year. Em was apparently unhappy about the cute little fancy sandles she was about to put on her feet....quickly our friend slid back on her stool, just out of stiking distance. Then there was a similar fearful and bewildered look on her sister's face tonight, before bed. After snuggling, giggling and cuddling during a rare shared bedtime story, her little sis turned around and slapped, then head butted her, for no apparent reason. 
And then there is my face, the most bemused and suprised of all, that this adorable little spitfire, this naughty little fairy, could look at me with love before she drifted off to sleep, with a soft, and almost sweet "smell mine stinky poo bum, mommy". 
Who is this child? ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=speak-softly-carry-a-big-stick</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 05 May 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=much-ado-about-emmie-lu</guid>
						<title>Much ado about Emmie Lu</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today my baby turns two, not such a baby anymore. 

Amazing to think that just two short years ago, I lay in hospital with this new little life on my chest. A stranger but the missing piece to my heart both in one. 

I didn't think it was possible, but she is spicier,  saucier and tougher than her sister. She hits, she talks potty talk, she screams and regularily says, "NO, MINE DO IT BY MINE SELF!" Many mornings and after her nap, she greats me as I change her bottom, with a loving, "U a poopy head."

Even her sister isn't quite sure what to make of the storm of energy and naughtiness, determination and humour that this little person brings to all of our lives. 

So in short, today I celebrate this beautiful little life that has been entrusted to me, providing me with my own private ministry, raising two daughters, and not only helping them to grow, but to grow alongside them, as a woman, mother, and human being. 

I love being your mommy, emmie lu, and Daddy, Miss P and I are blessed to have you in our lives.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=much-ado-about-emmie-lu</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 01 May 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=big-girl-beds</guid>
						<title>Big girl beds</title>
						<description><![CDATA[What can I say? My baby (a little menace soon to be two) is in a big girl bed. I am not sure how it happened.....less than three months ago, she still lay in my arms each night, nursing herself to sleep. Now, she is into all things big girl, talking and being, as the ne-yo song says, and as emmie likes to sing, "miss independant"....And yes, for those of you who know the little tune I am referring to, that is just one of a million reasons why I love her.

I really am so proud of her and all the independence she is embracing. She wants to choose her clothes, put them on, shoes and coats and hats. You name it. I am in awe of that spirit, which I feel is at least two parts her personality, and one part birth order, as we never really experienced any of this with miss p. That miss p, my little dolly who is getting so big...she still asks to be picked up, fed, and carried up the stairs. Though in more ways than I can count, she is growing and changing and being her own little version of miss independant as well.
Back to the topic at hand, this big girl room for emmie lu has come together nicely, though the crib sits on the other side of the room, waiting and watching as it becomes a thing of the past. I had to be honest with Daddy the other night, I understand that for him, two is enough, but I just don't have the heart to part with it. Even though it is a ridiculously priced set of high end furniture, from which we could realize a good return, I can't do it...

Back to big girl rooms....what more to say? She chose the theme, "futterflies"....and conveniently we received a set of 40 year old hand made quilts from my great aunt. They are lovely and not dated. They match her walls, already a beautiful blue. Next for the matress, which belonged to my Nanny C, and is wonderful and in great condition. And finally the maple furniture (two twin beds which can also be bunk beds and a dresser), from Daddy's Grandma. It is truly a great room - with contributions from the many Greats in Emmie's life. 
I picked up a few things at home sense to tie it all together and voila, here it is!
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=big-girl-beds</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 19 Apr 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=clear-skies</guid>
						<title>Clear skies</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We have just returned from yet another Dr.'s appointment, which in itself is wearing on Mommy. Thanks to God that NONE of our minor ailments are serious. It goes without saying, that this extra time off of work at home with my girlies is a blessing. Mommy just wishes she was a little stronger, a little more together, a little less frazzled, and well, to be honest, drawing from a full well. 
I feel so disappointed when I think that while I am at home with my girlies, instead of away at work, I am still managing to feel guilty. Guilty that over the course of two months, on and off, I have not been at my best. Unwell, tired, worried about it all, and unable to just let go and stop trying to figure it all out. It is what it is...so today I remind myself of this; "Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy."  ~Leo Buscaglia
How true that is.
In the scheme of things this is nothing. At my job, I am just a number and there is always somebody who can fill my shoes, but at home, I am Mommy. Only one Mommy, as I like to remind the girls...and a lesson I am slowly realizing is that I must take better care of myself, worry less, rest more, and allow myself to build up a full well from which to draw on in my daily life. If I should be worrying about something, it should be that, not about my ears and sinuses which are keeping me away from work.   ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=clear-skies</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 15 Apr 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=girlies</guid>
						<title>Girlies</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Come on girlies" said emmie to Daddy the other night...to her it is an expression,  a term of endearment used by me, her mama. The gender part escapes her, and that is ok. Gender differences will prevail for the greater part of her life, so for now, calling Daddy, "girlie" ever so affectionately, is just fine. So what about gender differences...its a big topic, one I won't tackle fully, here or anywhere, ever. But I read something the other day and its been turning over in my mind and heart and thoughts and words have been forming, so I will speak to the following point. In the article I read, there was a brief comment on the fact that women, unlike men, are not encouraged to battle, clash, fight for their thoughts, ideas, or praise. Instead, their culture is to quietly undermine one another, mean girls style. So true and so sad. Like ani defranco sang so long ago, "everyone harbours a secret hatred for the prettiest girl in the room". What is up with that? Why is that? I have not always been little house on the prairie nice and sweet but I can honestly say that in my adult years especially, I have been so blessed to be friends with and cross paths with some AMAZING women. I am proud of that. I am proud of my heart's inclination to support, build up, and learn from other women instead of searching for fault, and waiting for their failures. I am inspired on a daily basis by the women I meet, they are resourceful and talented and loving mothers and wives and friends. 
So my girlies, in your lives, you will no doubt meet your share of women and girls who do not do the gender proud, cautionary tales, mean girls, enjoying their elevated status in one arena or another, at the expense of another girl (or more likely of themselves). 
Do your mother proud, behave towards them, and all women, with a kind heart, refrain (the best you can from judgement), learn from them, by their successes and their failures (know that you do not have to make the same mistakes on your own, you could just learn from theirs instead and save yourselves a whole lot of heartache), know that nobody is perfect, so if you act in a way unbecoming, you are never without an opportunity to learn and move on, knowing that each day is an opportunity to be better. Better at everything, your job, a sport or hobby, at being a friend or a sister or a wife, but mostly at being yourself.
There is this beautiful women inside each of you and when you remain true to her, you will see, you will find so many reasons to be inspired by others, because you already know and love yourself.  ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=girlies</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 03 Apr 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=pretty-things</guid>
						<title>Pretty things</title>
						<description><![CDATA[There is one more reason I have not been writing. Since I have been feeling better, I have been spending a lot of time and creativity on sewing instead.  So here is my personal expression in fabric. Some pretty things in pretty things. The inspiration, as always, remains the same. ;)]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=pretty-things</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 02 Apr 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=shhhh</guid>
						<title>Shhhh....</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Writers need time to think....that's what miss p's teacher said the other day before writers workshop and that my friends, is true! Though off for a month (with ear troubles) I have scarcely had the time or presence of mind to write or recount some stories from these past weeks. It is not because nothing is exciting or interesting or worthy of recording.... The last week or more of Feb and into the first weeks of March were tough .....we were not feeling our best in fact we were feeling pretty yucky and ouchy and tired....but now that has passed and all the girls are back to ourselves. Since then, the days have been playful and interesting. Each one different from the one before, a blur of time spent together. (Just how I like it to be.) Somehow I think there was a plan for me with this ear...no other way to ensure that Mommy is grounded than a faulty ear. I accept the gift of each of these days with grace...(fully aware that when I am being grouchy and impatient, I am not being as gracious as I mean to be) Bearing that in mind, I still think that mostly, on a whole, I am graciously accepting this time. In the last two weeks , we have been to the butterfly conservatory, to Sarnia to see great grandma as well as a fun hotel stay, to the royal botanical gardens with friends and playmates to check out everything buggy, not to mention a couple of times at the park and walking in our beloved deep dark forest. Feeling well is truly a blessing, feeling well but still not being able to work, thus having a pile of uninterupted time off at home, is, like the credit card company says, priceless.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=shhhh</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mediocrity-blues</guid>
						<title>Mediocrity blues</title>
						<description><![CDATA[In this world that screams for perfection, it is easy to lose sight of the things we do well, the things that give us a glimpse of true contentment, peace and the knowledge that life is beautiful.  There are certain moments, the smell of a newborn baby's head, the weight of a sleeping child on our chest, or the knowing and proud glance between parents, as they watch the little person they created together (with God's help), astonish and delight them over and over again.  We experience these moments, I believe, so that we might grasp the impossibility and the hope that is there in all things; beyond our control, but enough within our reach to make trying harder to do better, a choice worth making.
So what happens when we become so obsessed with perfection, we are unable to see clearly, the imperfect beauties that lie in our everyday lives. What makes us accept nothing less than perfection in some aspects of our lives, only to complacently accept mediocrity in the very areas of life that are the foundation of our day to day reality.
 Those specifically in our human relationships. So the question that entered in to my mind tonight, while washing the dishes, was this, "if we expect perfection in so many areas of our lives, why is mediocrity ok in others...." I asked this question aloud, and the answer came back to me, "maybe it is because you are mediocre." - to that naysaying voice, I answered, "surely not".]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mediocrity-blues</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 20 Mar 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=word-play</guid>
						<title>Word Play</title>
						<description><![CDATA[There is a backward evolution of speech taking place in our home this week. 
Just a couple of weeks ago, Emmie sat before me with her croc on, telling me all about her jibitz, "I have Mickey, I have Minnie, I have baby jaguar, I have piglet...". 
I thought it was impressive that she used "I" as opposed to me or mine or something. Though she does use mine, as in "that's mines" or "no, mines" or most often, "mine blankie, mine mommy".
So I was a little confused the other morning, when she looked at me proudly, then back at her blankie and announced, "that's me's". and then continued, trying her new skills and reasoning out on Mommy, "look what my has!". 
Forget the wheels on the bus. The wheels in emmie's brain are going round and round. No wonder she doesn't sleep at night. No wonder my's doesn't either. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=word-play</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 17 Mar 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=beach-babies</guid>
						<title>Beach babies</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today, Miss P is recovering from a nasty reoccurence of the strep infection she has been fighting for nearly a month. She is a bouncy little thing, considering the night she had, thankfully we were to the Dr. before bed so she has nothing left to do but feel better. 

But keeping a bouncy miss p in bed is like asking a tigger not to bounce or piglet not to worry or eeyore not to be grumpy or pooh to give up the honey....well you get my point. 

So today, Mommy, in all her partially deaf, ear achey, sinus infectionny, sleep deprived glory, came up with a plan to keep miss p in mommy and daddies bed....

The bed was instantly transformed into a beach. Beach toys were brought up from storage (no worries, they've never seen the sand!)
Hawaiian print shorts and beach t-shirts were donned, sunglasses, hats and various sea creatures entered the room. A blue bath mat became the ocean, a towel by its side for sunbathing. Bubbles were blown to the beat of the Beach boys and beach babies (even sick ones) delighted in a day at the (imaginary) beach.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=beach-babies</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 06 Mar 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=spring-fever</guid>
						<title>Spring fever?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's been nearly a month since one if not all at overlapping points, of the girls (including mommy) have been sick. Sick as in colds and fevers, ear infections and strep throat (twice for miss p) and a burst eardrum and ear infection for mommy.....but as things come and go in life, none of this is a catastrophe. 

We've stuck close to home with the exception of a couple of ski days in between germs....

Yesterday, I found myself thinking, "we've got to do SOMETHING!!!!" But what to do when Mommy had been sick for almost a week...and unbeknowst to me at that time, Miss P was about to get very sick again that night!!!

Hmmmmm....an easy outing, nothing to crazy, what could we do? 

Aha!!! Sticker shopping and a visit to the local nursery (as in flowers!)

So, Miss P, emmie B and Mommy headed off for some warm air and sunshine in a local green house, where the girls, in their rubber boots, ran and splahed and squeeled and delighted in the flowers and seeds and sights. 

Only 14 more sleeps until spring, they say.....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=spring-fever</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 06 Mar 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-word-or-two-about-baby-lu</guid>
						<title>A word or two about baby lu</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Where do I start? How do I accurately describe this little personality that is growing and changing each day. You are your own person emmie and I love to learn more about you with every stage you enter. You are a funny girl with a sense of irony, mischief and curiousity. All of these blend together to form the perfect combination of naugtiness and sweetness that make You irrisistable to me. When you smile or laugh you remind me of my mother, which is actually a wonderful blessing.
Some people call you tiny Ina!
You are sensitive and mannerly and you know what you like and also what you don't like. All is well provided you feel understood.... when things don't go the way you expect, unless it is explained why, you take it personally and your feelings get hurt. Emmie you are in love with your big sis. You do and say just as she does . When she cries, you often cry too, or if she is sad, you don't hesistate to apologize, even if its not your fault. You are quick to comfort with a hug a backpat or a kiss.
If I was a gambling woman, I would bet that you are going to be technicaly inclined you like buttons (you've already deleted my two previous attempts at editing this entry as we speak....grrrrrr), and you have no problem helping yourself to DVD's and playing new ones (wich was cute the first time ....but is somewhat of an ongoing struggle in our home!)  UPDATE, today Daddy finally disconnected it. You love to get your hands on remotes and blackberry's and have mastered the two thumbed movement that goes with them.
You love your blankie and teddy and all your friends.....Mickey Minnie babygagas dodo wannie to name a few.
You change constantly and you keep me on my toes. Though many times can be frustrating and challenging, I welcome each change and the smiles that come along with them....including the lessons in patience as well.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-word-or-two-about-baby-lu</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 22 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=my-beauty-girl-emmie-lu</guid>
						<title>my beauty girl emmie lu</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Do you  want to know why we call you emmie lu? Your name is Emilie and it is a beautiful name given to you by your sister in honour of her favorite show at the time of your birth (little bear). Terms of endearment are funny...oftentimes they develop by happenstance and that is true of emmie lu.

As a newer baby from two or three months, you became very fussy in the car. You had developed reflux as a result of an upper respiratory infection at three weeks and it must have made you uncomfortable being squished into that car seat.

So fussy fuss was all we heard in the car.....until one day, a beautiful little tune called bubbly by collby caillet played.....you like it. Mommy tried to sing it again the next time you fussed but didn't know the words.

Instead I just sang your name to the melody, and it came out like this, "Emilie lu baby Emilie lu, mommy loves you yes oh yes its true emmie lu baby emmie lu paigey too paigey paigey too...."
How much of a geek do you think I am right now? I guess it depends on how old you are when you are reading this!

The thing was, it worked a lot of the time...it calmed your tears and settled you like nothing else. Paige like to sing it to you too.....and the name just stuck.

So I know it sounds like a name from the back woods, but believe me when I say.....when we call you emmie lu, it is full of love , tenderness and the desire to soothe you in the sweetest way we knew how at a time when you we're brand new.
my beauty girl, emmie lu.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=my-beauty-girl-emmie-lu</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 22 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=first-star-i-see-tonight</guid>
						<title>First star I see tonight....</title>
						<description><![CDATA["...I wish I may, I wish I might, have this wish I wish tonight". Recited pensively one evening by Miss P as night fell upon our car.

In the front seat, I listened breathlessly, for the wish she was about to make.

"I wish I could be a Princess..." she breathed, in a voice just above a whisper.

My heart skipped. That was her wish. Her wish. My fighter jet loving, animal whispering little girl, like all little girls, secretly wished upon a star to be a princess. And I got to hear it. And it was so sweet and pure and innocent. What an unforgettably candid and tender moment, a snapshot in time.

"Mommy," she said, from the backseat,"I made my wish and I wished to be a Princess....do you think it will come true?"

"Miss P," I answered slowly, "you are already a Princess, you are my Princess."
"No Mommy" she protested, "I mean a REAL PRINCESSS..." 
"Oh!" I replied, "Miss P, some dreams can take a very long time to come true. The important part is believing with your whole heart that they will...."

]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=first-star-i-see-tonight</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 16 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=growing-and-changing</guid>
						<title>Growing and changing</title>
						<description><![CDATA[There has been a lot of growth in our home recently.  Miss p is growing so quickly.....she is long and lean and we have had to go shopping for longer pants! The same goes for emmie lu except that we tend to go shopping for her in the bins of clothing we have in storage, in closets and from friends!  More notably though, are the changes in development that I am delighted to see from day to day! 
Miss p continues to be the craftiest little girl ever! Her maturity and evolving understanding of the world around her are evident in so many ways through her creations. Her drawings are becoming more and more detailed, with people and clothing, clouds, sunshine, flowers and animals! They reflect her reality, what she is wearing, what she likes and activities she has participated in. As for materials, she uses anything she can get her hands on .... paint, markers, glitter glue, crayons, ribbon, material and stickers....she cuts and pastes and crafts on paper and cardboard and paints rocks and snow! There is a sense of urgency and an unending well of creative inspiration when she is working on something....
When she is not crafting she is busy playing and teaching and helping with her baby sis. This too, is a recent change, an evolution that has reached a new and endearing level. 
The girls are becoming playmates and friends and it fills my heart with joy to see them together. They laugh and dance and sing and play (they fight little too) but they are kindhearted with one another, they use their manners, say sorry and more often,  show empathy and concern for how the other is feeling. Sisters and playmates and friends....three blessings rolled into one ....how lucky they are to have one another and how lucky I am to witness this growth! More about emmies ages and stages another night.....she is still the menace, but a chattier, funnier, spunkier one by the day.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=growing-and-changing</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 12 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=pink-day</guid>
						<title>Pink day...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss p was up last night with a fever, shivering and shaking and pink cheeked and coughing. By ten this morning she was skipping around the house and ready for the day. I felt sorry that I had to keep her home from school, as today was her Valentine's card exchange. When it came time to get dressed, Miss P said, "Mommy I am supposed to wear pink today!" and so she did...pink underwear, pink shirt, a three toned pink skirt, pink socks and red shoes, oh, and pink cupcake clips in her hair. What a sight, beautiful and innocent and everything that is good and sweet in this world, right there before me in pink. To add to the spirit of the day, we dressed Emmie in a red heart shirt, flowery diaper cover, black leggings and a pink and white curly clip in her hair. 
We decorated valentine's hearts with paint and tissue paper and markers and crayons as emmie slept, and later, I suprised the girls with pink baloons, heart window stickers and pink ice cream. The best part was that I had arranged to pick up Miss P's valentine's after school so she wouldn't have to wait until after family day to open them. She sat on Daddy's lap, reading each one, while emmie ran around happily with a Minnie Mouse card and her pink baloon. 

I love the kind of day it was. To me it was a perfect day. Perfect.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=pink-day</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 11 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=jk-observation-and-interview</guid>
						<title>JK Observation and interview...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Life is full of contradictions (perfect example, my last two entries!!!) and I am convinced, that without these everyday contradictions, many parts of our lives would be out of balance. Too much one way and not another, that creates a one dimensional nature, intended for paper and not for humans.
On to the JK interview...observation was cute. Interesting and above all, finally, in my mind's eye, I  can see where my little dolly sits and how for class, two, sometimes, three days a week. 
More amusing, however, was the report received by her teacher. There is something fascinating to me about hearing the impressions of a neutral third party on the subject of your own flesh and blood. The description  goes something like this;

Miss P plays very well with others, she does not gravitate towards any one child, but rather finds a way to relate and play well with all in different circumstances (by her father's estimation, she gets that from me)...she is, however, extremely reluctant to try new things, for example, to go with a reading buddy, interact with the librarian (twice a week since sept and is JUST coming around), or to join her tribe (a group of students from jk through to grade 8). When asked to participate, the anticipated and historical response is, "I'm not doing that!!!!".(by my estimation, she gets that from her father). 
Isn't it amazing, how certain character traits and tendencies are picked up either through nature or nuture or both....we are who we are and just the way God made us to be....but genetics are strong and simple examples of that make me smile with wonder and amazement. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=jk-observation-and-interview</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 04 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-midwinters-break</guid>
						<title>A midwinters break</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Sometimes a change of scenery is just what you need.....its been a long winter, snowy and super cold! Last week, to avoid a serious case of cabin fever, we, along with two other couples and all our babes, took off for a night in Niagara Falls. Three couples, six kids ranging from four months to four years old, and a ridiculous amount of diapers, toys,  stickers and other age appropriate items!
It was an adventure and (perhaps suprisingly) turned out to be something that everyone wants to do again!
All were in agreement .... moms, dads, toddlers, big girls, and babies alike. 

We swam and played. We even sat together for a semi civilized meal at the keg, overlooking the falls! It was fun and I think, for the most part, we were pleasantly suprised with the positive experience had by all. Ok, if I could change one thing, I might opt to chew my steak, instead of inhale it....
The moral of this story is this, there is power in numbers. Travelling with young children can be stressful and is always hard work..... Sharing the experience with other people, in the same stage of life, somehow lessons the minor frustrations that can add up and somehow disenchant even the most pleasant situations. 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-midwinters-break</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 03 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=learning-from-someone-other-than-mommy</guid>
						<title>Learning from someone other than Mommy....</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Finally the weather and my motivation met for an outing with Miss P to our local ski area! To keep it simple, I let go and accepted a basic truth; learning from someone other than mommy is fun! I left my skis at home and signed Miss P up for a private lesson.
It doesn't matter that I taught skiing until I became mommy, the fact is, I am mommy. I am not a fun and cool ski insructor anymore.....especially in the eyes of my four year old. 

During her lesson, to my delight, instead of tears of frustration and resistence, I heard laughter and giggles....
It seems, that in letting go, (of my expectation that I might be the one to teach my dolly how to ski) I am humbly taking on a new role; one of spectator, fan, and proud mom watching and applauding her girl. 

]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=learning-from-someone-other-than-mommy</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 01 Feb 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=life</guid>
						<title>Life</title>
						<description><![CDATA[What a week we had  - its the way I want my weeks to be while my girls are small...tall on time together, low on outside distraction, busy but not too much. 
We did so much together and it didn't feel stressful, it wasn't preplanned and scheduled, it flowed. I like that. 
The idea of this week came to me, in pictures, as a very good example of the classroom that is this life. 

Most of us send our children away to school, to learn. We think of the tradtional classroom, as the place where our children learn. We should also regard the time we spend in our homes, on errands and participating in activities, as an extension of our children's schooling. 
When you think of it that way, it changes the way every little interaction occurs. 
Of course it cannot be like that all of the time, dishes need washing, clothes need laundering, homes need tidying....but stop for a moment to look at this week in pictures. Who could deny that the very best classroom for our children, is the one we create ourselves.
As a friend says, "its not if you want to home school, all children are homeschooled, the question for parents is, how much do you want to do and what do you want that to look like?".]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=life</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 23 Jan 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=holding-hands</guid>
						<title>Holding hands</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Tonight I lay with Miss P at bedtime, nose to nose, hand in hand. I took her little hand in mine, my thumb on one side, and a finger on the other.
The instructor at Em's itsy bitsy yoga says, this way your energy flows through you to your child...(still mad this class was cancelled as was super cute.) Tonight, I thought it would be nice to think only of my love for her, while I held her little hand in mine. It didn't take long, she wiggled and twisted her hand free..., "Mommy, I can feel your blood beating in your fingers..."....we went back to just holding hands. A few moments passed and again she wiggled and twisted,  "Mommy, take my hand in a pinch like you did the other time". After a while she spoke again," Mommy, it feels hot."
"Mommy was just thinking about her love for you..." I replied..."well," she said, "it feels hot and spicy like a pepper....is that what makes your blood red?". With a smile, I placed my whole hand in hers, breathed in the scent of her, and closed my eyes. She turned and snuggled in, falling fast asleep while I rubbed her back.
 ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=holding-hands</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 19 Jan 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-word-about-the-hudson-ditching</guid>
						<title>A word about the Hudson ditching...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Mommy is a flight attendant and Mommy has been thinking alot about this news story in recent days. 

Not in the way you might think I would...not in the way of, "it could be me" and "what if" (although I am quite sure I'd be pretty ticked off if I had to take an icy bath in the Hudson that day...).

It's just that I feel there is something important I need to learn from this story....The problem is that I am having trouble nailing it down, so forgive my inability to accurately express what is on my heart and mind.

It's just that we talk alot about luck and the notion that if something good happens, its your lucky day, and if something bad happens, its not. 

But life is not that simple. There is  more to it than that. It  has layers. And a story like this reminds me of that.

As an initial training instructor for flight attendants, I used to comment how, "you know its really not your day if you end up having a mechanical, then an emergency landing and then on top of all of that, evacuating and climbing on board a raft!!!!". Truthfully, while evaluating this entire scenario in the back of my mind, there was always a..."yeah, like that will ever happen, if you're going in the water, you don't have a chance". 

So here it is. Chance, luck, survival, destiny,  it goes beyond all common sense, and reasoning. And quite on the contrary, if you have a mechanical, an emergency, an evacuation and you end up boarding the rafts, it is in fact your lucky day.

So, when you feel like you don't know what the outcome will be of any situation, like the odds are against you and there seems to be no way aruund the inevitable...keep going. Believe that in all situations in your life, there is in fact a skilled  'pilot' to steer you in the right direction. Not the easier direction perhaps, but once you arrive, you will find suitable conditions to facilitate the next step, and once you get there, the next link on the chain that is your life WILL fall in to place. 
You might end up standing soaking wet and freezing on the wing of a plane in the middle of the Hudson river, but at least you aren't drowning in it. Glass half empty, glass half full, lucky, unlucky, it's a matter of how you look at it, and with new eyes, even the most dismal expereinces can prove to have been the most life altering. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-word-about-the-hudson-ditching</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 18 Jan 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-menace</guid>
						<title>The Menace</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I have so much to say about this little menace who lights up the likes of our otherwise duldrum household.
Her capacity to find trouble and to execute pure naughtiness , is unparalleled.

She is bababababa - BAD to the bone. And she thinks this is funny. It's not just me who knows this about that impish little personality, sitting in a W on the dining room table, playing with a box of PINS - PINS! That's right I said pins...believe me, they weren't out in the open, she had to work to get them out and did so successfully in the time it took me to finish washing the dish in hand, put it down, dry my hands and walk down the hall to where I knew she had toddled off, just moments before. 
I had friends over who have known me my whole life and they said things like, "Jules - she's FAST!!!"..."she's going to be your party girl" and "she is so proud of herself when she finds trouble". 
Don't I know it all. How do you discipline a toddler who smiles whenever she gets into mischief? 
What makes this more difficult is that I think I half admire her ability to just "get into it...." all of it.  She doesn't like a show - she changes the channel, goes and gets a new dvd, opens it player and tries to put it in...or she just turns it off, "bye bye td". If she doesn't like her food, she throws it on the floor, "all dun mahmee!", followed by several, "uhoh's" in the general direction of the mess she has made. When she''s had enough of her sister's need to control/monopolize all toys, treats and other resources, no problem. She'll think it through for a bit, then draw her hand back slowly, hitting her sister like she means it. If you look at her like you didn't quite get the point she was making, she'll hit you again.
got it? Emilie, they say, means industrious, I say, "they're right"!
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-menace</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 10 Jan 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=me-me-my-mono-no-no</guid>
						<title>Me me my mo......no no no!!!!!!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Along with a new year  We find ourselves with a new soon to be two year old dolly among us!

She can no longer be refered to as baby em....mostly we just refer to her as the menace or troublemaker one or two (depending on severity of her naughties) she is a crackly, menace and tough  - but soft in her mamas arms.

Menace like in her ability to find more mischief,she knows how to get a reaction out of her sister, to run like the wind when she has been caught and to throw away the evidence when her capture is imminent.

Oh baby em (always a baby to me) you are a unique and sparkly spirit....you keep us all on our toes and we. Lookforward to watching your impish little character grow.....
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=me-me-my-mono-no-no</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 07 Jan 2009 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-gift-for-mommy</guid>
						<title>A gift for Mommy</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's true, sometimes, the best gifts are the ones we give ourselves. Patience, forgiveness, sleep, idleness, a good book, coffee with a friend, or in my case, a month off of work. Just because. On a whim. Not because I don't like work, or because I don't want to work, because I do. I like my job, am good at my job, and find a validation in my work that has been missing in my life for a couple of years. Not that I need work to feel validated. I feel that way through my home, my girls, and my own attempts to live and learn and grow. But I won't lie. There is something to be said for being told how great you are, how kind, how hardworking, how funny and professional. I like that, about my job. I have also had some amazing sleeps lately in decent hotels, so no complaints there. But, as they say, home is where the heart is, and though I put a lot of heart into what I do at work, my heart, at the end of the day, resides in one place only; and that is right here where I am sitting at this moment. In my home, with my girls , while one sleeps and the other plays with Daddy. 

So, a month off to just be, in this place with them, is a gift that no one else could give to me. A gift that's value is lasting and infinite. A gift of time to just be Mommy without the demands of that other world to which I have recently returned. And though I have found my edges to be rounded by the parts of it that have been absent in my life in the last two years, I softly retreat to this bubble I have created for myself and my girls. Hands down, the best gift I have given myself in some time.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-gift-for-mommy</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 29 Dec 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=riches-of-the-season</guid>
						<title>Riches of the season</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I should have something to say. It was, afterall, a perfect day. Short on conflict, tall on family,  laughter, and love. Who could ask for more? A warm house, full tummies, presents beneath the tree. Four generations together to share in a a family meal, celebrating. Celebrating the gifts of faith, hope and love to this world. To our lives, and in our hearts. I loved watching my girls play with my brother, their daddy, eachother. I loved that they put on a show for their Great Grandmothers. Admittedly, I missed my Gran Gran terribly as the night went on. He would have loved the Elmo toy that Santa gave to Em. But I am ever thankful for the memories of Christmas' past with him. So these moments are the riches of the season, and I cherish them. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=riches-of-the-season</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 26 Dec 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=musings-from-38000-feet</guid>
						<title>Musings from 38000 feet</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I have been flying a lot lately, and so is the general public. Just as many vehicles have dvd players and screens for passengers, so too does my airline. The people love it. The flight attendants love it - the people don't bug or stare as much! All except for the annoyance of having to repeat questions three times at increasing volume as the passengers have the volume up so loud they cannot hear and are so engrossed with this screen in front of them and whatever is on it,  that they are not even aware of the living, breathing  being standing in front of them, attempting to engage them the old fashioned way. The old fashioned, way, that is to say, not via headphones, video screens sms, or email. The medium is the message, that's old news and I was reminded of this on a recent flight to Vancouver from Calgary. It was a beautiful, clear, sunny day, a day perfect for two of my favorite things, skiing and flying. On this flight,  I noticed that all the people packed into their seats with their snacks and screens and headsets,  were oblivious to the majestic view layed out beneath them, around them and  before them. There out their windows was a stunning view of snowcovered mountains, with the sun and blue sky gleaming, a truly breathtaking sight, and nobody seemed to notice. What could be more amazing to look at? What could at the same time, remind you of how small you are, how big the world is and truly how much bigger it is than any of us.?How could anyone not contemplate the idea, that in marvelling at the peaks and faces of mountains, we may also be marvelling at the face of God himself? More shocking to me, was that most people chose to close their blinds, essentially blocking out the light to better view their own screens. Isn't that what most do with God and religion in our society? If it can't be pushed, plugged in, sent and certainly if it has no screen, it cannot be of any interest. 
So my girlies, finally my point. DO NOT under any circumstances, choose to watch an imaginary life unfold before you on a screen in favour of actively living your own life. DO NOT, close your blinds to the beauty and the pain of real life, in favour of something more detached and predictable. Do not close out the light which is there for you, to better view something in darkness. Do not choose only to believe in that which you can see, understand and control, but believe that every breath and moment on this earth is a miracle created and planned for you by none other than God himself. That there is true strength in faith and weakness in doubt. And always always, when given the chance, peek out the window of an airplane to look at the mountains below.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=musings-from-38000-feet</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 17 Dec 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=maman-prend-un-test-de-francais</guid>
						<title>maman prend un test de francais</title>
						<description><![CDATA[J'ai juste fini mon test de francais pour le travail....je n'aime pas des tests. Vingt minutes de parler francais apres deux ans chez nous sans parler un mot. Ca va, j'ai fait d'accord mais pas excellent. 
Les tests sont dur. Les tests sont un test de plus qu'on sait. Ils jugent comment on fait quand nous sommes nerveuses.....quand quelqu'un nous regarder. C'est comme ca dans la vie. Chaque jour, chaque tristesse, chaque joie, c'est un test de notre personalite, de notre couer. La chose la plus important n'est pas si on est parfait, si on sait tous les responses, ce qui est importante est si on apprend par notre erreurs,  si on continue d'apprendre. Ca c'est la seule facon qu'on peut realiser ce qui est dans nos couers.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=maman-prend-un-test-de-francais</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 01 Dec 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=being-mommy</guid>
						<title>Being Mommy</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I have to say, I really really like this job. This Mommy job. And though I love it and it makes me mushy and emotional and impatient, and overwhelmed with love and frustration, sometimes all at the same time, there is no doubt that it is a job. Mostly because it is work. Hard work. Somedays, I am better at it than others. Somedays, I am on my game and others not so much. Not so much days, make getting dressed, leaving the house, and cooking seem daunting. Game days, make it look and feel easy, like the stars are aligned for you and your babes just to remind you how special this time is. How important and rewarding this job is. That it isn't always hard. That as Mommy you should step back from the sink, and take it all in. Because, it won't always be the same job. It's hard to imagine now, and it breaks my heart a little just thinking about it, but someday, Mommy won't be a boo boo kisser, a diaper changer or a mitten put-er on-er. Someday, Mommy will be the hairstyler, the homework helper, the target of many a rolling eyes. But what I realize is that with every breath I take, every moment I spend, be it on the computer, the phone, my BB, shopping, talking to friends, colleagues and strangers even, with hobbies, and music and cooking and well, everything, I am living it all for my little girls. So when I read something that says, of all a women's rights, the most important is the right to be a mother, I agree, wholeheartedly. Of course I have another job, and I do it well, to the best of my ability, but there is no doubt in my heart and mind that my greatest calling, my life's purpose is to be a mother, your mother, miss p and baby em. Best part is, I am happy right where I am, I am in no rush to be promoted or to climb the ladder. I could stay here, right now in this place for a long time. Learning and growing and loving with you.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=being-mommy</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 24 Nov 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=riverdancer</guid>
						<title>riverdancer?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Tonight, Miss P tried out an irish dance class. It was interesting for me and SO MUCH FUN for Miss P. Girls and boys and moms and dads of all ages were packed into this grim and run down looking dance studio, which , given the cheerful music and bustling atmosphere, didn't seem to bother anyone, not even me. Miss P, more importantly had a great time. She sat compliantly for opening stretches, while I watched her reflection in the mirror (so couldn't see me and hence be distracted.) Once, she looked around uncertainly, and I peeked me head in the door, waved and gave a reassuring smile. AND THAT WAS THAT. The door closed and about 15 mins later one of the young instructors came out (gushing about how cute she is:)) and saying how much she was loving it. At break time, she didn't even want to leave the room for water, and had a smile from ear to ear. She loved it and wants to come back. In her words, "this is a place for me, this is something I would like to do." If I must confess, while I sat waiting and watching (ok I was also working on the hideous bidding process I must endure each month for my work schedule) I wondered, if this might be a place I would be sitting 2, 4, 5, or even 10 years from now. It seemed to be a supportive, confidence boosting and team building environment, so if, as Miss P says, "this is a place for her", then I don't mind one bit.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=riverdancer</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 19 Nov 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=dance-and-talk-and-sing</guid>
						<title>Dance and talk and sing</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P has her own way of saying it, "lets hit the splits, come on Mommy, its time to rock it out!" That means, right now, lets DANCE! Emmie loves to spin around and around and she's got the beat too...with her head bobbing, she even has a favorite song, which she sings, "Battu Battu Battu" from Putumayo's African playground. She has started demanding that I play it by using two word directives..."Battu, ONNNN!". Then she puts her head down and spins until she can't stand up. As for "hitting the splits" Miss P is in an orbit of her own on the dance scene. She moves around in her own groove, legs and arms and body flailing about! They love it, and so do I. I also love the things they say. Like miss p, yesterday, all serious, "mommy, how do you say Jesus in Chinese!?" Where does she come up with this stuff! Or after talking about a country song we heard about a man seeing God, I explained to Miss P that if God was in our hearts, then it was the same as Him being everywhere. In agreement, miss P nodded, "and God can see everything in our hearts too". Again. Where does she get this stuff? And yesterday, as Em and I looked at stained glass and she tickled the toes she saw in the images. Or as she lay on my lap, nestled into my arms, looking up at a mural on the wall, she pointed and said, "Jesus". These moments are fast and plentiful, but each one is wonderous and worthy of being remembered. For its purity, and innocence and importance. These are the moments that I hope to preserve simply by writing them down. I am so thankful that I can.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=dance-and-talk-and-sing</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 13 Nov 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=miss-p-is-four</guid>
						<title>Miss P is four!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[And I am a bad mother who is only writing about her first born's birthday more than a week after the fact! She's four. She weighs forty pounds. Is forty inches tall. It's all about the fours. And I am so in love with her. Sometimes, when she falls asleep, I just stroke her face and kiss her and it feels like I can't breath in these moments, through teary eyes, so overwhelmed by my love for her, for my gratitude for her entry into my world and her occupancy in my heart. In the waking hours I do my best as she grows to encourage her, to build her up and to give her new opportunities to be a big girl. To help her learn and value what it feels like to be trusted with new experiences and responsibilities. To teach her to be kind and polite and proud of herself and supportive of others. Watching her sleep, my eyes will only ever see my sweet baby daughter but in the waking hours, it is my hope that I will come to know, accept, respect and encourage her as the person she was meant to be. Though it breaks my heart a little that these early years are so fleeting, it is my deepest wish to walk with her on the path that she is meant to follow. Wherever she is meant to be, I hope to be there too. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=miss-p-is-four</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 11 Nov 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=how-do-you-say</guid>
						<title>How do you say....</title>
						<description><![CDATA[For whatever reason, Miss P wants to know how to say things in French. "Mommy, how do you say...eat, apple, car, etc.etc."...until Mommy doesn't know a word. Then the game takes pause, while Miss P collects her thoughts. 
"Mommy?..." asks Miss P, "does Jesus speak French?" "Yes, Miss P, I suppose he does, since God made all the different people speak all the different languages, he must understand French."...."so, do you think if we don't know a word, we could ask Jesus to help us?" asks Miss P...."well, Miss P," say I, "its funny you should say that, as Mommy, on more than one occasion, has prayed to Jesus when she didn't know the words...." "and did He tell you them..." she breathed, "yes, he did" I say, "and did He just put the right words into your heart, Mommy" she continued..."yes, Miss P, He did, I just opened my mouth, and the right words came out." She liked that conversation, but was ready to move on...I wanted to continue, I wanted to take the opportunity to remind her that whenever she did not know the answer, for whatever questions she found in her heart, praying to Jesus was a good place to start. But, the moment was lost and that was ok. The next day, the game started again, "how do you say....in French..??" When I answered, with an "I don't know..." miss P looked at me with a little grin and said, "Pray to Jesus, Mommy?". I love the ways she makes me smile  and more than that, I love moments like this one, that let me peek into that mysterious and wonderous little mind - a little glimpse at how literal a four year old's mind and heart is. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=how-do-you-say</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 29 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mutiny</guid>
						<title>Mutiny</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Mutiny is a conspiracy among members of a group of similarly-situated individuals to openly oppose, change or overthrow an existing authority. The term is commonly used for a rebellion among members of the military against their superior officer(s).
It's been going on in our home for more than a week, two actually. More frequent night wakings, a slow and definate preference for all things Daddy...it hit a peak last weekend - when Daddy was home and Mommy had just finished a full week of training. Absent from her girls for a full five days. 
I didn't like the way it felt, yet, I understood. While Miss P couldn't articulate it, Daddy remained constant, Mommy was betraying her with change. How dare she return to work? I even laughed a little about it, reminding myself that I am the grown up. But right now, in this moment, I don't feel very grown up. I am tired and not feeling well. I had to book off of work after not even two full days back, with an ear infection. I feel uncertain about everything and to add insult to injury, in the middle of a tantrum, Miss P, the apple of my eye, yells at me, "I want you to go back to work..." at the time I took it ok, but in the hour that followed, I didn't take it ok at all. I cried, yelled, picked a fight with Daddy, and told miss p out right, in no uncertain terms, that she hurt my feelings, that although she was too little to understand, and mommy was too tired and stressed and feeling yucky to act like a mommy should in moments like these, mommy was not very pleased with the whole scenario. not very pleased at all.  I apologized, Its not my place to make her feel guilty for my reality, her new reality, or the way she is feeling in reaction to it, I don't want her to feel guilty, I love her so much and I am just really angry right now that I am not 100% for her or em or daddy, or work or myself. Mutiny is hurtful and bad for the ego....especially when its right at the heart of who you've prided yourself in being, which is all things, to two small little people, entrusted to you by God himself. 
Handing over bits and pieces, here and there is bound to backfire on more than one level. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mutiny</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 18 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=thankful-for-fighter-jets</guid>
						<title>thankful for fighter jets...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Thats what the craft says...she made it at school...I really want to post it up in our kitchen, because, its the best picture ever. there is a black fighter jet in a blue sky, and other things too, except I can't remember what exactly, and I am not allowed to see. New rules....all crafts and things made with love by miss p, must bypass mommy and go directly upstairs, on display for goldie. did i mention there are some new rules in our house? this past week saw a bit of mutiny on the homefront...mommy's punishment for returning to work.....more about that another night.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=thankful-for-fighter-jets</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 17 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mo-mo-mo-mo-momo</guid>
						<title>mo, mo, mo, mo, mo......mo!!!!!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[complete with accompanying signs, that is emmies favorite thing to say, when she encounters something she likes ....really really likes. there is a lot that that emmie likes and likes to say. she is becoming quite chatty. she can say, eese, and shooooosss, and taku, and onnnnnn. her latest word is teet (as in treat) the kind she likes to have after her yucky medicine, for taking it without spitting it all over mommy. she, too, has undergone this amazing trasformation, along with her sister, timed perfectly with my return to work...she is without a doubt a toddler, gritty and determined  and frustrated and cute. 
two little girls, growing and changing, and a mommy who seems to have woken up after a big long 18 month dream....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mo-mo-mo-mo-momo</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 15 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-pet-fish</guid>
						<title>a pet fish...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[well, its been a couple of weeks now and miss p is the proud owner of a pet fish. at first her adoration and loyalty were over the top. long conversations with goldie and many crafts and secrets layed out before her....things have calmed down a little, but goldie is still a fish that is loved dearly. and sussie is seemingly a distant memory, with the exception of the other night, as we were leaving my mom and dad's house after thanksgiving dinner, sleepy, bathed, in jammies and snug in her car seat, as we drove away, miss p murmured out of habit, where's sussie? it was the first time we had gone through the whole routine at their home, without that little red suss, as an exclaimation point to the end of her evening. suddenly, it seems, and perhaps in sync with my return to work, miss p has become this little big girl. more big than little, as she approaches her fourth birthday. she is long and lean and conversant as a six year old might be. it seems, that goldie the fish, has happened upon a maturing and loving young girl as her owner....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-pet-fish</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 15 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=ive-just-got-to-do-it</guid>
						<title>I've just got to do it...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[...Miss P, sitting on the potty before her bath, looks at me and says, "....even though Daddy doesn't want another baby, I've just got to do it...if I'm going to be a Mommy some day, I have to just go ahead and grow a baby in my tummy..." 
I am not sure where this is coming from. Miss P wants more babies in the house...she has made that clear on and off for a couple of months. She likes the name, Mackenzie, for a girl, Nicholas for a boy. She is alone in this campaign....(well, Mommy would support her, if we had a cook and a maid and a nanny.)
So obviously she has been thinking that she needs to take matters into her own hands. So I say, 
"Hopefully you'll be a Mommy someday Miss P, but not until you're grown, and Daddy won't be the Daddy, your husband will, Daddy will be the Grandad." hmmmm the wheels are turning..... "well, I don't want to pick anyone else, so Daddy will have to be my husband...". It's amazing and innocent and so hard to put myself into her reality. We are the centre of her world, well she is, actually, but as Mommy and Daddy, we rate high. Very, Very, high. How lucky we are, to be loved so unconditionally and completely. There is nothing we have to do, we just have this amazing gift of not one, but two little girl's love. It's hard, when you are tired, and stressed (about things that don't really matter , but you think they matter because  everyone else thinks they matter) to actually put into your mind and heart the notion that this kind of love, this kind of undying devotion, is really the only thing you need. Nothing else really has the urgency or the importance that it initially seems to have when you take pause and consider that to this one little soul, you are all things. Her world.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=ive-just-got-to-do-it</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 05 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=some-other-beginnings-end</guid>
						<title>some other beginning's end.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[...."you know, Miss P," I said, "if you keep not listening, I might have to think about taking your sussy away.." I said it in a non-threatening way, during a quiet moment, thinking out loud, brainstorming, with my nearly four year old selective listerner, about ways to get her attention and keep it, on the subject of listening. The response, at the time, was matter of fact, though in another context, may have seemed defiant, "well, that's ok, I am ready to give it up....does that mean I can keep climbing?"... a challenge, how could it be, it was sunny, she was playing, I was changing Emilie, we were just hanging out, and nobody seemed to be testing anybody....
later that day, Miss P mentionned to her Grandma and Papa that she was ready to give up her sussy, and again at bedtime. She requested a visit from the sussy fairies (something we introduced at around 2ish), to come and get her suss, "will they sprinkle fairy dust, she asked?"  I smiled but later, I told Daddy that if she came crying, I would not lie, not persist, I would give her back her suss, or he could deal with it....but her being ready was absolutely necessary. She woke up later crying, "her heart wasn't ready", she said. "Sussy fairies, are very intuitive," we told her, "if her heart wasn't ready, they'd know and they'd leave her suss behind.". Again the next night, we tried, at her request, again, she cried. Again, we gave it back. Then, a funny thing happened in the morning. With no recollection of having woken up crying in the night, Miss P climbed on our bed, sussy in her mouth and tears pouring down her face. "the sussy fairies didn't come!" she cried, "I don't WANT MY SuSSY anymore! She requested that we go downstairs and that she be permitted to throw her sussy away, outside. There, we stood, at 7 am on a Tuesday in late September, on our front porch, in the pouring rain....my little miss p, a girl, who will soon no longer be three, tossed that suss, clear into the neighbours driveway, turned and went back inside.  Can I say how proud of her I felt? She never looked back. Except later, to ensure that it was gone. Which it was. And with that era behind us, there came the promise of a new one to follow, life with a pet fish.....more on that tomorrow.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=some-other-beginnings-end</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 03 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=taddy</guid>
						<title>TADDY!!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's so cute, I just love this stage that Baby EM is in. She's my dolly babe, a little monkey and now she is trying SO HARD to talk. She roams around the house, calling out, "TADDY, TADDY", looking for her little teddy bear, to whom she is becoming more and more attached by the day! (look out blankie!)....What else is she saying???Well lets see, she says, ees (please) tees (cheese), boys, toys, toes, nose (beep beep), eyes (which sounds more like ay-ssss), today, she said lambie (miss p's stuffy guy), baby, oos (shoes), and a few more besides. 

Anyway, her personality is seemingly changing by the day. She is so proud of herself and has even started enjoying a bit of an audience, which is suprising, and cute because its usually miss p demanding that all eyes are on her...
Learning to talk, how special and fun. Baby em, lucky for you your maman knows a little about talking, as does your sister, we'll make a point to let you get a word in edgewise....and we'll enjoying watching you learn.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=taddy</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 24 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=all-you-have-to-do-is-ask</guid>
						<title>All you have to do is ask.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I had a Dr's appt the other day and it never occured to me before going that we would be discussing my health. MY HEALTH? Simple, I am healthy, I think, in comparison to many many people out there. ...but then, all these questions and I realize, as my Dr. does too, I am not healthy. I am exhausted. SO VERY EXHAUSTED. AND ITS EFFECTS HAVE BEEN SO FAR REACHING....its amazing, when you are in the middle of something, you can't actually see how it looks, or what it means from the outside. So all of this not sleeping, its taken its toll......I know this on many levels but here I am sitting and looking at my Dr, and I can't pretend to be ok with this, I am crying, yes, crying. I am just SO TIRED! And so, like someone finally putting an umbrella up over my head in the middle of a huge rainstorm, my Dr. tells me, step by step and word for word, what I need to do and say to my children in order to ensure uninterupted sleep during the night. To Em,  "Mommy needs her sleep. No milk , no cuddles, cuddles in the morning. When you wake up in the night, Mommy will hug you, cover you, and pat your back, but no milk and no cuddles. In the morning when you wake up, Mommy will say, 'YAY EM, what a good girl'". To Miss P, "Mommy needs her sleep, Mommy is talking to Baby Em about this too...no more waking in the night. We need to sleep all through the night until Mr. Sun comes up, then big cuddles in the morning". According to my Dr,  "It should take two or three nights".
Honestly, who knew? Who knew, that I could just express my needs like that.  Who knew? On the third night, they slept. There was no crying or screaming or long dragged out stand offs. They just understood what I need them to do. And all I had to do, was ask.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=all-you-have-to-do-is-ask</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 21 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-is-thinking</guid>
						<title>Mommy is thinking...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today I was reminded of a conversation I had in the spring, about when I feel closest to God. My answer, without hesitating, was in the company of a child. I saw this truth this morning, as I caught a glimpse in a mirror of my sleeping babe in arms. The reason is simple; in a sleeping child we see peace and trust. The very things we look for in a relationship with God, in Him, we seek peace, from us, He seeks trust.  This is very deep, and I may be rightfully accused of oversimplifying....I thought about writing this, then decided against, but not an hour later, I came across the following quote, "the soul is healed by being with children."
A punctuation mark on my earlier thoughts...perhaps. At any rate, here I am in the company of children and most times I feel that really sacred thing and I am so blessed for it, then, at other times, the more human times, I am stressed, impatient, mentally absent....those are the times when a simple reminder is all my heart needs. I am closest to God in the company of children, in this time with them, my soul is healed, if not transformed. How thankful I am for that.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-is-thinking</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 17 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=she-likes-it-she-really-really-likes-it</guid>
						<title>She likes it, she really really likes it.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[All that worry and anticipation (on my behalf)leading up to Miss P's first days of school....I should have known - SHE LOVES IT! I am pleasantly suprised, I have rarely seen her so high. This same little girl who hid behind my skirt and under my coat for the first 6 1'/2 months of preschool. Even a full day did not phase her. So much to explore, learn, see, and do, wow. I am so happy for her - that she is getting to fly a little on her own. This is new territory and it gives me just a glimpse of the many ways in which my heart and our family will stretch and grow in the year to come. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=she-likes-it-she-really-really-likes-it</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 14 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=i-cried</guid>
						<title>I cried</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today, I cried. My little big girl, Miss P, had her #2 visit for JK. This time it was  a real drop off. We decided beforehand, and joked a little about how we would say goodbye. First a hug, then a kiss, and then the I love you sign.  So there we stood, first a hug, then a kiss,  and though I almost forgot as I was looking around, taking it all in, Miss P remembered. The I love  you sign. Expectantly, she waited,  those big eyes, looking at me, waiting for me to return the sign, so she could take that first big step on her own. I gave the sign, then turned, pushing the stroller around the back of the school. Unexpectedly, my lips began to quiver,then that tense, restrained pull that comes when tears well, next the tears, rolling slowly down my cheeks, nostrils flaring, its happening right now as I write this, just retelling the moment. That moment. Such a milestone and my mind still does not understand why....but my heart does and that is why these tears fall. This process of letting go, it hurts, and these are just baby steps. An hour later, I walked the same path, this time with Miss P at my side.  Once again my emotions suprised me. I asked Miss P how she felt. "I was so excited", she said, "I forgot about my nervous". That made me smile. So if I take a lesson from Miss P, I could say that the joy I take in watching her little wings grow and strengthen, it helps me to forget the tiny little heartaches I have to endure along the way.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=i-cried</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 08 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-simple-question</guid>
						<title>A simple question...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[A simple question asked of me today, had me asking myself a thing or two. "Are you sure you are ok to go back to work in a few weeks?"...that was the question from someone who has seen me through the last year, in all my sleep deprived glory. Someone who hadn't seen me for a couple of months...the wheels of my mind were turning, asking, "am I sure I'm ok...wait, is something wrong with me? oh, she means about going to work, ok about going back to work...soon...maybe she thinks I am still sleep deprived...wait, I am, maybe, maybe, wait, does it show? How does she know that?" Ahhhh a brief look into the thought processes of my brain, that accounted for maybe a second or two. I think too much. And although I answered with the usual, "oh, yeah, uh, it's ok, I don't work that much anyway " (I have NO idea of actually knowing how much I will be working due to downsizing, bumping, and layoffs, coming in November, a month after my return), the simple fact remains, it not about going to work, or even about being physically absent from my girls (I remember that being ever so painful for me after returning from my mat leave with miss p, my eyes well just writing this, remembering how utterly unprepared my heart was for that seperation....) from what I can tell, I will, at least be familiar with those feelings. It's more the head space, which, due to having had two babies in three years, is a little hard to come by. I don't want to open my mind to the rest of the world. To its needs and its demands, not to mention its responsibilities. I move well within the cocoon I have created around myself and my family. I enjoy not having to balance that with anything. Now, I have to turn off this all encompassing, asskicking 24/7 mommy thing, a few times a week, to deal with the public. Please. I am not interested. I would honestly rather be at home washing stinky cloth diapers. (I do so willingly several times a week). So whats a girl to do? Keep an open mind, avoid early starts like the plague, try to see the positives about having to be a person, seperate from all else in my life...or at least to begin, to try remembering how.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-simple-question</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 07 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=jk</guid>
						<title>JK</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Kindergarden is optional, you know." I told my neighbour who was worrying about the undesireable time slot her daughter has been put in for JK at the nearby  Catholic school.  Knowing this, it seems to me that I am in complete denial about the milestone that is approaching, in less than 12 hours. Tomorrow, Miss P goes to meet her JK teacher . What is that?  It can't be. That school thing, that grind of up and out the door, neighbours socializing on the walk there and the walk home. That is not us yet. Summer, over? Who says? We are still a moving team, miss p, emmie lu and mommy too. I am in denial. I have not shopped, labelled, thought about lunches, or routines or anything. I don't want to. I am too busy planning the most amazing craft room in our basement that is now being finished, and sewing blankets and skirts with Miss P on my lap. And there is something else on my mind I might as well speak about. We have a friend who's daughter turned four in January. Miss P is not four until Hallowe'en - so how is it that they are in the same year? How is it fair that she gets almost a whole extra year at home with her girl? I feel robbed. I want my extra 10 months...to be honest, I want more. I am not ready for this. But like a big girl, I will do my best not to let it show. Miss P seems excited and at the end of the day, its not about me. It's silly but on this topic, my heart breaks just a little.. it is no doubt the first of many such breaks.....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=jk</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 02 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=talking-to-god</guid>
						<title>Talking to God...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P, a little girl who is still three, has not been a big fan of saying prayers. She did when she was very small but not so much in the last year. If ever I suggested it, she would always politely decline, asking that we wait until morning to do so....as time passed, I decided to back off and instead let her hear me say the odd prayer of my own, in case she ever wanted something to model after. Today it happened. We had just spotted some fighter jets buzzing over our area while we were playing in a small open park near our home. This little spot is also known as the place where Miss P's favorite rock is. She loves to climb it. (incidentally, I too, had a giant rock like that near my childhood home where I used to climb and sit and think). Needless to say, after spotting the jets, Miss P was overcome with joy and awe. As she walked up behind me, I could hear her speaking and I asked her what she was saying. "I'm praying Mommy," she replied, "about fighter jets, that some day I will be able to fly one". Dumbfounded, I asked, "who are you praying to". "To God, Mommy, I am asking him to let being a fighter jet pilot be one of the gifts in my heart".
She continued, "I just saw those jets and I whispered a quiet prayer, Mommy, to God". Wow. Ok. This is something she obviously feels strongly about. I am imagining her in the Military...I am not quite able to get my mind there and she's off again..."I am going to sit up on my rock, Mommy, and say a prayer to God again".
So there she sat, and it is a picture I won't soon forget, and someday, if she is a fighter jet pilot, I will remember all the more, this vision of my little girl, sitting pretty on a rock in this aproned skirt (sewn for her by me lastnight), mismatched socks and crocs, so tiny on this giant rock, praying over and over again that she could become a fighter jet pilot one day (and also, if He were so inclined, to allow Mommy and Daddy and Emmie a ride with her).  There is nothing in recent conversations that I can think of which lead her to the notion that praying to God about something she really wished for in her heart, was a way to will some kind of realization of hope into her little world. She came to that conclusion on her own, with help from someone other than me.

]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=talking-to-god</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 28 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommys-growing-up-too</guid>
						<title>Mommy's growing up too...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I don't know what's happenned or when or how...but I have started sewing. I feel all grown up. I want to make clothes for my girls (well for miss p to start as em has ALLLLL the clothes a baby could handle right now). I am so inspired to do this, and what I have found is that with every stich and pin and ironed seam (I HATE IRONING, but do so willingly now that I am sewing), there is a love pouring out of my heart that I would normally only know how to share with hugs and kisses, words (written) or sometimes just tears...sounds silly. But wow. it is true for me. And suddenly now, I understand and appreciate all the more, the things my mother lovingly made for me. How thankful I am for that.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommys-growing-up-too</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 23 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-naked-bandit</guid>
						<title>...the naked bandit</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Baby Em likes to protest, loudly, in her crib, at all hours. In the morning, we kind of tip toe around, listen at the door and get to her when she gets to us with her little voice, carrying through the walls and down the halls. The other morning, all was quiet, and Miss P and I were awake. Since baby em had given mommy many wake up calls all night, she was still silent...In a rare moment of morning quiet, Miss p sat on my lap watching some great jet footage on you tube. Then we heard her....that little monkey in her room next door. We finished the video clip and in we went. At first, all I noticed when I opened the door, was the sun shining through the blinds, the pile of blankets and sheets on the floor, and two little hands curled around the top of the crib rail, her tiny little face peeking over at the mess below. "AH," I thought to myself, "she's tossed her blankie overboard..." but at the same time, something else occurred to me...those little tanned hands were attached to tanned, bare arms, attached to a tanned bare body, which meant, there in the crib, stood a tanned, BARE NAKED BABY!!!..."Wait a minute?! Something is wrong with this picture", I thought, as I noticed her sleeper and diaper in the pile on the floor. And then I laughed in a way that I have many times lately, in reaction to the silly and funny things baby em does! She is a clown.....and a naked bandit.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-naked-bandit</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 21 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=its-about-the-heart</guid>
						<title>Its about the heart...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today is my birthday, which has nothing to do with my intended entry. The question came to me in the car (as usual).Looking into the sky, Miss P asked, "Mommy, will you miss me when I am grown up and away flying my jet?". In case you missed the update, Miss P is REALLY INTO JETS. We have spent a great deal of time on You tube, watching amazing jet footage (as the bombs dropped from one jet, miss P exclaimed, "ahhhh look at the baby jets...") She now has F-14, F-18 and Snowbird postcards propped up on the shelves in her room.
According to her ( in the same conversation), she "will like jets for longer than she likes the fiddle"...why the sudden inclination, well, without prompting, she had an answer for that too, you see, its all about the heart.  According to Miss P, when her heart was done loving fiddles, it told her to love fighter jets next. So, loving fighter jets, for MIss P, was simply a matter of "listening to her heart". The things this little soul comes up with and thinks and feels. She is something. Something very special to me. So to answer her question, "yes Miss P," (eyes misting up as I look into the future, imagining being the mother of a beautiful, grown up, fighter jet pilot daughter..."I will definately miss you when you are away flying your fighter jet, and I will no doubt worry, but chances are, if you are in fact away flying a fighter jet, I will be so incredibly proud of you, it will offset the missing part..."
Look out Top Gun, here comes MIss P.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=its-about-the-heart</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 20 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-new-response</guid>
						<title>A new response...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Lately, Emmy lu's personality is off the charts...she is a menace. Into it all, fast, observant, determined...I know its not just me. Strangers comment on how she keeps me on my toes. :) So this little mischief making, speedball of a baby does the funniest thing. It started the other day at my mom and dads when she refused to nap (this never happens!) ...as I stood over her in the crib, taking note of all the blankets and stuffies piled on the floor (thrown overboard by you know who), clucking with dissatisfaction at her attempt to boycott naptime, I told her, "Baby Em, it's time for na-na's, its time to go to sleep." To which she replied, very seriously with a little crinkly brow, and emphatic head shaking....."ohhhh, nnnoooohhh."
She says it without the gusto and emotion that will no doubt come at age two. She says it as if she's not really sure that the sound is actually coming out of her mouth, low and even-toned but with certainty. Nap time? Nnnnnnooooohhhhhh.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-new-response</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 16 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-how-do-babies-get-in-your-tummy</guid>
						<title>Mommy, how do babies get in your tummy?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Asleep in bed one morning, Miss P, lay beside me, snuggling.  Then she began to speak.
"Mommy, do you remember that I told you I want a baby named Tracy someday?"...."mmhmm" I mumble, still half asleep. "well, when do you think that baby might be coming?" she said, expectantly. 
"well, I'm pretty sure it won't be," I answer, eyes still closed, sleepy as can be. "Mommy," she persisted, "how do babies get in your tummy?". I am awake now. "They, uh, they grow, Miss P, like a flower and most living things, they start out like a tiny seed, and they grow. " And then, her reply, which really woke me up.... "I didn't ask HOW they GROW, Mommy, I asked, how do they get IN your tummy..."
I am so awake now. Cautiously (and lamely I might add) I proceed..."Miss P, it takes love, and hope, hope that someday, one of the gifts in my heart would be a baby." hmmm, what did I just say? That's pretty lame,but she is just 3 1/2, and she's not asking anymore questions. She never ceases to amaze me, that little mind never rests, and her sensors are out, everyday. She desires a directness I was never even aware of as a child, and demands it, which even as an adult, makes me slightly uncomfortable. Yet, the frank conversations we have, already at this stage, give my heart hope that we can continue an open and honest dialogue regardless of the topic.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-how-do-babies-get-in-your-tummy</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 14 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=yeyo-wiwies</guid>
						<title>Yeyo Wiwies</title>
						<description><![CDATA[So, Miss P was sitting at the table the other day, chatting away....she is such a talker (comes by it honestly) and its the cutest thing. Although she has been talking in full sentances since she was not quite 18months, there are little things in her speech that still need to develop. For example, she says "Ife" instead of knife, and 
"yeyo" instead of yellow. The other day, she said, "Nanny, look at our yeyo wiwies", and after eating lunch, my mom asked, "what are you doing miss p?" to which she responded, "I'm wicking my wips". I asked her, while we sat at the table, if she thought she might be able to say LoLLipop...she tried but couldn't and didn't seem discouraged at all. I told her, to be sure, that some day, her little tongue would all of a sudden find the right spot in her mouth to make the L sound. Bless her heart, the next day, after I put baby em down for a nap, I heard a little voice as I came down the stairs. Over and over ,that little voice was repeating, "yeLLow, yeLLow, yeLLow". With a smile from ear to ear and full of excitement and pride, Miss P proudly announced that she could say L! "Imagine that," she said, "all of a sudden, my tongue learned how."
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=yeyo-wiwies</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 13 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=hey-diddle-diddle</guid>
						<title>Hey diddle diddle...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Ever see that show four squares? The ones who sing that annoying, "tikka tikka tikka tikka tee tee ta, I've got a rhythm wanna share with ya!" Well now I understand. Tikka, tee and ta, all represent various nots in rhythm. So for example, for homework each night of music camp, Miss P had to clap such things as "ta tee tee ta", and "tikka tikka tee tee", and on the last day, move the bow across the fiddle to the beat of "tikka tikka tee tee". Though we went into the idea of fiddling lessons with great enthusiasm, it seems, all we are left with three weeks later, besides an ever so tiny violin (being returned tomorrow), is a fun game of clapping, banging, and stomping out various rhythms in various ways on various objects. Not bad, as my gut really told me that at 3 1/2, the novelty of learning the fiddle might give way to the demands of daily practice, cd listening time and rhythm clapping.  Not to mention a time commitment of a half hour lesson every week and a one hour group lesson every other week. Yo Yo Ma, she ain't. Nor do I want her to be. I just wanted to introduce her to something she begged to do for more than a year. I don't want to send the wrong message, try everything, stick with nothing. But I also don't want to enter into something that will surely cause so much conflict at such an early stage. The people were amazing and loving and talented. Miss P learned amazing things about music theory (yes, believe it!) and loved EVERY minute of it. Staffs, lines, spaces, musical alphabets, half notes, whole notes, ta's and tee tee's. If this was a school in which we could register for a complete education, I'd have signed, dotted and paid my deposit. But its not. And miss p, my little one who is still three, is about to start JK. Two whole days every week, three whole days, every other week. It will be such an adjustment time. So, for now, we shall wait until spring to rexamine her desire to play the fiddle, we'll plan on attending camp next summer and in the mean time, we'll focus on ta's and tee tee's and listening to others play the fiddle instead!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=hey-diddle-diddle</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 12 Aug 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=one-derful-you</guid>
						<title>One-derful you</title>
						<description><![CDATA[What to say about little baby lu....she is busy and funny and grumpy and frustrated, with a mind made up back arching, body throwing determination that will serve her well someday. She is goofy and serious and sensitive. She tries to make her sister laugh, studies me carefully when I am upset, or angry or stressed. She makes kissy sounds if she hears a child cry, smacks her lips at the sight of a bottle (or my chest). She whacks her head (her own version of the sign for airplane) anytime she hears an engine sound and knowingly laughs anytime anyone sneezes, burps or toots...She is my dolly babe, my mama's girl, my fearless, fiesty, firecracker. She listens to me, when I tell her "no", but always tries again, just in case I didn't mean it. It goes by so quickly, and so it is with great purpose that I hold her, just a little longer each night, as she melts into me, her little sleeping face, taking on a greater resemblence to the infant she was just this time last year. What a thrill it is to watch her grow into this amazing and unique little personality that is all her own. You are exactly as you are meant to be, there is no one else like you,  unique and special and One-derful, my one-derful emmy lu.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=one-derful-you</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 29 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=blue-point</guid>
						<title>Blue Point</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We hit the road this past week for a couple of days and nights in Sarnia visiting Great Grandma and family friends at their cottage on Blue Point. It was fun and busy and tiring and not as bad as I thought it would be regarding sleeping arrangements. Miss P slept like a champ and even baby em did no worse than she might have at home, better even in some respects. All that fresh air and swimming and sand and playing.....both girls were talking in their sleep and no doubt dreaming about the fun days they were having. Miss P was actually talking away about the interactions of the day and baby Em was laughing and giggling, and jibber jabbering too. It so cute. Whenever we do these kinds of get aways, I always wish we could stay longer, go more often, freeze....in place, right where we are. On vacation, I am a better version of myself. Not weighed down by the duties of cooking and cleaning and laundry and phone calls and computer and DISTRACTIONS. On vacation there are no distractions, just us and our girls and time. Sweet time. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=blue-point</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 28 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=peanut-free</guid>
						<title>Peanut free</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Daddy stood (fully clothed), towel in hand, waiting for miss p to exit the shower. As she stepped out she looked at Daddy and said, rather nonchalently, "Daddy, you have a peanut". He looked at me, I looked at him and grinned....Miss P continued, "and I have a Bagina, mommy has a bagina, baby em has a bagina AND NANNY HAS A BAGINA", then as she peered out from the towel, she added, for emphasis, in case we missed it the first time, "but Daddy has a peanut".
I think she's got that one all figured out.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=peanut-free</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 20 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=heartstrings</guid>
						<title>Heartstrings</title>
						<description><![CDATA[On Miss P's last day of school, her voice came from the backseat like a song. "Mommy", she paused, "today, a little girl is going to play the fiddle at my school". " I know Miss P, are't you excited that you get to see the fiddle?" (She LOVES the fiddle ever since she first saw Baby Einstein's Old MacDonald...has asked to learn it when she gets bigger, can recognize any Alan Jackson song by the sound of the fiddle, regardless of the volume level, or if she has ever heard that song before!!!)
We continued on in silence for a bit, mine an exhausted, sleepless night kind of silence, hers, a contemplative one...and then these words came out of her mouth...
"Mommy, it is my deepest wish in my heart to play the fiddle". 
I don't even think I responded. I think I picked up the phone, called her Daddy, to share that sweet and mature moment with him....then later that day, I picked up my phone and called the nearest Suziki School of Music. 
How is that for playing on heartstrings?]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=heartstrings</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 14 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-things</guid>
						<title>Mommy things...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P, Emmie and Mommy were all in the playroom this morning. Having fun. Me at the computer, Miss P bouncing on the bed (even though the trampoline is right there beside it) and Baby Em was climbing up and tummy sliding down the slide castle. 
When it came time to think about moving downstairs, I said, "Miss P, we have to get going..." To that she replied, "I'm just gonna stay here and I'm gonna do Mommy things..." "Mommy things!?" I said, "what kinds of things are Mommy things???" 
"oh," she said with polished nonchalence, "computer, high bounces on the floor (???), go for a ride on the train, go to work on a plane, that's all". 
Hmmm. Mommy things. That's all.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-things</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 03 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=cows</guid>
						<title>Cows</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Oh, Mommy", came her voice from the back seat....
"Look at those dark brown cows..."
"Mmhmm", I replied vaguely, thinking, why won't she fall asleep, I've taken the long way home I am on some country road we have not been on in ages and......
"I think those must be chocolate milk cows...." said Miss P.
Smiling, I asked, "Why do you think,  Miss P?". 
"Oh, because they are dark brown, so their milk must be chocolate".
Thinking to myself, so cute and clever, I answer, 
"Must be, Miss P, must be."
:)]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=cows</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 02 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=times-they-are-changing</guid>
						<title>Times, they are changing</title>
						<description><![CDATA[What is it? Why do I find it to be so unjust yet equally delightful, watching my children (and other peoples children) grow? Miss P is going to JK in the fall?! What is that? I went to the orientation a couple of weeks ago. Its so big and she is so small, and unique and mine....I feel so conflicted about letting her go...yet I know I must....and as I write, I know I will feel this way forever about every milestone. It is terrifying yet necessary to go along with this letting go process. Now. Already. And continously for the rest or her life and mine. In a way, I suppose, I am already letting go with Baby Em, standing back and holding my breath as she stumbles around outside, certain that a mouth guard and helmet could not ease my worry. But I have to accept that it is my job, as Mommy, to give them wings (confidence, unconditional love,  and encouragement) so that they can fly (succeed). And though it feels contrary to everything my heart wants. (My heart wants to tuck them under my wing forever, to protect them from mean girls and boys in general. From hurt feelings and superficial judgements from people who are no authority on anything, except perhaps, what Hannah Montanna does in her spare time.)  On the other hand, I feel thrilled and delighted when Baby Em shows us yet another new trick....signing please, blowing her nose, jibbering in super cute baby babble, endeared, when Miss P decides to play "JK" in her back yard, running through the sprinkler, just as the kindergarden kids did yesterday, while we watched from the park. I suppose that's how it is with most things when we overcome those voices fighting progress, growth, and change. It hurts our hearts, but the reward for the discomfort of the stretch is in the pride we feel as we move forward.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=times-they-are-changing</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 25 Jun 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=enjoy-the-moment</guid>
						<title>Enjoy the moment</title>
						<description><![CDATA[All this talk about what could have been and should have been, I can be a real debbie downer some days. Some days, Mommy just wishes she was perfect, or mabye that more days were like those perfect days, when everything falls in to place and all feels well with the world. But how would I learn and stretch and grow, and change? How would I evolve into a better Mommy, if not for those 'bad Mommy moments'? One thing I do know, in reflecting on the year so far, is that as 2008 arrived, I realized that Baby Em, was growing up so fast, as was the evolving and maturing Miss P! This graced my very being with a deeper patience and made me all the more determined to kiss and cuddle and read stories, and gobble up chunky thighs and cheeks and belly buttons. Oh how I love to do that. And with Miss P, to be more patient, to choose my battles, to let go of some expectations (no more nap, still sucking on sussy...) Oh how I love to elicit smiles and laughter from both girls....how I love when Miss P cups her hands around my cheeks after some quality Mommy and P time, gazing into my eyes professing a deep unconditional love. Its so simple, sometimes, most times, actually, if I let it be. Still, I'll catch myself, serious and intent on the task at hand, only to look into expectant eyes, expressionless, trying to figure out what on earth their Mommy is doing, why it is more important than stories, or crafts, or watching bugs, and when (if ever) she might put down the vaccum, the dishcloth, the phone, to come and play. If nothing else, these reflections keep me focused no the moments that are fleeting and remind me of how I have to persist in actively seizing each day, I think I do well at this, I think I am hard on myself (as many other entries reveal) but without this self monitoring, the call of 'grown up things to do' can really get in the way of being the kind of Mommy I want to be. (for my girls)]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=enjoy-the-moment</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 17 Jun 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=buh-buh-buh</guid>
						<title>Buh Buh Buh</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Last weekend we had Miss P's class pet come and spend a few nights at our house. It was no trouble really and it thrilled Miss P, our very own animal rescuer in ways I cannot explain. Each morning she waited anxiously as Daddy let Tommy out of his cage in the front hall for exercise, (while mommy held her breath and dumped shavings and poo and paper into a bag on the porch). She delighted in petting him, singing for him, watching him hop and do his thing. She doted over him with plates of lettuce and apple. Baby Em loved it too, hanging over the gate in the front hall on her tippy toes, saying, "Buh, buh, buh", giggling and toddling to the front hall when we asked her if she wanted to see the bunny. She even looked for him a couple of days after  he returned to his classroom home. Fun stuff. Kids and pets. I tried not to mind the smell too much, or the fact that my eyes watered and throat itched from the time he arrived in our home. The things we do for our little ones. I'd take Tommy again, but the closest thing to a pet we'll be getting in the near future will be a goldfish!
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=buh-buh-buh</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 12 Jun 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=to-my-delight-and-sorrow</guid>
						<title>To my delight and sorrow</title>
						<description><![CDATA[As I held a friends newborn in my arms the other day, tears welled up in my eyes. Just one year ago, I had one of those tiny little gifts in my own arms, all mine to cherish and nurture and hold. Where did the time go? How could I have lost sight of the fact that this newness, this most fresh and fleeting stage would be so short lived. I can't even remember it. Why didn't I hold her more, gaze at her longer, smell her little head and memorize the way it felt to be gifted something so unspeakably wonderful, and overwhelmingly precious, from none other than God himself. I have a hard time with time in general. The good parts go by so quickly the foggy not so good times seem to drag on a take on a life  all of their own. Its not that I think I have done a poor job this past year. I think I have done my best and sometimes my best was not what I would have liked it to be. I have learned lots, especially that one year ago I was totally unequipped to become a mother of two. I didn't have the slightest plan. Realistically, who does? I am ok with all of this, for the most part, as we got by and I can honestly feel in my own heart the changes I have undergone and the growth that has taken place as a result. There is a peace that was not there before and I like it. Every so often, like now, for example, when it is so obvious that there are no "do overs", I get caught up in what could have been, how it should have been, where I could have done things differently, coped better, worried less. This can be a negative cycle, as it robs today of its joys, successes, stresses well mangaed, tempers and reactions kept in check. It can also be positive because it reminds me of how mindfully I need to approach my days and my time spent with these beautiful little girls sent to me, to open my heart, to shed light into the not so good parts, to celebrate the great parts,  to teach me and challenge me and to bring me untold joys.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=to-my-delight-and-sorrow</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 10 Jun 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=hop-little-bunny-hop-hop-hop</guid>
						<title>Hop little bunny, Hop Hop Hop</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Stop little bunny, stop stop stop. On second thought, don't stop baby bunny, you are being chased by a giant baby human, a three and a half year old Miss P, hopping madly after you, through the garden, arms at chest level, channelling her best bunny.
We have baby bunnies in our garden. We discovered them yesterday. Two have permanently vacated their formerly, safe, secure little burrow (which Miss P finally located this evening beneath a perennial geranium) I watched in awe over the course of the last day, as she patiently searched the garden, peeking in each bush, plant and flower for signs of bunnies or their burrow. I even commended her for her work. For being so thorough, searching for the burrow. As I watched her crouching low, gloves on, gently moving leaves and pine needles on her search, I thought that perhaps she might be the offspring of the croc hunter or some other well known animal/creature lover. Amazing. 
She named each of them. Baby buba, Baby tum tum and Baby "Fumfum" (that is baby thumb thumb) Until this morning, only baby thumb thumb was left. That is until she  naughtily chased the bunny right out of our yard, opening the gate and going out front, while my back was turned, without my knowledge for at least a few good minutes.
She was so relieved when she and Daddy found him again tonight, hiding frightened (I can only imagine) behind our air conditioner. Miss P, apparently chased him back into our yard.
But the fun and games ended as I ran to cries from the garden, where Miss P sat wailing on the step, where Dad had planted her after she chased and caught the remaining baby bunny, running through the garden with him in her hands (gloves off). Even Daddy looked disturbed at how the baby bunny had cried out. Miss P, apparently had not yielded to anything Mommy had explained to her earlier about not touching, not scaring, and keeping safe, the bunnies. Hopefully baby Thumb thumb will be well cared for tonight by his maman, and will not be kicked out of their cozy little burrow for bringing the scent of Miss P into their tiny little bunny world.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=hop-little-bunny-hop-hop-hop</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 30 May 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-month-in-review</guid>
						<title>A month in review</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Oh, the days pass by and there are so many blanks to fill in, like Baby Em's first birthday and her love for all things Mickey Mouse. The way she walked from one end of the room to the other on her big day and has not stopped since. Then the "plague" that struck Miss P and I, first her for a week and then me...an ear infection for Baby Em, teamed with pink eye for me. Fun Stuff. I was rendered useless for an entire week....a not so gentle reminder of how vital health is in the daily equation...how sometimes, if we can't yield in our lives, our bodies do it for us. Most of all, it was  a reminder of  how blessed we are to have family to support us when we are down. 

Next we had a special visit with Great Grandma and Uncle Brian. She brought Miss P the most amazing book, called You are Special, By Max Lucado.  It is a book that shares the most beautiful message that I hope we read together for a long time. 
Next was an amazing visit with Uncle S and Auntie L. For Miss P and even Emilie, it had to be a equivalent to a weekend escape -we hit all of our favorite summer spots, Springridge farm, Spencer Smith Park, and even the Play barn at Bronte Creek. We had so much fun. And this weekend, its June.  What a month. We are all looking forward to June, its lazy summer days, and hopefully germ free living...no doubt there will be lots more fun in store.  ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-month-in-review</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 30 May 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=on-our-toes</guid>
						<title>On our toes</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Baby Em is at it one week after her first birthday and she is moving and grooving and propelling herself through the space that is our home. Her legs out wide and arms in the air, she's moving from one end of the house to the other on two legs instead of all fours. She is so determined and so proud ...have I mentionned that she has the craziest temper???
I feel a sense of responsibility for  that temperment, she screams and growls and shakes, fist clenched over just about everything. So what was initially a fun and casual attempt to teach her sign language, has now become quite a deliberate attempt to help reduce the frustration she feels by opening her eyes (and hands) to a more effective way to communicate. It started with "milk" and is mostly centred around "more"... it is her communication gateway. Most recently she is signing "doggy". The first time she did this, later that night as she lay in my arms, she looked at me with wide but just awake eyes, and enthusiastically did the sign for "doggy". It was as if she was saying, "see, Mommy, I didn't forget!". Now, she sits and looks through her books, stopping to sign "doggy" each time she sees one. Yesterday she hesitated over a photo of a wolf. She paused, turned the page, paused again, turned back, stared at the picture and signed "doggy" with an expression that said, at first I was stumped, but now I am sure. This is a dog, and I can tell you with my little hands that I know that.  ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=on-our-toes</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 08 May 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-year-later</guid>
						<title>A year later....</title>
						<description><![CDATA[This is what I wrote, one year ago tonight....and what I wrote a year later....

Dear Baby Em, 

On the eve of your birth, what can I say? I though you might surprise us in the middle of the night…every night for the past three weeks! It is very surreal to know definitively that tomorrow is the day we will all get to meet you. We have this lovely little family all ready to receive you….everyone is excited. Did you know that your big sister, Miss P, has chosen your name???
Its going to be a whole new chapter for us all. For now, I can say that we are all praying for your safe and healthy arrival. 
On a softer note, I am so curious to meet you – what will you be like? Will you look like Daddy or Mommy, or Miss P? Will you have my red hair? My eyes? I think you will have your sister’s nose (mine) and your Daddy’s chin, from what I could see on the ultrasounds. 
Above all – I hope that you are well and healthy and ready to meet your first day of life, knowing already there are so many who love you and can’t wait to watch you grow.

With Love, 
Mommy 

Dear Baby Em, 

You are going to be one tomorrow! Where does a year go? In ways it seems like an eternity, but when I consider how time passes I know with just a hint of sorrow, how short a time this is, when you are my babe in arms. You are quite a girl. Persistent, like your sister, crackly like your Mommy and observant like your Daddy. You are a monkey and a wiggle worm, and a little imp who knows when Mommy is catching you doing something you shouldn’t be doing. You want to go so badly and are working hard at walking – you are so determined – practice makes perfect little Emmie Lu and it won’t be long for you. You are grumbling next door as usual (you didn’t turn out to be sleeper but you have my nose and your Daddy’s chin).
So I am off to scoop you up out of your crib to quiet your protests and to feed you some milk before I turn in for the night (a couple of hours, anyway). 
How I love you so my Dolly baby! How did Mommy get so lucky to have not just one beautiful little girl, but two, you and your sister are the lights of my life, you lift my heart and make it happy nomatter how grey the skies. 
Love you always, 
Xo Mommy


]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-year-later</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 30 Apr 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=maybe-it-was-me</guid>
						<title>Maybe it was me....?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[So its been a couple of weeks since the incident I am about to write about took place. A good thing as my strong feelings about it would have no doubt overcome me had I tried to write about it before now, not to mention that I have been opting for early nights (bedtime 9:30ish except for Monday's when I shamelessly watch The Hills) It seems to be working, my head is clearer and we are all getting a little more sleep. 
Now to the topic at hand. There are three little girls, Miss P included, all within weeks of one another on our street. Miss P and another girl play or see one another at least once a week, a few weeks a month, more when the weather is nice. The third little girl, not so much. On this day, the three were all together playing outside, Miss P being the late joiner.
Shocked, I watched as the third little one purposefully and relentlessly thwarted any of Miss P's attempts to engage her in all ways. She refused to listen, verbally acknowledge or physically share space and  make eye contact with Miss P. Her mother was not there at that point but her grandmother was. It made me uncomfortable and  a little sad as Mama bear to watch this, but it also suprised me in a way I cannot explain. I spend a lot of time in the company of those under the age of four. I well know how they (my own included) can be amazingly unbending and self centred, but I honestly had never seen anything like this. What amazed me more was Miss P's grace and quiet persistence with this child who appeared to have spent the last three years of her life locked up with older girls at a sleep over studying a copy of "Mean Girls". It wasn't just that I am Mommy, the mother of the second girl actually spoke to me about it the next day, as her husband and her had been discussing how nothing seems to bother Miss P, and how such treatment would have had their own little three year old in tears. 
Not the case though...I mean the part about it not bothering Miss P.
As we left the house that day, I briefly acknowledged what had gone on, saying, "Maybe someone was having a bad day?" To which Miss P replied very quietly and with her head bowed low (not typical for her), "well Mommy, maybe it was me?". Wow, that tugged at my heart in a way that I cannot explain. "oh honey," I said, "no it wasn't you. You were being a good girl, you did the right things, trying to be kind, if someone decides to treat you in a way that is not nice, it isn't because of you, its because of them, and maybe they are just having a bad day."
We didn't talk about it again, we had a great dinner and play time and special Mommy and P time after Baby Em went to sleep, then, after bath and stories and snacks and cuddles, Miss P, whispered, as she turned over to go to sleep, "Mommy I don't want her to be not nice to me again, maybe we should go and talk to her." To that I replied, "if someone makes you feel bad, you can tell them, and if they still treat you badly you don't have to play with them, but however they treat you, it isn't because of you, it is because of them, you be yourself, you be kindhearted just like your teachers tell Mommy you are, and you just don't worry about the rest."
It is not a conversation I expected to have with my three year old . The protectiveness I feel from deep within my heart and very being that her beautiful little spirit not be crushed by mean girls is overwhelming. I know I can't shelter her from it all, but how I wish to build a little cushion around that heart, so it does not get damaged, so that careless thoughtful others don't eat away at who she is. It is not in my hands, but I can pray so hard for that kind of knowing and confidence in her own heart. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=maybe-it-was-me</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 29 Apr 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=so-proud</guid>
						<title>So proud</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P received an unexpected gift from our neighbour last week, as he was clearing out his garage to make a trip to the dump. His eldest, now a "big girl" was moving into a bigger bike and he wanted to know if Miss P might like to inherit the still sparkly, girly 12 inch frame bike with training wheels. Oddly, that morning, Daddy and I had discussed buying just such a thing for our little big girl. With a quick tune up and a trip to Canadian tire to buy a basket (so that blue lamb could ride shot gun), the bike was on the road again. At first there were some frustrated tears and an inclination towards her old trike, but eventually she has come to love her bike and riding is a highlight in her day. She sits up so tall and so proud, and she is determined to get it right, though sometimes she still forgets and pedals backwards. It makes me think of the expression, "just like riding a bike". I have always taken this to mean that something is a "no brainer" but as I watch Miss P learning to ride, and I ponder the meaning of this expression, I wonder if it might actually imply that there is a required determination, not only in learning something new, but also in staying the course on something you have known for as long as you can remember.  Perhaps there is no such thing as a "no brainer". As with many things in our lives, bike riding included, we oftentimes find ourselves back pedalling. So it seems, that as long as we remember to get our feet turning and to keep our momentum, in theory , it should all come back to us. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=so-proud</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 17 Apr 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=trying_2</guid>
						<title>Trying</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Baby em is not such a baby anymore, but she is to me, such a babe to me. She melts into my arms when she wants to be cuddled, I bury my face in hers, smell her, and kiss her and hold her, knowing how short this beautiful baby time is. She is so spunky, yet so chill, and so determined, she might even give Miss P a run for her determination - as like me , Miss P tends to get frustrated and erupt into tears, Baby em on the otherhand, stays the course....her short fuse seems to be getting longer! 
Over the last week or so, she has taken one step, on a couple of occasions and after initially looking suprised about what she has done, she defaults to her knees and gets on with things. Today, she took two very deliberate steps. She is on to something. I wouldn't mind if she deliberated a while longer....just a little while longer.....that would be just fine.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=trying_2</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 06 Apr 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=kisses</guid>
						<title>Kisses</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Well," said Miss P as I snuggled in to her at bedtime, giving her a little kiss, "what is that smell in your breath, Mommy?" "Oh" I said, "sorry, its probably a bit of garlic from my salad", "well," continued Miss P, "you should never kiss someone when you have a garlic smell in your breath - it tastes stinky", "you're right," I say, guiltily, "AND", she continues, "you should never kiss someone with pasta breath cause that tastes salty...you should only kiss with flower kisses, they taste sweet". Then,  with a big, squinty smile and  lips puckered like a cute little guppy, Miss P, planted a sweet little flower kiss right on my lips, then twice for good measure. Out of respect (and gratitude for her unconditional show of affection), I kept my lips shut tight, so I wouldn't wilt those little flowery kisses with my dragony garlic breath.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=kisses</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 30 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=words</guid>
						<title>Words</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I love how honest words flow freely from Miss P's mouth. There is no thought or consciousness about if I say this or ask that, what will they think? Words and thoughts come out as they are meant to be, simple and uncomplicated....like last night as I left Miss P's room, she called for my attention, "MOMMY!"..."yes", I said or maybe just suggested with my body language...and then a whisper..."you're my sweetheart". A sweet thing to say and to hear. Funny as it is not an expression I use, yet the way she spoke those words, she clearly meant to whisper them with all the tenderness and love a three year old heart can muster (which, I think is probably more than the average adult heart can do, as my three year old's heart is not wrapped in layers of hurt, doubt, self consciousness judgement and self abuse). 
A gentle little reminder wrapped up in a sweet loving whisper, that words can do so much, as a means to hurt or to help or in this instance, as a big squeezy hug from a dolly to her mommy.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=words</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 25 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-maple-suuugar-bush</guid>
						<title>The maple SUUUgar bush</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We went last Sunday to Mountsburg, to the maple sugar festival - or as Miss P refers to it, the maple SUUUgar bush. We went last year and it was a big hit and this year was no exception. It was a great day for it, play barn, baby lambs, licking sap as it poured from the trees and more than one trip through the sugar shack for a tasty maple sugar candy. The highlight was a sleighride (sitting right behind the horses), and as Miss P found out, one of the horses shared something very special in common with her - her name!!! Baby em was such a good girl, all bundled and hanging from the sling - with an arrowroot cookie hanging out of her mouth, she barely complained at all! I think this will be an annual tradition as it was a fun day had by all with the promise of spring around the corner....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-maple-suuugar-bush</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 21 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=itchy-nose-knows</guid>
						<title>Itchy nose, Knows</title>
						<description><![CDATA["I know what the problem is..."said Miss P, at bedtime,  as she wiggled and twitched her nose...."its that I'm going to kiss a fool"....with that, she leaned forward, with her suss still in her mouth and planted a big one, right on my lips. She learned that silly expression from me. She means no disrespect, she doesn't know what a fool is, but in this case, she has her context downpat. The definition of a fool, is one lacking in judgement or prudence, prudence being the ability to govern oneself by the use of reason. As a sleep deprived Mommy, given to occasional though incresingly more common fits of impatience and unreasonable steam blowing, she couldn't be more accurate in her description of me. I am not ok with this, of course, but it is my reality. To put some perspective on just how sleep deprived I am, I may have had a total of 24 hours sleep in six days - never more than 2 hours at a time. Often with long stetches of wakefulness until about 5am.
There is a line in a song that keeps running through my mind tonight. It says, "you don't always have to hold your head, higher than your heart". 
Knowing that my  ability to reason is off, maybe its best if I let my head go for a while (why fight it?) and tune into my heart instead. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=itchy-nose-knows</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 12 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-pat-my-back</guid>
						<title>Mommy, pat my back...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Tonight Mommy is tired with nerves a little frayed, even as I begin to type, I am looking at the clock in the corner of my screen, I should be asleep, but then, when do I get to stop and think about all the sweetness, to take the edge off?
Baby Em, is giving me a run for my money, while spunky and naughty and funny and cute (and fully aware of all of these things), she is going through something right now.....teeth or ears or seperation or a likely combination of the two. So when she is not being cute or entertaining for strangers, family, or her sister, she is protesting loudly and constantly at me 24/7! Yikes! The rest of the time, she makes me laugh and melts my heart and makes me wish I could hold her as a baby in my arms forever! That's right I said it, even though I am sleep deprived and weary, I still would not let this time in my life go. Ahhhh, which reminds me, the present confict in my heart has me trying to figure out if I should ask for forgiveness for my hot moments of impatience or for being too hard on myself under the current circumstances....? 
Miss P has been a ray of sunshine more than the usual as she has discovered the reward of the pride she feels when being helpful with Emilie...she makes her laugh, distracts her and advocates for what it is she thinks her griping sister wants! But my favorites today were how it started and ended with Miss P, a warm lazy snuggle in my bed, after the sun had come up, and while baby em was sleeping peacefully....and at bedtime, (the second time she was up and out), Miss P said, pleading for more back rubs, "Mommy, give me the best pats in your heart". Always. Promise, even when I am grouchy and tired and impatient, I will reserve the best pats in my heart, for you and your baby terrorist, I mean sis.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-pat-my-back</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 04 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=perspective</guid>
						<title>Perspective</title>
						<description><![CDATA[and crafty and clever and imaginative and busy and such a selective listener. I have not taken the time to write her goings on as sleep has been a primary concern and I think I will remember and then, she says or does something else and I forget...come to think of it, I realize that I forget most of the last ten months, I am hoping some day those memories will resurface, once I have restored my sleep debt and become a member of sociery who's body actually has a circadian rhythm.
What I do know is that Miss P, though fast paced and relentless in her pursuit of a new activity/thought/snack/idea every five minutes, keeps me hopping, in a good way, I just don't always have the eyes to see that. As I was sternly frowning at her last night she broke the ice by popping her suss out of her mouth, asking if she could make a funny face so I could smile....she helps me bake and bring groceries in and sort socks (sortof), she takes her diaper off at night when its wet and comes into my room, waking me and looking for a new one, she gets to the bathroom on time (most times) and strips her clothes off without any struggle (its putting them on that seems to be a challenge). She asks thought provoking questions, like why do Mommies have hair on their legs (a reminder that I need to shave them more often), and comes up with innovative ideas for solving family issues such as where mommy shoudl be at bedtim,  "well, we could just take your  milk with the pump and put it in a sippy and give it to daddy and he could feed emmie and you could be with me..."....that could work. The insight and view of the world from a three year old perspective is simple, genuine and full of wonder.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=perspective</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 27 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=watching-my-girls-grow</guid>
						<title>Watching my girls grow</title>
						<description><![CDATA[As I watch them grow, I want to know, will I always feel this way? Its not as though I am missing all the moments, but sometimes it just seems that time is moving faster than my mind or body or even my heart can keep pace with. Suddenly, I am looking back on three years of photos and videos of Miss P, and the better part of a year with baby em and I can taste, smell and feel the way it all was then, but what about now? How can it be that at least 50% of the time, I am numb to the present? I try not to take it for granted, I try to drink up what I can. I just have this feeling that I am failing. Each day, I breath silent prayers, so thankful that they are here with me, in this life, to bring me joy and to teach me and above all, just to bless me with their presence. I remember that feeling I had, when Miss P was brand new and again with baby em, it was like, "you mean I get to keep her with me, to hug and hold and kiss ? wow." So why do I feel torn, either there could never be enough of these moments, or I could never be enough to properly capture, cherish, and savour them?Something as simple and daily as "ignoring" baby em to give miss p some attention, and then banishing miss p while I feed baby em, makes me feel this way. Maybe its just me feeling melancholy. I suspect that if anyone who really knows me at this stage in my life were to offer up an answer, they'd remind me of just how little sleep I have had, of the mastitis and simply of the nature of life. We can't be all things to all people, but why do I find that so hard to accept? It's hard enough to be what I expect of myself for my girls, let alone for my husband, for myself, or for our home. As I write, it occurs to me that little Miss P might have the wisdom to calm this unrest in my heart, it is an expression she says often, and I have asked her many times where she has learned it.... it goes like this; after trying her best and not producing the  result she had hoped for, she says with a hint of disappointment mixed with cheerful resignation, "that's that best that I could do." She always says she hears this from me, although I have never to my knowledge said that to her. Perhaps on a very basic level, that's what my heart is saying to hers. Hopefully I won't always feel this way....hopefully they don't feel this way, hopefully this feeling will just go away.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=watching-my-girls-grow</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 25 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=this-heart</guid>
						<title>This heart</title>
						<description><![CDATA["This heart, is for you, Mommy."...."it's your Valentine...it has chocolate in it and wine, and, olives and ....oh what is that other thing that you like...." Miss P is staring intently at a little red candy heart on her finger, and she is thinking and talking and talking and...."Olives...", I interupt, "did you say olives..." as her train of thought is broken, Miss P looks up, "yes  Mommy, you like olives...this heart is filled with all of the things that you love, so you know that I love you...". 
Very cute. Very sweet. She gets it, I think to myself. She gets that when you love someone, you want to give them all the things they love and that make them happy.
Even things like Olives. Now that is love.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=this-heart</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 19 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=home-tel</guid>
						<title>Home-tel</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Or the Home depot. That's what Miss P referred to the hotel as, when we went to Niagara Falls for the night. Us , the girls, and a change of scenery.Add some swiming and a yummy dinner at the Keg with full view of the Falls.....it was nice. Miss P was so happy. Just a day before we went, she lamented, "I have lost my purr, it's gone". Purring is what she used to do when she was very very happy, ever since she was a baby. It's been so long since she's purrred. "how do I get it back Mommy?" She asked."Well, I responded, you can't just make the sound, you have to feel it deep inside, a happiness in your heart that makes you purr!"....well, a winter escape to a pool was all it took. and she has been purring ever since. She was SUCH A GOOD GIRL! And really has been since we returned. Definately worth it....who knew Home Depot served up purr worthy, winter weekend getaways to stir crazy, sleep deprived families? ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=home-tel</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 18 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=funny-baby</guid>
						<title>Funny Baby</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Lulu has a new trick and it makes me laugh and delights me in that it reveals yet another piece of her blossoming personality. She is extreme (perhaps like her  mother), chill and calm one minute, fiery and crackly with her temper the next, and often, for other peoples enjoyment, a clown. 
She's had the rhythm for a while and won't disappoint if asked to dance or wiggle her bottom. She initiates it on her own if she likes the beat - SO CUTE.
But the latest is filled with drama, intent and anticipation. It starts with a wiggly bottomed crawl around the house until she happens upon a blanket. Carefully with both little hands curled around the top, she sits up and lifts the blanket high above her head and holds it there, longer than you would expect, for added effect. Then, with great gusto and drama, whoosh, she drops her arms and looks around proudly - peek. Did you see that? Says the expression on her face. We saw it Baby Em, we're watching you as you become this funny, fiesty, funky little person.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=funny-baby</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 17 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=naughty-baby</guid>
						<title>NAUGHTY BABY</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Emmy lu keeps Mommy on her toes. Just last week, in literally 30 seconds of my attention being elsewhere, she had jiggled or wiggled the gate at the bottom of the stairs enough to get through...as I walked back from the laundry room to investigate the odd distance of her little voice saying, "BAP BAP", I found that she was no longer downstairs, but upstairs in her sisters room, playing. Disaster averted,not at all funny,  and I have to say that picturing her making a high speed ascent on our very steep stairs not only made me feel a bit sick to my stomache, but it actually made me think that she has guardian angels that can fly very fast....as fast as she can crawl. She is also very good at eating almost anything off of the floor (and I have taken to vacuuming daily, sometimes more). The last two finger sweeps involved a special K vanilla almond flake, a lint ball, and best of all, a foil heart which did not block her airway as it had a whole in the centre. Instead, it required giving her enough water for her to bring that potentially life threatening airway blocker up by her own power.  All this and I consider myself to be a highly attentive maman. Best of all, when baby lu is about to get into mischief and I happen upon her, she drops whatever it is she is into and crawls super fast in the opposite direction!
Naughty baby!

NAUGHTY BABY UPDATE

Am adding this in as it does not warrant its own entry but the same night I wrote about Baby Em's antics, she rocked the house for more than two hours. What did she do? She did not cry or scream, instead, she hollered with glee and with feeling, banging the wall and shaking/biting her crib rails...I think it may have been a combination of the red dye in her antibiotic (ANOTHER EARINFECTION) and in the tempra...but who knows. All I can say is that her crib is now in the middle of her room and .....what a NAUGHTY BABY!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=naughty-baby</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 13 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=everybodys-talking</guid>
						<title>Everybody's talking</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Everybody is talking in our house, all the time. To those who know me, that should come as no suprise. Poor Daddy, good thing he's the quiet type.
Baby Em's recent addition to her baby language is the word, "BAP". She says it like she means it and often. BAP!!! If you respond, with a likewise, "BAP", she'll look at you like, "you think so too?well,  BAP!"
As for Miss P, she has added a new word, which marks  a new stage, to her already chatty little mouth and busy little mind. To just about everything said to her, she replies, "Why?But Why..." only what makes it so extra cute is that it comes out like this, "WOI, But WOI?". It's been over a week and I am proud to report that only yesterday did I respond with "because I said so". It certainly is making me think alot, about answers, but mostly just about how cute WOI sounds. Oh and BAP too. 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=everybodys-talking</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 08 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=shellfish</guid>
						<title>Shellfish</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss p, as noted previously, has some sharing issues with Lu. She really cannot touch anything without Miss p removing it from her hands and literally hiding it. It can be a bit much some days (ok, most). I decided after a recent offense, to explain to Miss P, why this was undesirable behavior.  It seemed like a great idea, especially since Miss P is very inquisitive these days. It went something like this, "Miss P, you should not take toys away from your sister,"....."because it is selfish, and selfish is not...." before I had a chance to go any further or elaborate, Miss P said very seriously, "well, why do we call some fish shellfish, then?". Right, this lesson was lost. With a smile and a mixture of disbelief/totally expected understanding, I said, "oh, well, those fish are called 'shellfish' because they live in shells, Mommy said 'selfish', meaning only thinking of ourselves, in our house we should think of each other too, sharing is a good way to do that", uh yah, ok whatever, nice recovery. What a precocious and clever little monkey she is...that little brain never stops working, never stops trying to figure it all out. For the record, it is only one of the things I love best about her.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=shellfish</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 07 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=we-stand</guid>
						<title>We stand?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's been a busy time. This leaves little time to record all the little things that pass in a day, a week, or more with Miss P. The latest installment takes place a couple of weeks ago, when I was agonizing over sending Miss P to JK at the new public school around the corner from us, or to keep her in her 2:12 ratio Montessori program. To help me (over?) my anxiety, I arranged to meet with Miss P's teachers. What I learned is what I knew already in my heart. Miss P will not participate in circle time, will not stand for Oh Canada, anything regarding conformity, and she is out. I know this about her, I know this about her Dad, but it still makes me marvel at the wonder of this unique and strong personality. All very good things later in life when "everybody is doing it", not so much now. Casually I mentionned Oh Canada, the next day. Proudly, Miss P sang a few lines. "And do you stand up when you sing," I asked? "No". She answered. In the greatest exageration of mock horror and suprise, I said, "but what do you mean you don't stand for Oh Canada....?" Before I could finish, she replied, "Well, I live in Burlington." Oh, I thought, OK. So like, why on earth should you sing, let alone stand for Oh Canada, its not like its Oh Burlington, or anything. "Well," I said, carefully, quietly, "Daddy and Papa would be so cross if they knew you didn't stand for Oh Canada...it is our country's song, and we love and are proud of our country, that is how we show it. Everyone stands for Oh Canada, and that is a good thing." Thoughtfully, she added, "well, I saw a Police man singing Oh Canada on the TV for Hockey, do you remember?", "Yes, " I said, "that's right, just look at the hockey game, how proud everyone is to stand up for it, and you should be too." The next school day, she proudly announced that she stood up for Oh Canada, days later, her teacher whispered the same thing to me. The power of suggestion, of an explaination of an expectation. Its hard in this rush rush world to remember that little minds and little hearts are growing and watching and wondering, why? how come,?what is it that you expect from me?]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=we-stand</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 02 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=with-feeling</guid>
						<title>With feeling</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It takes all kinds to make the world go around. Children undoubtedly go through different ages and stages, so I try not to take it to heart or worry too much when miss p, steps on baby em's hands and instead of retreating when she cries, digs her heels in further for effect. Grown ups, however, don't have that excuse. In this instance, I believe, it simply comes down to different forms of character. There are those who, bumping into you on the street, or in a mall, recoil, shudder, and say things like, "excuse me, sorry, parden me". Others, instead, throw in a little extra hip, a glare,a frown or even add some expletives. I am not sure what to make of this observation, other than it reminds me of two things. For one, I know which kind of person I strive to be, and further, I know which kind of person I hope my daughters will be. Don't get me wrong, I've been known to offer up a few expletives of my own. What I must remind myself, is that, the hip checkers and frowners of the world would love for the "I'm sorry's" of the world to join them. Then they would not have to be accountable. So the best way to fight this kind of negativism, is with a positive disposition. It is not easy, to maintain. It is so hard not to get offended, incensed even, over the entitled, out of my way behaviour that is so common in this memememe world. But tolerance is the best example, of that I am sure. It reminds me of a time when I was 8, when my teacher, knowing I was an 'I'm sorry', tolerant kind of child, sat next to me, a frowning, hip checker, who did her best to get under my skin. She'd poke me with her pencil, pull my hair, try to take my work. Diligently, tolerantly, I'd sit. That is the case most times with me, until my red-headed temper betrays me and my ears blow hot, angry steam like the whistle on a train. I am not suggesting that it is a good idea to be a door mat, but at the end of the day, what is better? Being the person recoiling out of respect and concern for another's space or ideas, or being a bratty entitled hip checker, with no concern for the above, who unapologetically and incorrectly believes that their space, their line of motion or thought is the only way. I know who I want to be. Do you?
 ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=with-feeling</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 25 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=kick-kick-kick</guid>
						<title>Kick, kick, kick</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Baby lu has her own little ways of expressing happiness. Often we see it in her little kicky feet. When she likes something, she starts grinning and kicking away. So cute. Those little legs, thighs like I don't know what. So soft and rolly. Yum. Her legs are like a tail is to a puppy. When she likes something, aside from dancing, she does a kick, kick, kick. Top rated sure fire big kick worthy things include (in no specific order and are not limited to); bunbun, glowy, Dora, Paige & Nanny. Sometimes, baby lu will just topple over, seemingly out of nowhere,  and bonk her head . I have now realized (after witnessing it first hand) that often it is because she has seen something  she likes gets excited, kicks and then ..... TIMBER. I guess that sort of thing happens to everyone at some point in their lives. We see and want something we like. Without thinking it through and checking our balance, if you will, we get wrapped up and swept away by whatever it is we have focused on. Then, seemingly out of no where,  TIMBER . Reality hits and we find ourselves on our bottoms. Sometimes we see it coming but don't make the necessary changes to stop the fall, other times it takes us by suprise and upsets our entire sense of balance, but as long as we remember to keep getting back up again, everything will be alright.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=kick-kick-kick</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 24 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=cherish-meant</guid>
						<title>Cherish meant</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Just like it says, before I was a mother, I didn't know the meaning of "Cherish", or at least not in a daily, tangible, overwhelming, all powerful way. I discovered this one day by myself, rather uneventfully, when Miss P was just a babe in arms. Hmmmm, I thought, what is a word that describes how this feels....Cherish. That is the word that came into my mind. Not the kind of word I would typically use, it always reminded me of that cheeseball Lionel Richie or debarge 80's song (oh, how much am I aging myself right now). But there it was. Cherish. As defined in the dictionary, it means, to hold dear, or to have great affection for. Since I vowed to do this with my marriage,  I should really have had a better sense of how cherishing something with your entire being can knock you over, make you silly and sappy and an entirely more vulnerable, more human, more real individual than you were before (you became a mother). I was reminded of that feeling, the same I had with Miss P those years ago, just yesterday, as I held a sleeping lulu in my arms. I breathed in and wished silently to hold (cherish) this memory for ever, just as I cherish this little baby, the most recent tenant in my joyfully expanding heart.....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=cherish-meant</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 20 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=pride</guid>
						<title>Pride</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Pride is a funny thing. It is a strong emotion. It can be positive; feeling proud of your child or having pride in self. Often it can be misplaced, willful,  and the source of many  poor judgements, regrets, actions/inactions. Sometimes it simply prevents us from doing what we must do. Today, Miss P and I had a little rif. She was desperate for a nap, coming down with a cold and just so obviously exhausted and ready to sleep. Enter the cast of Madagascar. 
Marty, Gloria, Melman and Alex, though seemingly harmless at 2 inches tall a piece, were keeping Miss P awake, fueling her inate reluctance to give into sleep. I, sensed where this was headed (have been there before). I KNEW that she was in dire need of this nap and decided to relegate the Madagascar guys to the hall, with the promise of a post-nap reunion. This did not go over well. There were alot of tears.  Hurt, frustrated, angry, tired, persistent, pride filled tears....as Miss P cried relentlessly, I sensed that the only way she would accept this "defeat" was for me to get up. She knew it too. Just as I stood up to leave her room, she cried, "I don't want you here, I want you to leave here...." and so I did.  Even as I left her room, I knew she'd sleep (I never feel that way, usually I don't even let myself hope that she will). Today, I sensed as I have only one time before, that she needed me to leave her some space. Without this space, her pride would not allow her to back away, accept the circumstances and get on with what needed to be done. In this case, what needed to be done was some serious napping. Who knows what it might be in the future, but I know this lesson can grow with us. As for myself and for my family, I hope I am never so blindsided by my pride, that I fail to see and hear their need for the space, time, and grace to sort out their own.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=pride</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 19 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=stuffing-a-sock-in-it</guid>
						<title>Stuffing a sock in it</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I don't know what it is. It's been going on for sometime now. Baby Lu (still sometimes refered to as Baby Em, but mostly as Lulu), has a penchant for stuffing socks in her mouth. I see it all the time. Because she has these narrow little heels, no socks ever stay on. Add to it, the fact that big sis, Miss P, loves to be barefoot and well, we've got a bit of a sock problem around our house. Being the youngest, Baby Lu has taken advantage of an otherwise potentially stinky situation. There she goes as I type, crawling around the floor with a sock stuffed into her mouth, chewing and chomping and squeeling (muffled squeels)...she did it the other day at my girlfriends....they weren't even any of our socks! I am not sure what this all means, but I do know one thing, when she is up every night at 9:30, 10:30, 11:00, 2:00, 3:30, 4:45, and finally at around 5:30 for the morning (until she crashes out in the car on her way to or from somewhere), I wish I had a few socks handy, cause, love her as I do, at those times, I'd secretly like to shove a sock in it....]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=stuffing-a-sock-in-it</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 18 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=shelter-from-the-rain</guid>
						<title>Shelter from the rain</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P sat, expectantly on the couch upstairs in the church, snack in one hand, drink in the other, as the DVD began to play. Soft music, blackness, then, came rain. Before anyone said anything, Miss P looked at the Pastor and said, "Well, we don't have an umbrella, but we have a Bible..."
And I thought to myself later on, without meaning to, she touched on something we could all be reminded of. Shelter from the storms in our lives is elusive. They are a fact of life, and often, not the worst things that can happen to us. Sometimes, not always, the cliche holds true, after the rain, the sun comes out again.
If this is true, maybe we should worry less about creating false shelters for ourselves during stormy times, accept that our clothes may get wet and instead, focus on sheltering what is inside, in our hearts, from the storms raging around us.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=shelter-from-the-rain</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 17 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=girls-in-cars</guid>
						<title>Girls in cars</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Mommy," said Miss P, on our way to Milton this morning, "When you are happy, I love you as round as a circle..." "ahhhhh", I replied, as she continued, "and when you are grouchy, I love you as crooked as a Christmas tree....", "hmmmm", I thought, what a funny girl, my girl is clever and thoughtful and funny. Where does she get this stuff? "Well," I said, "When you are a good girl, I love you as BLUE AS THE SKY!!!!!....and, when you are naughty, I love you as BLUE AS THE SKY!!!". She thought about this for a moment, then a big giggle, "hahaha, that's funny Mommy, you are silly!". It is a fun little game that we play and I love to hear the creative things she says, as for me, I thought it was the perfect, lighthearted moment to drive home the simple message that nomatter what, Mommy's love for you is constant, as blue as the sky, regardless of the forecast. For you, my sweet little P,  that love is unchanging, unconditional and everlasting. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=girls-in-cars</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 16 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=boys</guid>
						<title>Boys?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's been a fun and busy day. Busy  but balanced. I even caught myself thinking, while bathing both girls, (dinner ready, waiting for Daddy to come home), why aren't I stressed? I'm tired, yes, but stessed, no. This felt good. As for Miss P, I tried to imagine how she might have seen her day. It was a school day and  just for special, she brought lady bug stickers to share with her class. One of the boys, (not thrilled with being stuck with a green lady bug), suggested that next time she consider bringing transformer stickers instead. This same boy, also likes scooby doo, according to Miss P, which she DOES NOT LIKE, for the record. 
Later in the day, we met with a friend. Her two boys kindly offered an unsuspecting and shy Miss P, an oreo. She agonized over their offers until finally she relented. When we left, the younger boy valiently chased after our car, while Miss P, not sure what to make of this display, waved like the Queen from her window. En route to our house, we made a stop at yet another "boyfriend's". Oddly, he offered Miss P an Oreo too. After eating it, she turned to myself and my girlfriend and said, "He shouldn't have offered me an oreo, it made my tummy hurt!" . Then, instead of playing with her beloved friend, Miss P, proceeded to play with his younger sisters dolls (unheard of behaviour if you know Miss P). I suspect she might have been overwhelmed with all these boys......boys, boys, boys, telling her what she should like, offering her oreos, chasing after her car, taking apart dolls and pencil sharpeners and playing video games.....uhhhhhgggg....boys. What's a girl to do but retreat to the comfort of feeding a dolly a bubba and playing in the pretend kitchen?]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=boys</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 15 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=no-cavaties</guid>
						<title>No Cavaties!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[ Miss P recently started using big girl "hello kitty" toothpaste, the kind you have to spit out when you brush, which she does happily each morning (noon) and night! Now that she was so excited about brushing teeth, it seemed like the right time for a first visit to the dentists. She was apprehensive but willing. She had been told stories about a rocky waterfall and fish pond awaiting her inside, and for courage, she was permitted to bring lambie. She was such a good girl. She climbed in the chair, "went for a ride" . She was visibly nervous and at moments, seemingly terrified.  She sat still and did as she was asked, pretending to watch Thomas on the TV, with bright orange, goofy sunglasses on, lambie clutched tightly in her arms and Mommy stroking her hand a little,  for reassurance. Watching her, I felt proud that she was becoming a big girl, capable of overcoming that little bit of fear she felt. I also felt a little sad, watching her, only three years old, frightened and no doubt wondering what this was all about. For a moment, I let my mind wander down that path, wondering, if I was feeling like I did at that moment, how on earth parents with children in life threatening situations or suffering from terminal/serious illnesses cope while standing by helplessly, watching their little ones. It was a brief moment, a quick glance at how strong we can all be when we must be, and at just how blessed we are to have two healthy girls.  ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=no-cavaties</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 13 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=miss-p-is-learning-the-words</guid>
						<title>Miss P is learning the words</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It turns out that Miss P has a tremendous aptitude for learning the words to songs. 
During the Christmas break, it became apparent that she had learned nearly every word to every Christmas carol, without any visible effort or intent.
She sings all the time, more and more each day. I try to make a point of telling her that she has a beautiful voice. I listen very carefully to see what songs she is singing as she also likes to make up her own. 
Tonight, at dinner, she was singing a familiar tune just under her breath. As I listened closely, I said, "Miss P, that is nice to hear you singing Oh Canada, did you learn that at school...?" without responding, she continued....this time, just a little bit louder...
"Oh Canada, out home and naked land..."
Smile. I did. And while the children in her class may be having fun with words (there is a three year age mix), Miss P, a little girl who's three,  is oblivious to this notable change in lyrics. To her it sounds right, two syllables.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=miss-p-is-learning-the-words</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 10 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-break-for-miss-p</guid>
						<title>A break for Miss P</title>
						<description><![CDATA[..."but I don't want to go to school..." she cried as we got ourselves ready to leave the house. "I like staying home with Mommy..." Translation; (according to a conversation Miss P had with Papa this weekend, shared by Papa tonight).. "I don't like going to school because baby sister stays home with Mommy..." (or something to that effect.) The point is, she does not miss a beat nor does she want to.  Not knowing this, I tried to pitch the best reasons I could think of for Miss P to be happy about going back to school. At the top of the list;  she would get to have a break from Mommy and Baby Em. It sounded good and I thought we were on to something. However, this new information from Papa shed some light on what she was really thinking. It was more like, "yeah,  keep talking Mommy, I might be small, but I am a big thinker and I am not buying it"...]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-break-for-miss-p</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 08 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=casual-friday</guid>
						<title>Casual Friday</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We assured Miss P she would not need to wear a coat and tie, after all Friday's are casual. That didn't stop her from self consciously looking at her jeans and shirt when Daddy jokingly asked, "where is your coat and tie?". We were quick to point out that Daddy was not wearing a coat and tie and that he was just making a joke. Excitedly she looked around his office and was suprised when Daddy opened his desk drawer to show her some strategically placed stickers and lollis. After a look out the window, she was ready to settle down at a desk to work (sticker). Daddy rounded up some paper and away she went. Baby Em crawled around ( too excited to feed, which we heard about later in the car...). 
Dinner was yummy and fun, at one of our favorite  restaurants, Mamma Martinos. We don't eat out very often but we are sure to bring the right stuff in our distraction packs....stickers for Miss P and teethers, baby food , cookies and cheerios for baby Em.
Finally, we made a quick stop into pottery barn kids, in search of a beanbag chair. Miss P, played and played in the kids area - she had a ball...in fact, we could not get her away from the toys to make decisions about a chair. When asked if she did, in fact, want a beanbag chair as was planned, she replied, "no, I am happy with the presents Santa brought me". To put this into context, Miss P studies the pottery barn kids catalogue (magazine) every night when she sits on the "throne". (Don't even ask me how this began) But it works and she loves it and has lusted after a beanbag chair for months (perhaps because Mommy told her she had one when she was little?). Anyway, when Mommy announced our plan to go to the pottery barn, she asked, "to get me a beanbag chair?" Mommy reaponded by telling her that Santa had brought her many nice things, and that it might not be right to go buying more, just yet. So, while Miss P played, Baby Em had a power nap in the stroller and Daddy sussed out a shop he had on his mind. On our way out, we visited another person at work (our very good friend who's son is, according to Miss P, her best friend).....and as we got into our car, we ran into yet another good friend. Funny as none of us live anywhere near the mall. It truly felt like a small world, on a really wonderful day. And as Miss P placed her little head on her pillow, she said, "Mommy, I want to go back to Daddy's work again with Daddy, in the car and he will give me stickers and lollis and go to get me some paper...."
Sweet dreams are made of this.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=casual-friday</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 04 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=reaction</guid>
						<title>Reaction</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It is only natural. It is the law of physics, isn't it? So why should it suprise us that this is what is taking place in our household right now?
As baby Em hits different milestone's in the mobility department, Miss P hits milestones on the naughtiness charts. It seems literally that the higher baby Em reaches, the lower Miss P stoops. 
I know this is all a part of accepting or not accepting a new reality. It is about turf and hierarchy, who is the alpha girl and who is not. Miss P seems to be having a difficult time accepting the daily assaults on her position as head mobile, moving little person. Baby Em, oblivious to this, seems determined to defy gravity at every opportunity. As a result, Mommy (head referee) has frayed nerves and has begun to (simultaneously) consult and create the Bain family play book. There have been yellow cards issued, red ones even. And many injuries suffered by the youngest on our team. The most shocking (infuriating) are the ones inflicted intentionally by our former number one angel, now number one naughty girl.  Its the law of nature, I suppose, the law of physics......that the more Baby Em pulls herself up, the more determined Miss P is to push her down. Funny how that works, but, growing up as the youngest, I can safely say, Baby Em will figure it out and Miss P will get hers. In the meantime, I am going to hang on to my whistle and hope for the best.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=reaction</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 02 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-new-year</guid>
						<title>A new year</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I.m not sure what it is that makes the New Year so special. Or what it was....its been a long time since I have stayed up to ring it in, or felt any of the artificial sense of wonder at how I might change, by resolving to do so on this one day. 
What is the New Year to Miss P? Well, for one thing, it symbolizes the end of Christmas. Not a very happy occasion if you are three. It represents a festive hangover, if you will. SHe is not yet old enough to put her finger on it, but she feels it. The other night before bed, she looked up at Daddy and said, "Daddy I am tired of partys." That was before our annual friens Christmas party that took place last night, and dinner at Papa and Grandma's tonight. To think,  we thought we were having a very low key holiday. It just goes to show you, how little our little people need to be or want to be pumped up. They thrive on predictability and routine and the holiday season offers very little of this. So my resolution and one I am making on behalf of our girls, is to be predictable. In our daily activities and interactions, in my moods (I will do my best at this, sleep dependant), and in my reactions to day to day life. It won't be easy, but it will be well worth it for all.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-new-year</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 01 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=when-i-grow-up</guid>
						<title>When I grow up</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Daddy will not be happy that I am writing this. But this is the kind of thing that shows just how much our little ones watch us, learn from us and want to do everything we do, just the way we do it. 
The other night as bathtime was underway, Miss P jumped off the potty and stood on her tippy toes, bouncing and jumping, neck bent back so she could look up at her daddy. "When I grow up,Daddy, I want to stand up to go pee like you..." To that Daddy replied, "oh no sweetie, only Daddy's stand up to go pee"...and before he finished, she continued to dance and prance and wiggle on her tippy toes, her pony tail bobbing up and down,  pleading with him, "oh please Daddy, please, can't I stand up to go pee too,please Daddy, when I'm all grown up, just like you?!"
It brought a big smile to my face and its a vision I will always remember. A perfect moment of wide eyed, bare bottomed  innocence. A little girl, looking up to her Daddy, wanting to be just like him.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=when-i-grow-up</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 30 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-dancing-section</guid>
						<title>The dancing section</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P has serious issues with sharing or not sharing, I should say. It can probably be dismissed as a phase but it is a bit trying at times.
We try at all times to facilitate and encourage sharing. It does not help.
You can imagine how heightened her desire is to establish turf and ownership of belongings, following the Christmas rush and all the new things it brought into our home. 
Of particular interst, is the family band Santa picked up (at Costco no less) for Miss P. In an attempt to work on sharing, Daddy sat down on the play carpet to shake a little tamborine. This did not go over well. Miss P, arms wrapped around the drum, madly tossing intstruments into it, shimmed and scurried away. I joined in the fun, with Baby Em. I introduced myself...."Hi, Miss P, Daddy, its nice to meet you, I'm Mommy, and this is Baby Em, can we play family band with you? What instruments can we play? Miss P, would you like to choose some for us?" 
Still protectively hugging the base of the drum, Miss P pondered this proposition. She smiled and moved in a little closer. Reaching into the drum, she lifted a lady bug xylophone out and began to play. As she did, she slid the drum behind her (just out of everyone's reach) and pleasantly declared, "you guys are the dancing section." Then proceeded to bang on the drum and sing, "Glory to God!".
A diplomatic and creative way of saying, "I am no sucker and you are not touching MY FAMILY BAND".]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-dancing-section</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 28 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=gratitude-not-attitude</guid>
						<title>Gratitude not attitude</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Mommy,  I want to go downstairs and play with my new toys..." Now that is a sweet sound and a relief.  Miss P has not really been one to play with toys....she prefers to climb the walls (get into mischief) and roll on the floors and  things....when she's not doing crafts or the occasional puzzle. Play with her toys??!!! That is so wonderfull....and it was a wonderful day. Miss P played and played (and Baby Em did too!), drawing little or no negative attention to herself!  She poured over her basket of new books, propped up in her bed with her new little reading lamp set up on her new little bedside table. So cute. Today, Grandma asked her, "What was your favorite gift this Christmas...." to which Miss P replied, "I like all of my new things!". Whew. Thank goodness. I am not sure how but it seems already, at the tender age of three, Miss P, in all the excitement and excess, is displaying more gratitude than attitude. I hope that doesn't change. I hope we have many more days like today....and I hope that simple thankfulness for new things, and time spent with family never fades.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=gratitude-not-attitude</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 26 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=observant</guid>
						<title>Observant</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Yesterday, during some downtime, Miss P sat and played with her family band and bristol blocks, newly received from Santa. She paused for a moment, looked at Daddy and I and said, "I think maybe Santa shops at Costco....?"
How is that for observant?]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=observant</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 25 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=give-us-more</guid>
						<title>Give us more.....??</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Exhale. That is what I am doing as I am sitting down to write this out. How do I say it? How do I put it. The above statement is a little joke ongoing in our household for several years....it is our code phrase for excess. It comes from a friend's father who has a knack for saying what everyone is thinking but doesn't dare speak out loud. It is disgusting, the excess of the holidays. We love it (or else we would not do it, or feel that we had to?) or maybe its that we are trapped by expectations, those of ourselves and of our families and friends. Give us more....we keep coming back for it year after year. We think it every year but we don't change anything.....all of the excesses. Christmas, at least the Halmark version of it, is like some kind of conspiracy and like lost sheep we simply follow the flock. We follow into the malls, to the party's and the photostudios, we do it because everyone does, because that is what we think we must do. 
When the evening news is reporting on Santa sightings....something is wrong with this world. I know I sound like a crazy. I am guilty too. So guilty so how can I say and think all of this. How can I reconcile these thoughts with the amount of gifts I bought, wrapped and gave, the number of gifts underneath my tree, and the overwhelming feeling that things are somehow completely out of control and that I am contributing to this madness. How do we find, strike and maintain a balance? There are traditions to be upheld, a large family each with different ideas of what is and is not acceptable. And then there are our girls. So unbelievably loved and blessed. Material things aside, our girls our blessed with health, love and security. A family who adores them, Grandparents who are present in their day to day lives, Great grandparents who offer so much love and the very foundation that our family is built upon. Thanks to God, we are not grieving nor sick, we have our health, we are safe and secure, living in freedom. Add to it that we are so very fortunate in our material lives as well. We want for very little. Perhaps even writing this may seem ungracious, which I have to stress is not at all the case. We are so very thankful and painfully aware of all that we have and how lucky we are to have it. But if I have to choose a holiday catch phrase, and hope that in choosing my girls gain something in the depth of their character, the old adage, "less is more" would have to be it. What is the alternative? It's disgusting, we love it give us more? I don't think so.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=give-us-more</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 25 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=meditationexhaustion</guid>
						<title>Meditation/Exhaustion?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I am writing Christmas in two parts. I planned to write last night, but this is what happenend instead. It had been a stressful couple of days outside of the holiday norm as Miss P had the stomache flu. Thankfully, all was well in time for Church and fondue at Grandma and Papa's. Afterwards, it was home to bed. As I was getting ready for bed at 10:30, baby Em awoke. I went to feed her and then a funny thing happened. Apparently, I dozed off. This happens very rarely. When I woke up, I figured I had dozed off for a few minutes but when I went to stand up, my legs nearly gave out. I just about fell over! It took a few moments, as I stood frozen, waiting for the feeling to come back into my limbs (all except one arm!)  Quietly, I called to Daddy, hoping he'd hear me on the monitor, not a chance! I finally got the feeling back and made my way to our room. I was confused, my side of the bed was made. Had I made it when I got up to get Baby Em? I looked at the clock, it was 12:50 am. Slowly I realized, I had fallen asleep nearly 2 1/2 hours prior. Cross legged, on a love seat with Baby Em in my arms. It sure felt like an out of body experience, perhaps this is where exhaustion meets meditation? Either way, I need to start getting some sleep. Soon.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=meditationexhaustion</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 25 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=skiing</guid>
						<title>Skiing</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Yesterday I got to do something I have quietly wished to do for as long as I can remember.  I got to take my daughter skiing. Just Mommy and Miss P. It was short, fun, and positively uneventful. No real tears to speak of. Just the right amount of time on snow (50 minutes to be exact). No frantic disorganized moments of frustration. It was planned and executed simply. It was all worth it the second I saw your face and heard that great big whoop of joy come out of your mouth, an unguarded moment before you caught yourself....but still you played along and for a time I let myself forget I was Mommy. Instead I tried to remember what it was like to teach something new and fun to someone very small......It was a brief introduction to something that Mommy really really loves to do. Something Mommy hopes to enjoy with you as you grow....and maybe in sharing this one thing, you might come to know a part of me you might not otherwise have known.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=skiing</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 22 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=for-this-moment</guid>
						<title>For this moment</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I felt so humbled at the sight of it. My two girls side by side, in the dark on Miss P's bed, asleep, holding hands. Pure beauty (in my eyes). Pure everything. Breathing in time with one another. This moment, I thought, is perfect.  As I lay there with my body curled around theirs, it occured to me that This Moment, is all I could ask for in this life. I wonder if this is what Daddy thought, when he arrived home to find his three girls together, asleep in bed.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=for-this-moment</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 20 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=so-she-can-see-everything</guid>
						<title>So she can see everything</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I'd like some of those too, please! But I'd also like to know where Miss P gets these ideas?! Such an obscure request.  Fittingly, an obscure search ensued. What else is a mother to do upon receiving her dolly's "one and only Christmas wish". It came at a time of heigtened sleep deprivation, under the blanket of a family sick with colds, at the tail end of a super needy phase of Baby Em's and hence, a super naughty stage of Miss P's. It made me so determined and was actually a welcomed distraction from all the other things in life that were making me feel like I wanted to explode. And then, to my relief, comes an innocent and humble Christmas wish from my own little Christmas angel and with it some perspective. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=so-she-can-see-everything</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 19 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-one-horse-open-sleigh</guid>
						<title>A one horse open sleigh</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today I got to do something I don't do enough of. Play with P. Literally, Play. Not supervise a craft or story time or stickering but actually play. We went sledding at the creek by my Mom and Dad's house. The place where I grew up, doing the exact thing we did. On the same sled, no less. It was fun. We only went three times (three for a little girl who is three) - the first went over well, no drama. The second, awesome, so much fun, I was so busy saying, "Wheeeeeee" that I was suprised to hear over my own voice, a trill little voice saying, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh", It was great, until we went off the tracks and into the powder and had a face full of cold fluffy, powdery snow. That DID NOT GO OVER WELL. Miss P does not react well to unexpected face washings....(same reaction when she first got knocked over by a wave in the ocean and got a face full of salt water) Anyway, I insisted we do one last ride (a third) and she could ride backwards facing me to ensure no more suprises....That seemed to save things and Miss P has agreed that we should come again another day. She's so funny, even though she said she likes it, apparently her favorite part was walking up the hill and back to Nanny and Grandads, with the "reigns" to the sled under her arms, pretending to be a horse, pulling a sleigh,  a one horse open sleigh, I suppose.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-one-horse-open-sleigh</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 17 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=all-is-calm</guid>
						<title>All is calm</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It is quiet in our home. Baby Lu is taking a rare nap. Miss P has gone to famous people players with Grandma and Papa. Daddy is fighting the Christmas shopping crowds. Mommy should be....sleeping, folding and putting laundry away, wrapping presents, finishing Christmas cards, stamping and addressing them, baking....not necessarily in that order but pretty close. Instead, I started reading a book I ordered for Miss P, called The Three Questions. I had decided to put it away for another time but sat down to have a look......what a powerful story. The three questions are as follows; When is the best time to do things? Who is the most important one? What is the right thing to do? Very heavy stuff. Questions that will no doubt come up over and over in a lifetime. The answers to these questions in this book are as follows;
..... "there is only one important time, and that time is now....the most important one is always the one you are with. And the most important thing is to do good for the one who is standing at your side...for these...are the answers to what is most important in this world. This is why we are here". 
I think this is a beautiful lesson. It serves to remind me that life is short, tomorrow is not promised and all I have is today. That as hard as it is,every day, I should be in the moment with my children, friends and family, instead taking for granted that a calmer, quieter time will come in which to appreciate these relationships. That instead of worrying about a million things I want to do , there is truly only one thing I have to do. It is to love and protect what is in my heart.  In doing this, I can alway be sure that I will hear the answers to these questions above the roar of everyday life.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=all-is-calm</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 15 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=in-her-eyes</guid>
						<title>In her eyes</title>
						<description><![CDATA[By the title, you might think this is going to be quite profound. It's not. 
Tonight, before bed Miss P and I were chattering, well she was struggling as I wrestled some pj's onto her. Somehow a discussion about hair began and this is what she said;
"your hair is broken Mommy."
"Broken?" I repeated. "Yes", she continued, "your hair is broken in half". Her little hands stroked my hair and face. Her eyes studied my own. 
Love those hands, that face... at times, she still looks like a baby to me, other times, like tonight, her words and thoughts come together, reflecting her age and understanding of the world. It's times like these that give me just a glimpse of the world from her eyes. Even the small things, like the part in my hair.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=in-her-eyes</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 14 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=crawling</guid>
						<title>Crawling</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I can't believe it. In just one week, my babe in arms, who still timbers over when you sit her up, has learned to lift her body, rock it back and forth, lunge and shim and finally CRAWL! She's got it and she's determined. One track mind, eye on the prize, She is going to keep me hopping. I love it but I am not ready....I have to baby proof and how do I do that with all the "stuff" Miss P leaves around? Very scary....scarier is that Miss P only crawled for about six weeks before she was up and cruising. Hopefully baby Em will explore the floor for a little bit longer than her sister did. Time flies and babies grow. It's wonderful and exciting and a little bit sad too. She's growing and learning my baby lu.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=crawling</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 13 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=this-light</guid>
						<title>This Light</title>
						<description><![CDATA[As a final touch to our Christmas decor, I bought small battery operated candles to put in each window of our house. It reminds me of our time in the maritimes - every home had these, it seemed. Miss P thought these were great and loved helping me set up. She danced around in her room with the lights out, "candle" in her hand, singing and chattering....suddenly she looked at me, held up the candle and said, "this light is truth that baby Jesus was born on the Christmas day". Well then. Could I have been more suprised? Where on earth did she get that phrase from? I have never spoken to her in that way, regarding Christmas or anything else for that matter. Only stated in a couple of brief conversations that Christmas is Baby Jesus' birthday, that this is the reason we celebrate. I bought a couple of stories too, about the true meaning of Christmas, but they are in circulation with all other stories. With the commercial side of Christmas coming at us from all sides; music, stores, school, television, baking...everywhere, it is such a pleasant suprise to know that the message, the real message has made its way through. She's just three but you cannot imagine how relieved I felt to hear those words come out of her mouth. It is not to say that we cannot indulge her little heart and mind with the halmark version of Christmas its just that it is so overdone. Adults are the worst offenders, we pump them up so much up in the weeks leading up to the holidays and then wonder why we all feel a little cagey. That's why talk of santa and presents and naughty vs. nice is being kept to a minimum. Our decorations went up today and our music, stories and dvd's came out. Beyond that, we have no plans to fill Miss P's head beyond what she is being exposed to already. Hopefully our "moderation",  will keep and teach the balance. As they say, all things in moderation and that includes santa, reindeer, elves, and all that other stuff.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=this-light</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 09 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=we-have-that-too</guid>
						<title>We have that too...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Yesterday, on our way to Clembrook Farm's in search of the "perfect Christmas tree" with Miss P's school, the following conversation took place. As always, while driving....
"Who are you calling Mommy?"
"Mommy's just calling to see if she can get directions to the tree farm, because she's not sure if its the one she's thinking of...oh, I hope I do know where I am going, my phone is dead, the battery needs to be charged."
"We have that too, Mommy..." 
"What's that sweetie, what do we have?" 
"Our good friend, he's dead too.....David is dead too."
"Oh!Right, you're right!"
It's astonishing to me, how everyday in every way, the things I say or don't say, explain or leave unexplained, out loud, under my breath or in my body language, manifest somehow in Miss P's concept and understanding of the world. The things she sees and hears from her Daddy, myself and the other important people in her life, affect every part of her, the way she interacts, behaves, speaks, thinks and understands. Directly and indirectly, we are her picture of right or wrong, truth or untruth, acceptable or unacceptable, whether or not our own manifestation of this is correct. That is huge and daunting ...it shapes a little life. In all the moments (not just the good ones), she's soaking it in, processing it and becoming the person she will be.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=we-have-that-too</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 08 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=trying</guid>
						<title>Trying</title>
						<description><![CDATA[My goal, when starting this, was to make more moments, or savour more moments with my girls. To take myself and my world a little more lightly. To stress less and open my eyes more. Some days I do this very well and others not so much. It gives the day to day a sort of bipolar quality. The ups are up and the downs are such a bummer. I know that the down days generally correlate to the amount of (or lack of) sleep I get. It doesn't make me feel any less disappointed in myself or shitty because I am not projecting the happy self I usually am. Its been weeks since I've had any sleep, ok months. Seven to be exact. But what is crazy is that the older Baby Em gets, the less sleep I am getting and it does start to take its toll (to be fair, she has been sick on and off for the last six weeks, poor her!). Short term memory, for example, is a little sketchy....don't worry, when I can't remember if I gave the girls their Medicine or not, I just don't give it to them for another 4 - 6 hours to be safe. When I pour myself two drinks, make two cups of tea, put the milk in the cupboard or the sugar in the fridge, I laugh and shake my head. When I drop things and they shatter on the floor, I clean it up, cursing myself but laughing just the same. What can I expect, being so sleep deprived. Wishing, if only, Daddy could really understand how worn down I am (that my seemingly endless reserve of energy is SO FAR IN DEBT!). Feeling guilty that I am so worn down. Wanting to show the true joy, love and grattitude that I feel in my heart for my girls, for my marriage, for my family and my life, instead of being a little less patient, a little more grumpy, a little more spacey and a lot less carefree than I normally am. For the record, today was a great day. Challenging and non-stop. Lots of tears from the girls (they are both sick with colds). Lots of joy too. Playing outside, trying on ski boots and skiis, sleigh rides, crafts, and my favorite...making baby food for Baby Em. She sat in her high chair watching so closely as Miss P and I peeled, cut, chopped, pureed and strained, avocados, mangos, and bananas. Then opened her mouth like a baby bird as we used our fingers to spoon in the different tastes.  A baby food buffet. So cute, so much fun. 
Altogether a good day. Here is where I need to let go of my constant expectation of myself to be perfect, as I know my girls love me just as I am, the same as I do them. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=trying</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 06 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=rhymes-with-sucker</guid>
						<title>Rhymes with sucker...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[In the last few days, Miss P has been playing with words. Rhyming words to be specific. She is starting to figure it out and have fun with it. Just the other night at bathtime, I joined in, going through all the letters that sounded like a certain word. I did this without actually saying the right word. Miss P thought this was hilarious. Today, after having a sucker (a reward for leaving Gymboree without a struggle), the game began. Sucker, lucker, *ucker, mucker.... uhhuh. OK, Mommy, what to do now? I just observed for a minute. The game continued. The word in question stayed sandwiched in between some other, less offensive words. "Uh, Miss P," I say, how about we say, "sucky, lucky, mucky, ducky, instead." She laughed and happily joined, "sucky, ducky, lucky, #ucky..." then quickly she switched back to, "sucker %ucker, mucker...".  Then I knew, I HAD to say something. As she said it, AGAIN, (whew, I'm blushing now, but I am also sure that she knows this word is different from the others... though she isn't using it too intentionally, simply trying it out) I casually mentionned that THAT word, was not a good word. A BAD word in fact. A word that good girls do not say and grown ups DEFINATELY do not like to hear little girls saying. I have this feeling that my reaction was oh so lame..but I did my best, said what I said and moved on. Like a lot of things lately, I did not want to draw unnecessary attention to it, inadvertantly causing her to do the exact opposite of what I'd hoped she would. In the meantime, I will do my best to avoid the rhyming game.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=rhymes-with-sucker</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 04 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=look-im-smoking</guid>
						<title>Look! I'm smoking!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Yesterday afternoon, Miss P sat down at her desk to have her snack. Pretzel sticks & raisins....suddenly, she called to us, "look, I'm smoking.....". Daddy calmy looked over his shoulder, but me, the hair stood up on my neck. I stood up straight like a board, to see her holding a pretzel stick....like a cigarette. I went to her, to ask,  where did she learn about/see someone smoking? "At the parade," she told me, "our neighbours were smoking..." I begin..."Do you know that smoking is bad for our health and especially not for little girls?Some people smoke, but it is not good". That seemed to end that. Enough of a reaction to address it, not too much so as to overreact ( I hope). Why is this important to write about? Seeing Miss P pretend to smoke was not cute...it was shocking. To put this into context, my mother smokes, she will kill me for including that fact....but she is a closet smoker. Miss P will never see her smoke.  Just as she never saw Mommy smoke, (I have smoked more on than off for the last 14 years). Having quit for more than a year, (at least half a dozen times), I still consider myself to be a smoker. Once a smoker,  always a smoker, even if only in your mind....cravings, an in explicable melancholy for a most unhealthy habit. To be truthful, smoking is more than a habit, it is an addiction. It becomes part of who you are and the more it does, the harder it is to break free. It creates a void in your life which you are constanty seeking to fill. The junkie, looking for her next fix. I say all of this honestly because I know. I say it without judgement. I am not trying tap into feelings of fear or disgust, I have compassion for the smoker. Being a smoker doesn't make you bad or unlovable, being a smoker makes you someone who has made a poor life choice. It is unhealthy, it is stinky and expensive and invites a struggle into your life that most could literally live without. I am saying this, regardless of how my own struggle with cigarettes plays out. I want my girls to know that the only guarenteed way to quit smoking is to never have started in the first place. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=look-im-smoking</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 03 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=rocking-and-rolling</guid>
						<title>Rocking and Rolling</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Baby Em is trying so hard! Given the choice, she'd prefer to be on her tum any day, to sitting all propped up with pillows. She's cute and smart. Being as unsteady as she is literally makes her, well, a sitting duck (when Miss P is around). On her tummy, however, she's got it all figured out. She can move and shim and swivel. She looks like she should be in yoga class and when that doesn't get things done, she uses her head for balance  and momentum...literally. 
Yesterday was a big step for her, as she finally moved herself up off of her elbows and onto all fours. She's started to rock back and forth and gets so mad and frustrated. I remember this stage with Miss P. She was a lot more patient, but had a lot safer and calmer a space in which to practice. I have a video of Miss P at about the same age as Baby Em is now, wearing the same sleeper Baby Em is sleeping in as I write...and little Miss P is trying so hard, just like Baby Em. Oh how I love to watch them grow. 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=rocking-and-rolling</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 01 Dec 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=i-miss-my-family</guid>
						<title>I miss my family....</title>
						<description><![CDATA[That's what Miss P told her teachers at school yesterday. She talked non-stop about her family and how much she loves them. She made crafts (for her family) - I know this because I received a briefing when I picked her up. At drop off, Miss P wept. Apparently she did fine, (if pining all morning for her family is fine). The relief on her face when I pick her up tells me she suffers a great deal of anxiety while we are apart. She attends two mornings a week and I am confident I could not have found a more loving environment (outside of our home or the homes of her grandparents). She is in a small class of 12 with 2 teachers. They pick her up, cuddle her, hug her, and encourage the other children to be equally as loving. Still, it is not home. Her teachers spoke to her about the differences between home and school. According to Miss P, they explained to her that school is a place where you cannot talk, without first raising your hand. Also, at school, we must not stick our hands in our mouths or eat our clothing (Miss P says she does this because she feels like having her suss...fair to assume this is due to the anxiety she feels).
In discussing this with Daddy, he felt we should explain to Miss P that school is where we send her to learn. I on the otherhand, felt that we should  "sell" school as one of the places we send her to learn. I think Daddy may have dismissed this slight difference in phrasing. Though subtle, the difference makes all the difference in the world! Viewing school as "the place where you go to learn", suggests that school is "THE" place to learn. The use of the singular, implies it is the only (better?)place to learn. The latter, viewing school as "one of the places you go to learn", suggests that it is a part of the whole. There is a whole other world out there for her to be exposed to, through family and travel and extra curricular activities. School is important, but it is not the most impotant thing. I hope this doesn't come back to haunt me someday, when Miss P and baby Em are grown and trying to skip classes. To be clear, my girls, Mommy believes in education and hopes to inspire in you, a lifelong love of learning.  I studied with great passion and believe in the pursuit of education. But do I believe that school is "THE" place where we send you to learn. Uh, no. Not by far. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=i-miss-my-family</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 30 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=an-elephant-never-forgets</guid>
						<title>An elephant never forgets</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P is like an elephant. She never forgets. I should remind myself of this when I tell her something. When she asks a question and I answer in some lame, uncomfortable, unnatural way, not knowing what else to say, what I want to say, what I should say or how to say it. Case in point, as we are driving yesterday, Miss P looks up at an airplane in the sky, wondering about Daddy's recent trip to Halifax....to see David (attend his funeral). The following conversation unfolds. "And how is David Mommy, is he feeling all better?" asks Miss P. So grown up and compassionate, and wait a minute, she doesn't miss a beat. What am I going to say to that? I didn't tell her that he died. At least not in a way that she could understand. I don't even know if there is a way that she could understand. Maybe because I don't know if I understand... entirely.... "uhhhh no he's not feeling better, he's..." wait stop. "well, actually..." I am thinking,  Yes he is feeling better. He's free from his physical illness and at peace. I know I believe that. How do I tell her that? How do I explain that? She's three, we're driving. Something just took her attention away, thankfully as I had nothing prepared or right to say. She'll ask again. Make no mistake. Note to self; (next time), answer from the heart. . ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=an-elephant-never-forgets</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 28 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=an-olive-branch</guid>
						<title>An olive branch</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today I am waiting in the hallway with all the other parents at pick up time. Doors open, kids flow through and reunite with Moms and Dads, Grandmas, and caregivers. I see Miss P with her cutie snowman hat making her way towards me and at the same time, I hear, "Can I speak to you for a moment please?". It's Miss P's teacher. She is smiling, so it can't be bad, can it? They never do this. "Have a seat right here and wait for Mommy," I say to Miss P. Then I move in closer for the talk. "Miss P is cross at you." says the teacher, sort of smiling,  "for bringing her to school". Apparently she overheard Miss P saying this to the other teacher and thought she might warn me. Hmmmm. Funny, in all the reading I have been doing lately, it occured to me, just last night,that Miss P might actually be very cross with me. I did after all, go and have another baby. A baby who, at six months, is suddenly demanding more time and attention. This confirms it. Whew, I think to myself. Good thing I planned on lunch and a play hour at Gymboree on the way home! The initial purpose was to blow off steam and to reintroduce a contained safe place for climbing, jumping and bouncing. (Something had to be done to avoid the certain injuries awaiting if things continued as they were in our family room.) More importantly, however, this would serve to mend a row, between me and a cross little P. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=an-olive-branch</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 27 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=energy-got-some</guid>
						<title>Energy. Got Some?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P is a bundle of energy. I know, you are thinking, like most her age, ....but I know and you know (if you know Miss P) that she's not your average, active three year old. I have known this for a long time. Maybe our first clue came when she started walking at 
9 1/2 months. It could have been sooner, because as soon as she learned to role over and you put her down, she moved from one end of a room to the other, rolling back and forth. Constant motion. I saw it again, at her second birthday. While all the other children sat down to take a break from the cold, fresh air, Miss P began looking for escape routes. This can be good. Momentum is good in life, when directed and focused. There are a few things that really do this for her. Crafts, stickers, art. She will sit forever doing these things. Other things, not so much. We tried our hand at various organized and structured activities but she never seemed to be doing what everyone else was doing, while they were doing it. This will be fine with me when she is a teenager...in this respect, I hope it will follow her as she grows. When everyone else is telling their parents half truths or worse, maybe she'll be telling us the whole story, or maybe when everyone else is doing something they probably shouldn't, she'll be hanging back, thinking, this isn't for me. Right now, however, it makes for long and busy days. She literally climbs the walls and is spilling over with energy at the end of the night. She moves and wiggles and kicks, dances, runs, bounces, jumps, twists, turns, spins and then, at the end of the day, falls over. She stays that way until morning (75% of the time) and then anxiously barges into our room, running to my window, peeking her head under the blinds to see if Mr. Sun has come up. She cannot wait to start a new day. Now that is energy, if only I could have what's left at the end of the day, before she gives in to sleep, I could better see the world through her eyes. Wouldn't that be something?   ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=energy-got-some</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 26 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-yes-list</guid>
						<title>The "Yes List"</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We've had some discussion lately about "yes" and "no" behaviours. Whenever Miss P commits a "No" behaviour, like not sharing, or not using manners, for example, Mommy has taken to pointing out that those things are not nice and they are things that we don't do in our family. I am trying to establish some "house rules". There was also a little talk one morning after a series of "No" days, about the idea (by Dr.Sears himself) of having a "yes day". I loved this idea, I said it just how I read it, "what do you like better, a grouchy Mommy or a happy Mommy? Mommy likes to be happy too - lets have a yes day!". I didn't follow the plan or anything, but the suggestion that we could have a day without struggle, seemed to catch on. Somehow these two approaches became one and Miss P started to request that we sit down and make a "Yes" list. Daddy was absent for this meeting but we sent him the minutes. Here they are;
1. Please, Thank yous, May I's...we use our manners

2. Ears - we use them to listen to eachother (we turn them on!)

3. No hitting, spanking or tapping...it makes us feel bad

4. No shouting or yelling when we're angry (loud voices outside, angry voices are hard to understand and make us feel bad too)

5. We share with eachother

6. We don't throw things [at eachother] throwing is for playing outside

7.  We are loving to eachother - hugs & kisses and encouraging words

8. No put-downs (not nice words)

9. We take quiet time for ourselves

10. We are helpful to eachother and happy to help (cleaning up, chores, etc.)

Today I wanted to add, no stepping on baby Em, or picking her up and dropping her on pillows but we hope these types no behaviours, at some point, will pass. With the list above, we're aiming for longevity.I truly hope we all help one another to do our best to stick to the house rules, always.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=the-yes-list</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 25 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=you-should-try-it-eh</guid>
						<title>You should try it, eh.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Fifteen minutes into Miss P's "quiet time"...I open her door to find her in her underwear, ballet shoes on, hairband around her neck (according to her, she was wearing a tie so she could go to work with Daddy). 
"Mommy!" she exclaimed. "I am wearing a tie(explained as above), I want to do ballet again, do you think my ballet teachers would like to see my bottom wiggle?" she says this as she does her bottom wiggle dance, which I love. The funniest part about this is that she was a ballet drop out. Hated it. Then on to the next thought, "Mommy, come here!", she says,  as she lifts her little pink and white gingham chair and moves it closer to me. "Sit your big bottom in my little chair and take a rest....its too big for my little bottom but just right for your big bottom.... come on Mommy, take a rest...you should try it, eh?!".
Well, I laughed, ok. Hmm. Big bottom, compared to hers, she's got a point. As far as sitting down and taking a rest, she makes another valid point. I never do that. "Uh, ok Miss P," I manage through my laughter...the problem is, I think to myself,  if I sit down, I might not ever get up. Now that is a sign (more than being told that I have a big bottom) that I need to lighten up! ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=you-should-try-it-eh</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 24 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=goodbye-to-a-friend</guid>
						<title>Goodbye to a friend</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today has been a great day with the girls. While this is the kind of day I treasure, I must confess that there is a place my heart would like to be too. I wish with my whole heart that I could be in Halifax, with Daddy, paying my respects to a dear friend and to his family. What does this have to do with our family and our girls? Well, it has to do with the things a Mommy  will not do. I will not leave Baby Em and I will not take her on a plane, after she is finally shaking her ear infection and fever. I would not dream of setting her back. Even if it means that I miss something I would never have dreamt of missing. So to honour someone I loved very much, I am including his obituary and an article from the Halifax Chronicle Herald, in this entry. After reading this, I can honestly say that I doubt either of our girls will ever have the opportunity to meet and become friends with such an extraordinary individual. They don't make them like this anymore....
MacKEEN, H. David
MacKEEN, H. David - 74, died November 20, 2007, in the Halifax Infirmary, QEII, after a lengthy illness. Born in Halifax, he was the only son of the late Hon. Henry P. MacKeen and the late Alice (Tilley) MacKeen. He was educated at Tower Road School in Halifax and Rothesay Collegiate School in New Brunswick, and received his Bachelor of Art degree from Dalhousie University in 1954. After more than a decade in the insurance business, first at Northern Life Insurance and then at Westmount Life, he was Executive Director of the Canadian Council of Christians and Jews from 1975 to 1980, and Executive Assistant to the late Hon. Edmund Morris, Minister of Fisheries and Social Services from 1980 to 1986. He was appointed to the National Parole Board in 1986, where he worked until his retirement in 1996. Mr. MacKeen was actively involved in political and community affairs throughout his life. He served as an alderman for the City of Halifax, representing Ward 3, from 1969 to 1974, and was deputy mayor for the City of Halifax from 1972 to 1973. Mr. MacKeen served on a number of boards and committees while on city council, including the Halifax School Board, the Downtown Planning Commission, and the Halifax Forum Commission. Over the years, he also served on the boards of many volunteer community organizations, including the Nova Scotia Civil Liberties Union; the Nova Scotia Association for Advancement of Coloured People; the John Howard Society; the Halifax Youth Foundation; Nova Scotia Committee on Family Violence; the North End Work Activity Project; Ogilvie Tower Day Care Centre; Halifax Youth Clinic; the Devonshire Centre; the North End Criminal Justice and Diversion Project; the Micmac Friendship Society, and the Nova Scotia Festival of the Arts. He was a member of the Nova Scotia Delegation of Ministers' Conferences on Aboriginal Rights; the Young Offenders' Act, and president of the Halifax Police Boys and Girls Club. An active Tory party member all his life, he served in nearly every possible party role. After his retirement, he served as a palliative care volunteer for the Northwood Hospice. David's wit, compassion, political savvy and free spirit will be sorely missed by his family and his wide circle of loyal friends. He is survived by his son, Henry David Cameron (Shona Kinley) and their children Ewan David and Kirsten Shona; his daughter, Judith Alison (Scott Shapiro), Ann Arbor, Mich., and their children Liza Alice and Henry David, and his sister, Judith Tilley Moreira. He will also be missed by beloved dog, Duffy.  

David MacKeen would have been 75 on Dec. 4.
The lifelong Tory came from a long line of politicians: his father, H.P. MacKeen, became lieutenant-governor of Nova Scotia, and his grandfather held the same post, dying in office.

Mr. MacKeen’s mother, Alice Tilley MacKeen, was the granddaughter of Sir Samuel Leonard Tilley, a Father of Confederation who served two terms as cabinet minister to Sir John A. Macdonald and also served as lieutenant-governor of New Brunswick.

Mr. MacKeen "grew up in the south end, in a privileged upbringing and out of that, for some reason or another, he became very socially conscious, an activist," longtime friend Robert Stapells said.

Mr. MacKeen was one of the founding members of the Halifax Welfare Rights organization and worked with the John Howard Society, the Nova Scotia Civil Liberties Union, the Nova Scotia Association for the Advancement of Coloured People and a host of community groups.

In 1950, he enrolled at Dalhousie University and later studied at the University of New Brunswick. 

He became president of the Nova Scotia Young Progressive Conservative Association in 1961 and entered the insurance business two years later. 

It wasn’t until 1969, after he had made the city’s north end his home, that Mr. MacKeen entered public life.

Mr. Stapells, who ran Mr. MacKeen’s first municipal campaign, recalled doing a blitz with his friend at one apartment building.

"He gave away 15 dozen roses, each with a personal card to every female in the building," Mr. Stapells said. 

The cards "contained a personal request for their votes."

Mr. MacKeen won the Ward 3 seat that year and held it until 1974. He also served as deputy mayor from 1972-73.

"He was one of the most accessible politicians that I knew then or have known since," said Mr. Stapells, who served on council with Mr. MacKeen.

He often helped out poorer constituents, Mr. Stapells said. 

And "when he befriended you, (there was) nothing that could change that, nothing."

Former federal Tory cabinet minister Stewart McInnes remembers swimming at the MacKeen family estate when he and Mr. Mac-Keen were just boys.

"David was a very warm, genuine person. He had a wonderful sense of humour," Mr. McInnes said of his lifelong friend.

But he was also "a political animal, and a great Conservative like his father was before him."

Mr. MacKeen ran unsuccessfully for mayor and in 1970, challenged then-leader of the provincial Liberals Gerald Regan for his seat in the legislature.

"He never left the political arena," said Mr. Stapells, who was the Ward 8 alderman during Mr. MacKeen’s second term.

From 1980 to 1986, Mr. MacKeen served as assistant to provincial Tory cabinet minister Edmund Morris. 

And in 1986, then-prime minister Brian Mulroney appointed Mr. MacKeen to a post with the National Parole Board, a job he held until 1996.

Mr. Stapells last saw Mr. MacKeen last week walking his beloved dog, Duffy, and was surprised to hear of his death.

"I will miss him and his great political bantering," Mr. Stapells said.


]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=goodbye-to-a-friend</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 23 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=empathy</guid>
						<title>Empathy</title>
						<description><![CDATA[This morning, while Miss P, baby Em and I were driving to a class bowling trip, my cel phone rang. Funny that it rang, funny that I answered it, funny that I happened to be holding it when it rang. It was Daddy and he called to tell Mommy that her dear friend, David, died yesterday. It wasn't at all what I expected to hear, it wasn't the name I thought he'd say, I was caught off guard, then just so sad to hear the news. He was dying but we had just spoken less than two weeks ago. He cried when we said goodbye, I told him that we loved him. 
Miss P laughed when she heard my funny, muffled, unconvincing, "I'm okay" to Daddy as we said goodbye. I said it twice and the second time, she didn't laugh. "Mommy, what IS wrong?" she asked. Again, unconvincingly, "Mommy feels sad because she just found out her good friend is sick..." hmm. Not sure about that response but we'll tune it up later if we need to, if she wants more info or if I can't, for some reason, pull it together. Instantly, the response, like a little mother hen, "Mommy, I want to hug you, that will make you feel better...." It did already. This outpouring of empathy did not stop there. In the five minutes or so that remained in our drive, Miss P told me, bravely, matter of factly that she, "knew just what to do to make things better...." a hug would help me and in turn help my friend. Such empathy for such a little thing and her hugs, just the suggestion of them, were of comfor to me.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=empathy</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 22 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=priorities</guid>
						<title>Priorities</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Yesterdays, today. Sick babe, hence the delay.

Last night was Miss P's parent teacher night. Daddy, who had not yet seen Miss P's school, spent the better part of a week, pumping her up for the occasion. Her chance to tour him around and show us what she does there. Yesterday morning, Daddy's former boss and friend rang up with the opportunity to watch Toronto play Boston. Now this is only one of the reasons that Daddy is a very good Daddy to Miss P, a little girl who's three. This came staight from that blackberry of his to me....

"Had to decline Leaf tickets...8 rows up for tonight[behind the bench]!!!...There was no way I would think of missing it [parent teacher night]"

It is also one of the reasons I love him so.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=priorities</link>
						<category></category>
						<pubDate>Wed, 21 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mondays</guid>
						<title>Mondays</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I am not sure why but Mondays are fundays. They are the best day of the week, as far as "The girls" are concerned. We all get along nicely, we go downstairs in our pj's (a real treat). We play and dance and sing. Today we made "shakers" out of rice and pasta, finger painted, played "hokie pokie", freeze & go/ red light green light, and on a rare Monday outing, we went to the library without incident. Usually, we don't even leave the house on Mondays! This form of "house arrest" is so fulfilling.  Thank goodness for  Mondays. I wish there were more days like these. My goal for the week...simple - to somehow keep a bit of "Monday" in everyday.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mondays</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 19 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=beauty-happiness-children</guid>
						<title>Beauty + Happiness = Children</title>
						<description><![CDATA["What's that Mommy?" asked Miss P, as a paper tag fell out of the box and onto the floor. "That, is quote on a piece of paper, would you like me to read it to you?" I asked.
 (I had made it for a baby shower. At the time,  I thought it conveyed what being a parent felt like for someone who was not yet a parent.)
I saved it because everytime I have read it, since the first time, it has made my heart swell inside my chest. Because it is simple and true and often overlooked (by me). Fitting at this time, when I feel like a helpless bystander to Miss P's ups downs and to my own.
As I begin to read, my voice shakes and big tears fill my eyes...."we find a delight in the beauty and happiness of children that makes the heart too big for the body" - Ralph Waldo Emerson.
That is just so very true and how beautifully those words capture that feeling. I love it. And I love feeling that way. Its worth all the other feelings that fall under this "job description" to feel the purity of the joy in my heart when watching the beauty and happiness of my own children, and all children.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=beauty-happiness-children</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 18 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=learning-a-new-language</guid>
						<title>Learning a new language.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[With a little lost sleep and a lot of hours in front of the computer..I am taking it upon myself to learn a new language. I am talking about talking so miss p hears me, really hears me and then, listens. It is not easy, I have to accept and examine misguided choices or courses of action/non-action I have taken as a parent. Thankfully, however, I have found a line of thought, an approach which I think suits my parenting style. I am hoping that Daddy, when he receives his brief, agrees. So far, in my exchanges with Miss P today, it seemed to work. Little phrases and expressions which seem so basic but are nowhere to be found in the parenting tool box when you are tired and your toddler is pushing all of your buttons at once. 
I am not sure if it is the actual meat of the information that delivers, or if it is my willingness to buy into the philosophy of the diet. In other words, whatever I am saying may or may not be the difference, but it has given me a new perspective and the feeling that I can regain my composure. I am so happy to be resuming the parental role of laying the foundation of a loving respectful relationship (even when things are off the rails) rather than fighting daily stuggles with no eye on the horizon. This is not going to be easy, Miss P is clever and determined and very capable of testing me. That, essentially, is her job. For my part,  I will continue reading...on line and in print.  A friend of many years, with an amazing family, told me once, "you have to have a plan". This is so true. After nearly three years of flying by the seat of our pants, I finally concede or realize with eyes fully open, that a plan, is the only option, the only answer to raising our girls, consistently, respectfully and lovingly.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=learning-a-new-language</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 17 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=collecting-p</guid>
						<title>Collecting P</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I could not overlook the double meaning behind this statement. Today, Miss P is at Grandma's house so Baby Em and I spent most of the morning trying to "collect pee"...her pee to be specific...it was more like waiting for her to go. What a silly and absurd thing, a sticky little collection bag, attached to baby Em's bottom. Alot of play with Mommy, sans pants, diaper or anything. While I am sure that she enjoyed the extra attention, her little frowns and raised eyebrows, indicated that she clearly wondered what was going on!
Ironically, collecting "P" (Miss P) is something I have spent the better part of two years doing. She is a mover, a runner, or in her words, an "escape artist". She will proudly tell that to anyone who happens to be in the right place at the right time,  as she makes a dash for the door. Anyplace, anytime, anywhere. No fear. 
I can think of no better example then last night at the mall, while baby Em (in the sling) and I zipped in to a couple of shops,  Daddy and Miss P hung out. Figure 1;  the two of them sitting, nicely at a table in the food court, sharing a blizzard. I am sure its the stuff Daddy dreamt of when he imagined spending quality time with his little angel. Fast forward ten minutes to "figure 2". I am in line at the GAP, I see them stroll in to the store and suddenly I hear shrieks of glee (Paige), a soft shout of protest (Daddy), and a blur of pink fleece move through the store, arms out, at breakneck speed. I am not sure I have ever seen Daddy move that fast. Miss P was soldier carried out of the store, in full protest. Ahhhh. Yes, she's mine, is the vibe I give off to the horrified, questionning stares I get from other customers and staff. Collecting P, its all in a days work.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=collecting-p</link>
						<category></category>
						<pubDate>Fri, 16 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=abstract-art</guid>
						<title>Abstract art</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today, on the way home from school, I reached into Miss P's backpack to find a little square of  paper. On it, a few red scribbles. I said to Miss P, "wow look at your art, you like using pencil crayons..." to that she responded, "its a ladybug." "I can see that," I replied, "because it is red. It is a red ladybug." "with a black polka dot..."corrected Miss P. At a second glance, there it was, a small black scribbled circle. Look at that, I thought. It is a ladybug!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=abstract-art</link>
						<category></category>
						<pubDate>Thu, 15 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-good-girl-who-is-sometimes-naughty</guid>
						<title>A good girl who is sometimes naughty?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Every week I attend a mom and tots group where child care is provided. Miss P usually goes to my Mom and Dad's and baby Em hangs with me. Today, both girls attended. They played and stayed busy with the other kids and the new and interesting toys. Every so often I could hear Miss P's high pitched trill of a voice, followed by Baby Em's deep growly laugh. After a while, I heard the care giver ask if everyone could listen like good boys and girls.....To that, Miss P replied, "Em is a good girl..."...the response, "what about you dear, are you a good girl too..."
Without missing a beat, Miss P responded, "No, I'm naughty."

Later today I made the point to inform her that although she could behave naughty sometimes, she was infact, a good girl. A good girl who, sometimes has a little case of the naughties....
"No Mommy," she said with a mischevious grin and a big proud smile, " I am naughty"...
Oh, ok then. I thought it was just me.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-good-girl-who-is-sometimes-naughty</link>
						<category></category>
						<pubDate>Wed, 14 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=non-verbal-communication</guid>
						<title>Non-verbal communication</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Baby Em, while easygoing and take anywhere, has always been able to get her point across with a pout, a whimper or a fuss, whenever Mommy has pushed her a little too far (too long in her seat, exersaucer, on the floor, not being given adequate attention). More recently, this subtle way of getting attention has lead to a full out cry (growl?) of anger, distaste and impatience. I have heard that by six months of age, babies have got their mommies number. If this is the case, baby Em is right on track. So now, my calm and peaceful baby is showing her assertive side. Given this recent change, I am thinking that maybe she is not as much like me as I thought she might be, but then I realised that this makes her more like me than ever. Perhaps its the red hair, my willingness to allow myself to be pushed and pushed and pushed until....(picture steam coming out of ears...quiet, raging, firecrackery, messy, anger, in all its scary-ness....)that is me, when I am mad.  I have actually been told (when working as an instructor to new hires) that while funny, and fun and nice,  I could be down right scary when mad. I am sure that is not a good thing. There are worse qualities, I suppose, but it sort of makes you think about it, when you come home after an hour of grocery shopping, to find your six month old, sitting in the middle of the floor, in a bumbo seat, arms and legs rigid, growling (no tears, pure anger) and frantically making the sign for milk (we do baby sign language). It brings to mind a rhyme my Mom and Dad recited to me as a child; 
"There once was a girl (with a curl, right in the middle of her forehead). When she was good, she was very very good and when she was bad, she was horrid."
hmmm. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=non-verbal-communication</link>
						<category></category>
						<pubDate>Tue, 13 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-brave-new-world</guid>
						<title>A brave new world?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Who are you and what have you done with miss p? I am living with an alien. I have no idea how to talk to her, how to appeal to her, how to deal with her. She has always been strong willed but this is disagreement for disagreement's sake. I feel completely unequiped to parent in a way that I hoped would establish boundaries, maintain respect and attain compliance. I didn't expect to feel this way until she was 15. I feel bruised and abused, every single interaction is a showdown of wills. To compound this feeling of shell shock, I am getting less and less sleep each night. Baby Em is teething and rejecting solids in favour of more and more milk. This morning on our way out of the house, I realized, that while we were all fed, clothed and presumably clean, I could not remember the last time I had washed my hair. I shower morning and night - its a habit equivalent to a coffee at waking and a nightcap before sleeping. Still, I could not remember when I washed my hair last.  By the looks it had been more than a couple of days. A stark contrast to my crisp dress pants, sweater and boots. Worse still, (and this is the main reason that I am not sleeping yet) I have lost Miss P's red suss. I did not take it in anger. I simply removed it as sleep was not happening. Put it somewhere that she would not climb (and hurt herself) trying to reach. Tonight before bed, disaster, where's red sussie? Fortunately I was able to locate a back up, but still Miss P went to sleep crying for her red suss. I honestly cannot find it and am dreading her waking up through the night crying out for it. I actually had to call our neighbours and leave a message, asking if perhaps the red suss might be inside the birthday present we took to their daughter's party this afternoon. That sounds funny, until you consider the fact that it isn't because a little toddler stashed it away, but that a sleep deprived and frazzled mom is suffering the very real affects of sleep deprivation on the short term memory. 
As a footnote, that was yesterday and today was a better day. Daddy had the day off and we all just hung out and kept it low key. The loss of red suss did not inflict as much horror as anticipated.  Under constant supervision, Miss P was a little easier to deal with, but not  much. I put her to work (a swiffer can easily be sized down to a pint sized mop), she did dishes, unloaded the dishwasher, dusted...
these acts of helpfulness were rewarded (crafts, stickers). Defiance resulted in lost chances at favorite activities. A better day but we are planning on doing some reading. In the meantime, we are all just working at being nice and getting along...]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-brave-new-world</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 12 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=lest-we-forget</guid>
						<title>Lest we forget</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Though not exactly a "Military family", our exposure is greater than most. Both of Daddy's grandfathers served in World War Two. Papa was in the RCMP. Uncle C serves in the army reserves and is a police officer. Grand Dad served in the Air Force.  Daddy served in the Navy. Fortunately, for Daddy and Gran Dad, they served during peaceful times. Daddy served his time in the decade following the Gulf War and before September 11th. 
Classmates and friends of Daddy's have and are presently serving in Afghanistan. Others have been to Iraq. This is a great distance from the safe walls of the Royal Military College, where they met and forged lifelong friendships. 
Their families are just like our families, except that when their time comes to serve, they must leave the comforts of home, the arms of their loved ones and the safety of our country, to fight and protect the values that enable us to live as we do. These values are basic; the right to education, freedom to learn and to participate in a democratic society, to live without fear, the fear of tyranny and persecution.  
On remembrance days past and as recently as the late nineties, I wondered, how future generations would "remember" when there were no veterans left. Sadly, there is a new generation of veterans. Today and always, we should remember them, give thanks for them, and hope in earnest that there will be future generations with no veterans and only history books to remind us of their sacrifice.
On July 4, 2007, six Canadian soldiers were killed by a roadside bomb in Afghanistan. Of the six, one was a brother Daddy's classmate, another, the husband of Mommy's friend from work. Their sacrifice is real and we should remember them.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/liveslived
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=lest-we-forget</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 11 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=three</guid>
						<title>Three</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Three is not at all like two. That is what Miss P has taught me this week. Three is more stubborn, more saucy, more willing to push buttons, and rules. Three is very "Mommy Mommy". It helps to off set the uncertainties that go with being bigger than a toddler but not quite as big as a big girl. Three is deciding when to take a bath, when to go to sleep, when to "go commando" (don't ask). Three is going to be tricky.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=three</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 10 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=how-do-i-love-you</guid>
						<title>How do I love you?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[There are some days when Mommy just feels like crying. It occurs to me when Miss P is at pre-school and baby Em is asleep and Mommy becomes fully aware of how tired, drained, stretched and overwhelmed she is. She wants to do it all. She knows she can't. She wishes she could (be more patient, organized, present). Its hard when no sleep happens. She wishes she could let herself stop and watch and savour everything (more often), but dinner and dishes and laundry and clutter don' take care of themselves.
Feeling like this has to do with Mommy's ability or inability to strike a balance. It has nothing to do with naughty or nice behaviour from a certain little girl who's three. I write this if only to point out that life is not perfect, that Mommies are not perfect but they try and they strive and they wish they could be, for their girls.
Speaking of perfection, there are days that are perfect...Miss P senses them too. These are the days when she calmly informs me out of nowhere, that her "naughty's are all gone". Other days, not so much. Regardless of the good and bad days, its important for little girls to know, they are perfect just as they are, in all their clever, chatty, creative, and naughty ways. Miss P, you are lovable just for you. Mommy (and Daddy) simply love you and always will. I hope you won't have to read this to know that. I hope we will love you well enough that you will feel it in your heart and just in case you ever doubt it, here it is in black and white. 
One of our favorite stories says it best;
"How do I love you, let me count the ways, I love you on your very best and very worst of days. I'm happy when you're happy and I'm sorry when you're sad and even though it might not show, I love you when you're bad.....how do I love you? its impossible to say, for if I had a million ways and time enough for all the praise, I couldn't tell you all the ways, I love you."
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=how-do-i-love-you</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 09 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=just-like-daddy</guid>
						<title>...just like Daddy!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Yesterday Miss P helped Daddy choose his tie for the day. She chose a conservative stripe with funky grey and purple tones, with some black and white. Then, daddy proceeded to put the tie on (for her benefit). He stood in front of the mirror, she watched from the bed. (Bouncing), She said, "I want a little girl tie like that!...I want to wear a coat and tie like Daddy, so I can go to work too!".
I have a sneaking suspicion that the recent fascination with Daddy's work clothes (the night before she tugged on his dress shirt and declared that she wanted Santa to bring her a shirt like Daddy's), has a little bit to do with how Daddy gets to and from work. The Go train. This week we visited the station twice, as one of our cars was in the shop. It is always a very exciting event for Miss p, she remembers in detail the last time went.....well over a year ago, possibly longer. We don't even get out of the car, but somthing about that Go train and the mystery of Daddy taking it, way far away to the city where the "big finger" points into the sky....well that is something a little girl has to be dressed for. At least that must be what she thinks....
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=just-like-daddy</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 08 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=fish-tales</guid>
						<title>Fish Tales</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P is starting weave some tall tales for my benefit. This was today's edition (I have a feeling there will be more where that came from!)
"These are my flowers, someone gave them to me. I got married. At the church. Daddy met me there at the church. We held hands and danced. Then we stood on our heads. All the children stood on their heads.I married my baby Em, I had to wake her up to go in the car." ....She barely took a breath and I had to write it down.  Where DOES she get this stuff?
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=fish-tales</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 07 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=warm-laundry-and-cookie-cutters</guid>
						<title>Warm laundry and cookie cutters</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Who would have thought that a one hour time change could wreak such havoc on a household? I am a flight attendant and whenever anyone tried to tell me that the one hour time change was causing problems, I balked at the idea. How silly I thought, one hour! That was before I had kids. 
Now, I can honestly say that I am wondering if 5 am is going to be our new wake up call forever (as if six wasn't bad enough before we had to turn the clocks back!). 
needless to say, everyone was a little grumpy yesterday, including me.
We were tired, inexplicably restless, without our car and it was cold and rainy...then I remembered something fun for Miss P that can easily pass an hour while I get to play, interact and do a dreaded chore (fold laundry). Warm laundry. A big pile of it. Dumped out on the floor for Miss P to jump and roll and play in. She loves it. It feels warm and soft and smells good too. She even took her pants and shirt off for the full effect!
Once that was done, there was a crucial time frame to fill,  where naughtiness tends to happen, especially on days when we are cooped up. This is almost always when I am preparing dinner. What to do? 
Cookie cutters. A whole bag full. All shapes and sizes. Two stainless steel bowls and a Styrofoam tray.  Lots of fun. Pressing and feeling the textures. Looking at the shapes and sizes. When that novelty ended (a good 30 minutes), out came the rolling pin, mixing cups, measuring spoons, spatulas and scoops. As I was preparing dinner, I looked over my shoulder to see Miss P in her underwear, sitting on the floor. Rolling, and mixing, cutting cookies, putting them on imaginary baking sheet and into an imaginary oven. It was something to see. I loved it and so did Miss P. On days like this, so much hangs in the balance and things can really go off the rails. These are the days the T.V. goes off, the music goes on, and dancing, puzzles and imaginary, engaging play are the only things that can maintain the harmony.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=warm-laundry-and-cookie-cutters</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 06 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=reaching</guid>
						<title>Reaching</title>
						<description><![CDATA[To reach is to become higher or greater so as to equal (a particular level), to arrive (somewhere) or to understand and communicate...
Baby Em spends a lot of time reaching for things. She is getting better everyday. It still amazes me that she is able to stop, focus, and reach for something specific. 
She is persistent, determined and fairly accurate. If she has her eye on something, she doesn't stop at whatever she reaches first. She persists until she gets that one thing. She keeps trying, stretching, reaching, until she gets what she wants. In the short term, this could make for some interesting toddler years, in the long term, I hope that never changes.
 ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=reaching</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 05 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=selective-hearing</guid>
						<title>Selective Hearing</title>
						<description><![CDATA[A  certain little girl who is finally three, does not listen so well. It often feels like I am helpless, without recourse because Miss P simply will not do anything that she has not thought of in her time,  in her own way. An excellent quality for later in life, but not so much now.
To say that she does not listen, does not give her the credit she deserves. Miss P hears everything, she just does not act on everything she hears. Some of it she files in her box of useless information. Most of it she throws at me from seemingly out of nowhere.  She did this twice today and both times it caught me off guard. 
The first time, we were baking. She was watching intently as I greased and floured the loaf pan. "Mommy, what ARE you doing?" she asked. I explained to her that I was getting the pan ready so we could bake our bread. "They do that in my ival stories, Mommy, what you are doing, they do in my ival stories...", wow, I thought. I don't get this one, so, I asked, "what do they do in your Bible stories?", "they break bread, Mommy, Jesus, breaks bread in the ival stories....", Wow. That sounds so amazing coming from her little mouth...
The second time, almost twelve hours later, we were playing on our bed, Miss P, Baby Em and I. Baby Em was really enjoying her big sister  when Miss P exclaimed,  "Mommy! Baby Em is overjoyed....look Mommy, she is overjoyed!"...."Overjoyed," I repeated, "Yes!" Exclaimed Miss P. "You are right, she is overjoyed... where did you learn a word like that?"
"In my ival stories", she responded. 
Make no mistake, she IS listening.  Those little ears  hear it all but understand only in part. She looks to us (Daddy and Mommy), our every word, expression and reaction to the world, to make sense of things for her. I want to be mindful of this all the time.  I want to do better at this, for her.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=selective-hearing</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 04 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=all-figured-out</guid>
						<title>All figured out</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Giggle giggle from the back seat. "The sun is smiling at me..." said Miss P,  as the rays of beautiful afternoon sun sparkled through the window and onto her angelic face. 
"Mr. Sun is a boy, I know because I call him Mr...I call him Mr. Sun because he is a boy."
She's got it all figured out. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=all-figured-out</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 03 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=kit-for-kids</guid>
						<title>Kit for kids</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Its amazing the stuff we accumulate once children come into our lives. there is so much "kit" we need to get by. Car seats and strollers, bubbas, sussies and sleepers. Blocks and bibs and baby Bjorn's. DVD's, cd's, sleepers and slings. I could go on .  What is amazing, is how much we do not need. It's a great idea to buy a roll of baby powder scented disposable diaper bags, but what's wrong with a shopping bag?A neat little rack for my dishwasher, to put all the little valves and things that go with sippies and such, a good idea too, except I can get by without it. A babyfood mill is convenient but a spatula and a wire mesh strainer turn out some pretty yummy baby food too. 
I am reminded of this fine line between needs, wants, and indulgences that truly make our lives easier vs. hype, after a trip to one of my favorite baby supply stores, 'the safety superstore'.
First let me say, I am NOT COMPLAINING. We are so blessed to have what we have and really, to keep having whatever we want. It's just that it can get a little out of control sometimes. Now,  I am as guilty as the next Nanny, or Grandma, or Great Nanny for wanting to buy cutie things for my girls all the time. Even more guilty because as a Mom, I am sold on some of the hype. Cloth diapers (at 25$ a pop), seventh generation diapers (1.50$ per), vibrating teethers, crocs, jibbitz (or whatever they're called), gymboree....earth's best organic baby food, organic avocados....sometimes it seems like any excuse to spend more....Is it a sickness? Or am I just brainwashed into believing (like so many parents out there) that when and where and how I direct my dollar, I am somehow impacting my child's wellbeing, safety, smarts, or socialization. Don't get me wrong, I believe that for many things you get what you pay for....BUT it seems that in every market, from strollers, to baby food to diapers,  you are met with a choice. It is a choice like going to the gas pump,  regular, premium and super plus. More and more I find myself making the premium choice....I have not quite adopted the super plus attitude yet. I hope I don't. I don't want my girls to think that the best is the most expensive, most current, trendiest, next best thing. Didn't they prove that there is no real difference in these fuels unless you are driving a high performance vehicle? Does that mean we are becoming a high performance family? What does that mean even? I don't think I want to find out.  ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=kit-for-kids</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 02 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-love-that-multiplies</guid>
						<title>A love that multiplies</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's funny how the love you have for your children multiplies and doesn't divide. I could never have imagined that before baby Em arrived. Now my heart understands and knows that truth. But what is also amazing is the difference in how you love each one of them. My love for P is fierce and fiery. We butt heads. She's pushes me in all directions. Fills me up with joy that spills over and makes a mess. I want to wrap her under my wings and keep her in my nest. She is bursting to fly to the next tree, higher, farther, faster.  Baby Em on the other hand is soft and mellow and gentle like a breeze. She moves through me. I know the words to her song. These girls, such a gift, and on a day like today,following the anniversary of the day my first was born, I remember more than ever how I dreamt to have them in my life. Now that they're here, I want to celebrate them and give thanks for them. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-love-that-multiplies</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 01 Nov 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=miss-p-is-three</guid>
						<title>Miss P is Three!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It's official. She's three today. Miss P, baby zebra,  monkey do, goosey....all big and three. Big and three. Still my baby. I won't lie, I spent some time remembering her birthdays today..especially this time last year. We went for a walk, she sat in her stroller and snuggled into a blanket a dear friend made. She played at the park. I pushed her in the swing. It's a memory I cherish. Just me and P.
So, Miss P, on the day you turn three, Mommy and Daddy and baby E, all turn their eyes to your sparkly light, and thank the stars that shine each night, for you and all the smiles you bring, your chatty voice, the songs you sing, for blue lamb and suss and all that is you, we're so proud to be your family and we love you!]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=miss-p-is-three</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 31 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=quiet-walks-on-sunny-days</guid>
						<title>Quiet walks on Sunny Days</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Sounds scandalous, I know. Its not like THAT. Baby Em is nearly 6 months old and it has taken all of this time for me to slow down and seize the kind of moments I so hoped we'd have together. The peaceful kind of moments, ones like I had with my first babe. Simple things, like quiet walks on sunny days. We have had two in the last week! One by the Lake, with the sun shining and waves crashing, it was lovely. Today, by the italian market, browsing in a little shop and taking a stroll in an unfamiliar neighbourhood. Much thanks goes to the beautiful weather for these moments, but some of it goes simply to breathing and pausing and realizing that everyday holds these opportunities. I am convinced that they are calling me all the time, hearing them is as simple as turning down the volume of the world outside. Tuning in to the frequency of my heart, home and family is not always easy but it is necessary. It restores me, and helps to give me that little bit of extra patience I need when things don't go exactly how I'd like them to. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=quiet-walks-on-sunny-days</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 30 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=do-princesses-wear-hiking-boots</guid>
						<title>Do Princesses wear hiking boots?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[That is the name of a story given to us by a special friend. At the end of the story, there is a mirror. Ever since she was very small, we've looked in that mirror together. Beside it, it reads, "a princess is a special place in your heart". A sweet message for a sweet girl, who, like most her age,  believes in that message, believes in princesses and in stories and in magic. 
"Mommy, can I see your face in there too" said Miss P. She wanted to see my reflection in the mirror along with Blue Lamb's. 
"Look" she whispered, "we're all in there." 
"What do you like about this story?", I asked.
"The mirror", she replied.
"Why?" I asked
"Because, it puts you in there".....
"In where?" I asked
"Inside the story..."she answered.
"How do we get out?" I asked
"We could just stay in here forever...." she answered.
Some day, I'll truly wish we had. For now, Little Princesses must go to sleep and Mommies must do their chores.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=do-princesses-wear-hiking-boots</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 29 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=them-called-wheels-mommy</guid>
						<title>Them called wheels, Mommy</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Last night we had a family pizza party, to celebrate Miss P's upcoming third birthday,  I kept looking at her little face, and all I could see was her face last year. Rounder, more plump, more babyish. She looks like a little girl and she is growing up before my very eyes. I know that three is still a babe, but so much growing and changing takes place in three short years. My heart has stretched in ways I didn't know it could. 
As for Miss P, the changes are innumerable. In the last year alone, she has been a fire truck equipped with a ladder, hose and two wheels (feet). Like all changes, It took me a while to get used to the firetruck thing but she patiently corrected me for months when I'd accidentally refer to her wheels as feet. "Them called wheels, Mommy", she'd say. Then, all of a sudden, without any warning, she wasn't a fire truck anymore. It happened sometime after baby Em arrived, and she matter of factly announced it to our Doctor one day during a visit. 
This coincided with the arrival of Mack, her imaginary friend (a truck literally plucked from the pages of her book called "Night Cars", a name borrowed from the movie Cars). She'd point out all the Mack's on the highway and place Mack carefully next to her in bed, or on the swing beside her. Often she'd ask me to push Mack too, and sometimes, she'd choose to play with Mack over other children in the playground. Since our family outing to African Lion Safari in August, we've been in full Madagascar mode. So right now, Miss P is busy being a zebra. Marty actually. (She flirted with the idea of being Melman the giraffe, but the deal was sealed when we bought a zebra costume for Halloween).
Wow, life is so full of possibilities for a little girl soon to be three. What a beautiful little spirit and imagination she has, I am in awe of it and I hope she never stops dreaming, never.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=them-called-wheels-mommy</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 28 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=love-knows-no-colour</guid>
						<title>Love knows no colour</title>
						<description><![CDATA[It is a mystery to Mommies and Daddies, how their little ones choose one thing over all others to become their "best favorite". This is not so much the case with Blue Lamb.
Did you know that he wasn't always blue?
It is a little known fact that blue lamb was once white lamb or just lamb. He was the first gift received when we found out we were expecting and somehow in that first year, he became our go to guy. When Miss P turned one, something changed.  Suddenly she found herself in daycare and experiencing separation anxiety. Lambie really helped with this, except that it became clear, (after a couple of evenings on our babysitters doorstep) that we were going to need backup. So, Mommy and Miss P made a trip to a favorite local shop "A Country Mile", to find another lamb. There we encountered a slight problem. There was a white lamb, but he wasn't quite the same. His tail was shorter and thicker. His satin was different. Then there was another lamb, the same,  except for one thing... this guy was blue. 
With the help of the store clerk, we used a quick process of elimination, and right there, Miss P taught us a lesson about love and loyalty. It is something I  had always known, I just had not seen it in such "vivid colour", unfolding before my eyes. In front of a fussy, barely one year old, Miss P, went both lambs. The choice was clear. The lesson so simple: Love knows no colour. Blue lamb is worn and wonky. He's had a new heart and two new paws and is desperately in need of a new tail. His paws rub noses and owies and tummies and toes. He's been all over, on planes and fairies, in cars and in wedding parties he's been blessed on Sundays and he's even been to Disney World. His power is magical. Miss P says it best, each night before she sleeps,  "God Bless Blue Lamb".]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=love-knows-no-colour</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 27 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=beautiful-noise</guid>
						<title>Beautiful Noise</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Babies love to experiment with their voices. 
As a baby and toddler, Miss P made a beautiful purring noise, like the trill of a flute or a bird's song, or the sound a Disney kitten might make!?. Every once in a while, when she is happy, the purr comes back. It is not a noise she consciously makes. It comes from a place deep inside where true joy and delight dwell.
 For baby Em, this song is like an eagle has landed in our bed at 5:45 each morning. It is loud and shrill and full of excitement. She squeals like she means it, and most times, we wish she wouldn't (mean it so much), or at least not so early in the day.  We get busy shhhhing and peeking to see if Miss P is on her way to join the party in the "eagle's nest". So, while we agree that it's cute, we usually don't stop to really listen and to enjoy this stage in Baby Em's life. This morning was different. Miss P slept at Grandma & Papa's house last night, so for once, instead of worrying about waking up sleeping monkey's, I lay in bed with baby Em and listened and laughed to the sounds of her beautiful noise.  
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=beautiful-noise</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 26 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=monkey-see-monkey-do-monkey-monkey-i-love-you</guid>
						<title>Monkey see & monkey do, monkey monkey I love you</title>
						<description><![CDATA[

Mommy, do you know that I love you so? Look at your hair, its lovely, your curls are coming back. You're just beautiful Mommy. (Naptime cuddles)
And how are your boobies today, Mommy? Are they feeling better or are they still owie. (Morning greetings after Baby Em was born)
Lets play a game. Lets match noses, eyes, mouths, teeth? uh no, not teeth.(Improvisation)
NO! - don't you do that.....don't you ever never never.....oh are you crying, don't cry, its ok. Here let me give you a hug. That will make you feel better. (a conversation with giraffe)
That's right Mommy, that's right, that's right. (when Mommy is having grown up conversation that she is not a part of)
HEY what are you guys talking about!?(When Daddy and Mommy are having grown up conversation in the car) 
I can't know that yet.(A disclaimer when she doesn't want to answer)
Daddy, you have bad breath.(Honesty - in Daddy's defense, a one off)
Well, I have an idea, lambie could make you feel better.(Empathy) 
Boo hiss, we don't like hockey/soccer.(ok, that one took a bit of coaching....)]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=monkey-see-monkey-do-monkey-monkey-i-love-you</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 25 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-detour-to-sportmart</guid>
						<title>A detour to Sportmart</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Last Saturday morning, on our way to a friends birthday party, Miss P and I asked Daddy to detour and stop by Sportmart. We were going to buy skis. Mommy had made a call the night before (after store close) to put aside a little girls ski package. We made our way to the back of the store and out came the cutest littlest pair of skis. I knew they were cute because the punky twentysomething guy on staff kept coming to look at those skis, claiming he'd never seen anything so cute. We fitted her boots, then chose a helmet (pink). Miss P truly seemed excited about this. She can put her boots on by herself. She reminds me of Bambi on ice as she tries to walk in them on our wood floors. The other day she excitedly slid her feet back and forth on her skis (bindings not yet mounted) and later on she picked up sticks in the deep dark forest and pretended to "ski" through the leaves. I understand, from experience, that when the snow comes all bets are off. 
For that reason, it might seem excessive to outfit a little girl who's soon to be three, in ski gear. What about second hand? rental? Well, I did some research and a couple of things brought me to the decision that buying was better. 1) if we have the gear and own it, we will go  2) who has time to hunt down and view used equipment? 3) two girls = double the mileage 4) a good friend (ski friend too) encouraged me by suggesting that this was a great deal to be had.
Now,  usually I would agonize over a purchase as whimsical as this. I would think about it 20 times and consult the same number of people for their opinions. 
But something occurred to me, in an email I wrote to a friend (another friend I happened to make through skiing). When it comes to skiing, for me, there has never been a think twice...well, for me that would be impossible, lets say there has never been a great deal of agonizing. Skiing, for me, is quite simple. I love it. Now I don't expect Miss P to love it. I hope she likes it. And she doesn't have to be the best at it either. She just has to understand that we will be spending tine together, playing and enjoying the outdoors on winter days. 
When I look at what the love of skiing has brought to me, it is a lifelong passion that I can enjoy with friends and family. It has taken me on many adventures, to many beautiful and interesting places. It has brought me great friendships that have grown with me over time. It has tested my comfort zone on more than one occasion. In earlier days, it challenged me to learn and grow and aspire to self improvement. It gave me goals and discipline as a teenager and helped me as an adult when I desperately needed to focus my attention elsewhere in my life. It makes me happy. So happy that the thought of the perfect ski day, blue sky, crisp air, sun shining, truly makes my spirit soar. I don't want to be the kind of parent that pushes things on my girls. But do want to be the kind of parent who can let down her guard and share with my family, the one thing that will forever tap into my youthful spirit? Absolutely.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-detour-to-sportmart</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 24 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=parent-teacher-interview</guid>
						<title>Parent teacher interview</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Today I got to sit down with Miss P's teachers. really I just wanted to know, is she listening and using her manners and treating people properly? I had to ask myself, is that a weird thing to want to know? She's not yet three. I don't have any expectations, other than those. I am not concerned with how she is learning or what she is learning, or producing as far as activities and crafts, or how she measures up or doesn't. I simply want to know, is she doing her best, being her best, on her best? That's all. If we can get that one thing down pat, the rest should naturally follow. Shouldn't it? Learning is lifelong and she has just begun. 
 I am proud of her for just being her. Even when her is being a naughty little thing. She has a mind of her own. One of her teachers said that given her age, she stands up for what she thinks is correct, if she is sure, and is not easily swayed into thinking otherwise. I guess I knew that already. The other teacher told me that during Thanksgiving talks, Miss P contributed the following, "Mommy is thankful for me.". It made me smile because it is sweet and precious but it also made me smile because the night before, we had a bedtime talk about Thanksgiving. About how it feels to be thankful, to love something and to be glad for it. About something that brings us happiness, about Mommy, being thankful for Miss P. She listened and heard and understood that conversation. How amazing is that? What does that say about the power we have to talk to our children, to speak to their hearts and to help them to understand the world around them and their value in it, even little girls, soon to be three. I suppose I should not get too deep, as apparently she tells the teachers everyday that Mommy says, "you have to brush your teeth or they will fall out!" For the record, I have said no such thing.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=parent-teacher-interview</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 23 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=that-kind-of-a-day</guid>
						<title>That kind of a day.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I am trying to figure out at what point I knew it was going to be THAT kind of  a day. 
 
It may have been at 12:30 this morning when I woke up with Baby Em beside me and no recollection of bringing her into our bed, feeding her and falling asleep.  Maybe it was at 2:30, when she rolled over and woke me up for more milk. Or at three when I decided to put her in her crib. Actually, maybe it was at 5 when I decided to stay vertical in her room to feed her. Or at 5:45 when Paige gave us our "wake up call". No, that was a pretty average night.
So it must have been around 7:00 when I went to pick Baby Em up out of our bed (after the four of us had been enjoying some wake up procrastination). She had apparently, left me some unforseen laundry, her sleeper, our sheets and upon further investigation, our matress cover (at least it was on)! This continued, when following clean up detail, I carried a bare bottomed baby Em with me to find some diaper cream. Instead, I was treated to a little shower. Soaked. Now Pj's and a bath mat are added to the growing pile of laundry. I think really, the fate of the day was sealed at 7:45, when  I finally found the t-shirt I had been searching for, only to be at the receiving end of a huge spit up from baby Em. She needed a change, the carpet needed cleaning, but amazingly, the t-shirt was in tact. Hmm. baby shirt and pants added to the list, but so far so good. Whew. Finally we made it downstairs.
Lets see, to give a detailed list of the minor altercations between myself and Miss P from the time I got downstairs until the time we made it out the door would be a bit of overkill. Lets say, she didn't make it easy and my patience was wearing thin. A cracked gate (used mistakenly as a monkey bar),  a toppled toy basket, refusal to clean up, tears, threats, compliance. A request that lambie accompany us to the park in the place of Baby Em, because, little star, lulu and monkey dude could watch her just fine. Insistance that going to the park or to the candy store was a terrible idea, a suggestion from me that she may infact be right on that point, more tears, drama  & struggle. Finally at 10:45 we made it out the door.
This wasn't all bad. I know, it doesn't sound exactly easy. But it was going to be a beautiful day. And we were GOING TO ENJOY IT BY THE LAKE & AT THE PARK, GOT THAT?  I may have been tested, I may have been on the verge of losing my temper on more than one occasion (forgot to mention a mini - rant on the phone to my husband only to find out I was ON SPEAKER PHONE, an out of character expletive in response from me,ok, not that out of character, and a few remorseful, if not indignant texts back and forth to smooth it over).
Ok, now it just sounds like I am complaining, and maybe I am, but I think its mostly because I can't believe that I have not COMPLETELY LOST MY MIND YET, more than it is to wallow in a woe is me mantality. I am actually proud of myself today. 
On the way to the park, we stopped at a discount store to pick up diapers on sale (they were sold out), Miss P, observant little one, noticed this was not a place we'd usually shop, on seeing the stores appearance and picked over shelves, she asked, "Mommy, where are we? Are they still building this store?"
We carried on. After unpacking ourselves, strollers, changed into t-shirts, hats,  we discovered our meter was not working. No big sign to warn, just a little flashing message. I decided that a parking ticket was not the worst thing I'd deal with in my day. On we went. And it went well. Miss P chose a lollipop (a snow white one), we walked by the Lake to get to the park. She swung and climbed and played, chased seagulls, played in the rocks, went to the potty with a minimal struggle. Baby em was baby Em, she slept, looked around, ate, slept some more. She only tried to run away on me three times, after I decided it was time to head back to the car (that's Miss P, not Baby Em, but I suspect that day will come too). We enjoyed a leisurely lunch at the second cup. Miss P drank a milk out of a coffee cup, and ate a cookie as big as her face. I watched with a smile as she lounged over the beautiful leather chairs like she owned the place. NOW THIS IS WHAT I HAD IN MIND! When we got back to the car, we didn't have a parking ticket. Things were looking up (if you ignore the the half a cup of milk spilled on the floor of the car as we were loading up).  I reminded myself while using nearly a half a pack of wipes to clean up, that at least it wasn't on our clothes for a change (haha?) and well, we don't cry over spilled milk, do we?
We got home without a hitch (ok, one more arguement as I insisted that Miss P did not need another pez), we read a story, and Miss P hit the pillow like a tonne of bricks. (thank goodness!) 
Now, where would I start? Baby Em had to eat. She started bananas yesterday. Like a good Mom I sprung into action and mashed up some organic bananas. Baby Em was ready, hungry, happy, full of laughs. Ahhhhh. this was my reward for patience (well, the pursuit of patience). My house was clean, all I had to do was feed my babe and then tackle the (growing) mountain of laundry. Almost too conveniently, as I was congratulating myself on whipping up a whole batch of bananas to be frozen (time saved for later!), I opened the freezer and an entire package of coffee (ground, which I don't normally buy but did this week to save time on grinding it myself - oh the irony) spread over my entire kitchen floor. Someone somewhere, was laughing at me, FOR SURE. I stayed calmed, swept it up (to be vacuumed later AFTER MISS P WAKES UP!), fed baby Em, ran to drop in a load of laundry while baby Em took a minute to digest in her chair. I heard strange noises, I went running in time to see Baby Em doing a projectile of bananas, milk, water - everywhere. Chair cover, onesie, skirt, now added to the laundry pile. 
AHHHHHH. There I said it. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, I wish I could tell you I embilished even one event or struggle. I didn't. BUT you know what? As long as this is,( I PROMISE I WILL NOT MAKE THIS A HABIT), this is making me feel better. SO MUCH BETTER. There were a lot of places where I really could have lost my mind completely today and did not. As a result, I still had some fun, tender, loving, laughable moments. Now Miss P is awake, Baby Em is asleep, and I am about to go and get myself a coffee. WHO KNOWS where the rest of this day is going to take me? In the meantime, I need to throw in ANOTHER load of laundry and vacuum up the rest of the ground coffee on my floor. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=that-kind-of-a-day</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 22 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=nature-walks</guid>
						<title>Nature Walks</title>
						<description><![CDATA[We are big into nature walks right now. Twice a day in the deep dark forest (a name given to it by Miss P and Daddy). She splashes and jumps, climbs (trees, bridges, rocks....), looks for animals and leaves, and follows some rituals she has made for herself. One,  is walking on the edge of the path. Another is smashing mushrooms (poisons). Since she used to LOVE mushrooms, I had to teach her the difference between the ones we eat and the ones outside. All those growing outside are referred to as poisons. They are BAD.This is why she takes such pleasure in smashing mushrooms. A couple of days ago,  she looked at me with a straight face and said, "Mommy, I am a little concerned about these poisonous mushrooms. Mostly because a little baby could come and put them in their mouth. So, I am smashing them with my splishing, splashing, squashing rubber boots."
Where does she get this from? 
The final ritual, is climbing the big rock. When she climbs the big rock, she shouts at the top of her voice....holdatbigechonuh-ee. Hold that big echo nutty. What does that crazy talk mean? I have not quite figured it out. Its the first thing she said when she discovered her echo. So,  now she shouts it every time. Nutty by the way, is Miss P speak for squirrel. The rest is still a bit of mystery to me. I just love that her mind works in overdrive and the thoughts and words and actions it produces. Even though it makes me CRAZY on a regular basis, I sort of love that I have no idea how that wild and wonderful little mind works. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=nature-walks</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 21 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=peek-a-boo</guid>
						<title>Peek-a-boo!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[When I play peek-a-boo with baby Em, Instead of hiding my whole face behind a blanket I like to hide my face behind her little feet. I pop my head up, and suprise! After a couple of times, I pop my head to the right or left or lower than I did the time before. I love to watch the anticipation on her face. She is still looking where my face last appeared!  It is so cute...and clever too, I think. 

It doesn't change as we grow. We continue to look for things where we expect to find them. If they are always there, we don't have to even think about it. What happens then,  when things are not where we thought we left them, or where we think they ought to be? Some people just keep looking in that same place. Others, shift their focus, change their perspecitve, or even sometimes, the lense through which they are viewing their world. ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=peek-a-boo</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 20 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=because-this-is-special-part-two</guid>
						<title>Because this is special, part two.</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I hadn't planned a part two of yesterday's story until part two actually happenned today. 
Miss P was back to her dancing. She called out to me from the family room (I was fussing in the kitchen again).
"Come and dance Mommy!" she cried

"In a moment sweetie, Mommy is getting baby Em's cereal ready" I answered (as usual?)

"But Mommy, this is your favorite song..." she reminded me.
"I know sweetheart..." (guilty bad mom feelings).
"and its almost over, YOU'RE GOING TO MISS IT...." she exclaimed.
"that's ok sweetheart, Mommy will play it again...." .

Wait a minute, isn't THAT the problem? Life is not set up for instant replay. There are no "do-overs" and  there IS NO PAUSE or  REWIND button. 
I guess I could have finished what I was doing and then played that song again. Or I could do what I am trying to do more of. Which is to STOP,  BREATH and take in the moment. Times like these are not unlimited.  Before I know it - miss p will think I am the weirdest person in the world for wanting to bust a move in the middle of our family room (her Daddy already does!).
 ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=because-this-is-special-part-two</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 19 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=because-this-is-special</guid>
						<title>Because, this is special!</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I have come to realize that having a second child, while challenging, is not the greatest obstacle to stopping and savouring each moment with my precocious, sky's the limit, non stop toddler. The greatest competition miss p faces on a daily basis, is our home. There is always SOMETHING that needs to be done...and me, being me, it can never wait. Our house must look right, orderly, clean, together. My brain doesn't work as well in a disorderly home, it confuses me, makes my eye twitch (very dramatic stuff). I made a little  promise to myself (and to my girls) before baby em arrived, to try to remind myself of the following;  

"cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow,  babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow. So settle down cobwebs and dust go to sleep, I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep." 

First time I read it, it made me cry. Paige was already too wiggly to be rocked. WHERE DOES THE TIME GO? How many dinners prepared, dishes washed, laundry folded,  FLOORS VACUUMED, does it take for a baby to grow up? 


Today, Miss P called for me from the family room as I was fussing in the kitchen...., "Mommy, come dance".....
 
"In a moment sweetie, Mommy is getting dinner..." I responded.... 


pitter patter came her little feet into the kitchen, "Mommy," more persistently, "hold my hands..."

"How come?" I answered.

"Because I NEED YOU", she replied.
"How come?" I asked...

"Because, this is special!" she exclaimed.

Holding hands, we skipped sideways into the family room. Baby Em cheered us on from her exersaucer (with her now favorite razberry hanging out of her mouth). We danced a bit and Miss P shouted out with glee, "my dream is coming true Mommy!! Look, we're skating! Look! We're skiing, My dream is coming true! WE"RE DANCING!!!"
 
For that brief moment, what would it have mattered if we were skating on crumbs, or skiing on dust, or dancing on a pile of laundry that didn't get folded whule the clothes were still warm?]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=because-this-is-special</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 18 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=compromise</guid>
						<title>Compromise</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Last week we had dinner at my in-laws house. Baby Em showed up with her new teething toy - "the RaZbaby".  It looks just like a suss, though much larger. The handle and outer part of this weird looking teether, are green and shaped like leaves on a vine. The nuk part is red and bumpy like a raspberry - hence the name "RaZbaby".
During the course of our visit that day, both my Mother-in-law and Father-in-law referred to the teether as a strawberry. I noticed but didn't say anything. 
Apparently somebody else noticed too.
Three days later in the car, out of silence, comes the following exchange;
"Mommy, " says Miss P, "Grandma calls baby em's teether, strawberry". 

"You're right Miss P, she does", I respond, "but its not a strawberry, is it? It's a raspberry." 

"Papa calls that strawberry too."

"You're right sweetheart, he does". 

SILENCE

"WELL," she says, "We could just call that strawberry-raspberry".

"You're right", I say, "We could. That's called compromise. Do you know what compromise is?"

SILENCE

"Well," I say, "its an agreement between two different ideas".

SILENCE. Change of topic.
 
Imagine if compromise, when needed,  was that easy? With children and families and friends and coworkers,  with politicians, and world leaders..... how nice would that be? ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=compromise</link>
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						<pubDate>Wed, 17 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-do-you-think-this-is-ok-for-me</guid>
						<title>"Mommy, do you think this is OK for me?"</title>
						<description><![CDATA[Miss P likes to walk the balance beam. Curbs, dividers, narrow paths. It's living on the edge for a little girl who's soon to be three. She spent last summer and fall walking on curbs, penguin walking, she called it. 
On a gravel path near our house, there is a narrow strip of grass. She loves to walk along this "off road" path. The only problem is, she is not the only species in our neighborhood who likes to do this. It is popular with the canines and walking along this path can be a little messy at times. 
Knowing this, Miss  P said to me yesterday, "Mommy, do you think its ok for me to walk on this path?". 

"I suppose so." I responded.
"Mommy, I have an idea," she said, "when you see doggy poop, yell DOGGY POOP!".
And so it went. She walked along on the edge, the path less traveled, if you will. I, her eyes where she could not see, called out dutifully, when necessary, "DOGGY POOP!". Off she'd come, until it was safe again. Then she'd make her way back to her path. Each time, she'd ask, "Mommy, do you think this is ok for me?"
I'd say, "yes" and she'd say, "well, if you see some doggy poop, just yell DOGGY POOP!"
 
How much would I like to keep this buddy system in tact for the years to come? Those pre-teen, in between, then teen years. When false friends and tough choices are the "doggy poop", so to speak. I'd stay in the background (or off to the side) and she'd feel safe taking her path, trusting that if unseen dangers lay in wait, the secret call, "Doggy Poop" would come in time to steer her away from any messes. I'd trust in her to listen when it really mattered, she'd trust in me for giving her the space she needed to grow.
This would be OK for me.
 ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=mommy-do-you-think-this-is-ok-for-me</link>
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						<pubDate>Tue, 16 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=where-are-my-toys</guid>
						<title>Where are my toys?</title>
						<description><![CDATA[I always know I'm onto something good when Miss P takes to professing her love for me at five minute intervals. It goes something like this, "Mommy, I LOVE YOU...". (play play play)
"Mommy, I LUVVVV YA!". And on it goes...
This usually happens when we're doing crafts (one of her best favorite things to do) but today it happenned when our plans for a nature walk were rained out. Baby Em was feeding and Miss P was aimlessly wandering, looking for some trouble to get into. 
"Miss P," I said, "why don't you play with your toys?" (a strange request because she doesn't really EVER play with toys)
What happened next is just so silly. She looked at me with wide eyes, then looked around and said, "But Mommy, where ARE my toys?". 
Wow. There are toys everywhere. A kitchen, groceries, bins of balls and cars and purses and phones. Teasets and zoos and dollhouses, the list goes on. 
Could it be possible that there were SO MANY toys, that she really could not see any of them?  Now I was the one that was shocked. I try so hard to keep half of her toys put away and the rest, "strategically" placed in each room.
What happenned next was an eyeopener. I quickly decided on two themes. Barnyard and "things that go". Anything that did not fit that description went in a huge bin to be put away. Books, puppets, stuffies, toys, everything to do with these themes, slowly made its way into our central play spot. Things came from every room in the house. Miss P loved helping me. Then, when we were finished,  to my suprise and delight, she sat down and played. She played and read. And as she poured over her books, taking time to bounce around and make Baby Em laugh until she fell over (literally), she got down to telling me over and over how much she loved me. I could get used to that.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=where-are-my-toys</link>
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						<pubDate>Mon, 15 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=puzzles</guid>
						<title>Puzzles</title>
						<description><![CDATA[My eldest daughter, Miss P, LOVES puzzles. The box of 24 pieces kind of puzzles that cost less than five dollars. She could sit for hours, doing the same puzzle over and over again. Looking at each piece, its colours and parts. Trying to decide if it might be a fit...."do you think so, Mommy?" she'll ask as she tries to work it out. Truthfully, I don't think she's too concerned with what I think. It's just that sometimes, things like puzzles are easier to figure out with another perspective. 
There is alot to be learned from this exercise, in the department of life skills. Patience. Focus. The knowledge that the little parts are each a part of something greater. The bigger picture. Now that's a lesson that will come in handy time and time again.]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=puzzles</link>
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						<pubDate>Sun, 14 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=remembering-gran-gran</guid>
						<title>Remembering Gran Gran</title>
						<description><![CDATA[A year ago today, Gran Gran left this world. He lived well nearly to the end of his days. Or make that years. 94 of them to be precise. 
He liked to play jokes on people, humourous cards, stuffed toys that made sounds, like a monkey that whistled as you walked by or a pig that burped or, well you get the point. 
He was current and with it. Read the paper, watched the news. Had a scotch every day. He walked every day too, until he fell and broke his hip. He loved loved loved to give my brother a hard time. He used to play peek-a-boo with us when we were little, hence the nick name "peeky peeky" - he and I would sign cards that way, like a secret name for eachother. One year as a gift, our family bought him a license plate that said PKE PKE. 
He wasn't just my Gran Gran, he became a grandfather to my husband, who lost his grandfather's as a child and never had that relationship in his life. My husband loved Gran Gran's unabashed grumpiness (it was harmless). He loved him too, very much. But Gran Gran also became a Gran Gran to our daughter, Miss P. He adored her. He held her, watched her, listened to her, laughed at her.They saw alot of one another. If you asked Miss P, "who says Peeky Peeky?", she'd tell you, "Gran Gran does". Everyonce in a while, she'll mention him. Even though someday she'll forget,  she is just so blessed to have had him in her life. I suspect if you asked him, he'd say the same of her.
 
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=remembering-gran-gran</link>
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						<pubDate>Sat, 13 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=grow-old-along-with-me</guid>
						<title>Grow old along with me...</title>
						<description><![CDATA["Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be"...that's what the card said. I bought it for my husband after he asked me to marry him. Not that I am counting, but twelve years, two months and six days ago, my husband asked me to marry him. I was 19 (almost 20). He was 23. We were in Whistler. On rollerblades.
At the time we lived in Victoria, He was completing his officer training in the Navy and I was spending the summer out west before returning to Queen's,  for my second year.
I didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up but I knew that I wanted to be with him. It hurt too much to be apart. We had to be apart alot, with him being in the Military. Things felt better, together and so that was the beginning. We had dinner that night at a restaurant called Araxi. I still carry a matchbook in my wallet. Call it weird or romantic. It is a token of a memory.
Eleven years is a long time in a 32 and 35 year olds lives. It took us a while to get where we are.  It took us a while to become who we are as individuals and as husband and wife(for better and for worse). We took the long road. It was eight years before Miss P entered out lives. And we were wiser for it. Now we are blessed with Baby Em too. We continue to learn and grow... 
The best is yet to be. 
I believe that.
]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=grow-old-along-with-me</link>
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						<pubDate>Fri, 12 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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						<guid>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-blog-is-born</guid>
						<title>A Blog is born...</title>
						<description><![CDATA[On the eve of my eleventh anniversary, and as my eldest is about to turn three, I find myself here. "Here" is where my heart opens and I try to drink each moment with my two beautiful girls. "Here", is a place, where I am reminded that life is to be cherished. Not only cherished, but remembered. So this is my gift.
For Daddy and the girls, for friends and for family.
It is a gift of remembering. 
A quote read many years ago has motivated me to finally put it all down. "I should write this so as to never to forget it" - Anais Nin.

And so, a blog is born.  ]]></description>
						<link>http://www.babyblogs.com/viewblog.php?name=misspbabyem&amp;title=a-blog-is-born</link>
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						<pubDate>Thu, 11 Oct 2007 00:00:00 +0200</pubDate>
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